zappin' through the channels ramblin'

I was at it again and was I ever so glad to see the two dweebs from RDS/RIS (born in 1974; wet-behind-the-ears) make utter fools of themselves by cutting short the "expert" analysis by old man Yvan (of the Yukon - I wish!) on how the CH so narrowingly and 'dumb-luckily' edged out their worthier opponent, to go straight to "the highlights of a press conference held by Carbo" they said - and all they had next was the WRONG press conference fast forwarding and rewinding (shutting up Carbo, in effect; freezing him still!)

LOL LMBO ROTFL LOL

Okay enough of that - I usually ABHOR net lingo, abbreviations in general and anything else in-between!

I zap further and catch myself a *good* repeat of ROBOT CHICKEN... I needed that!

I go on from there; ah, the news!
On LCN... ugh!
Still, it's not a news bulletin at all but a repeat of one of their insufferable "topic discussion shows" - hosted by one or another hothead host that they have in spades over there...

The subject is the spread, throughout the net and other means, of very controversial propaganda... An IMAM called "Al Haiti" is doing a lot of it, it would appear (he who claims to hate all forms of technology, YET has made ample use of the web to spread his hateful message, even going as far as recording HIS rants on MP3s, to better spread them around! He won't get misquoted that way, eh? There's no misunderstanding his words though... Read on!)

And so, Al Haiti is converted to Islam since 1991 or so. Ever since his "conversion", he's come up with the following:

- all Canadian women are prostitutes (a percentage is, surely...)
- all homosexuals should be beheaded (as opposed to giving head)
- the only law to be obeyed is Allah's not human law

I actually whole-heartedly agree with that last one, as long as the phrase goes like this: "only GOD's Law is Flawless; earthly law is flawed and does not dispense true justice - ONLY GOD SHALL"

Al Haiti has plenty more where that came from - my guess is: he's trying to impress Osama Bin Laden right on time for the release of his big movie there, "Where In The World Is Osama Bin Laden?" (come one everybody - sing that title to the tune of the very well-known theme song to that old kids game show, "Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego"...! (Well, you KNOW that's the inspiration for it; that and the old "Where's Waldo" fluff! But I am digressing yet again; a no-no, even when one's rambling because then it gets even MORE confusing!)

Ahh - good old LCN, trying so hard to be the French CNN, they are...

All the while they're discussing this "hot topic" I can read plenty more SHOCKING NEWS on their ticker, see...?

"9 dead after a shootout between drug dealers and police in a favela in Rio."
WOW - Brazil has it even worse than we do! These streets of ours here have plenty of drugs too - all the drugs that you want - but we never get such fireworks as those over there...!

What we get is PATHETIC:
Some odd news item from either Gatineau or Gaspésie (?) - I can't tell anymore and cannot verify it because it is NOT on the newschannel's WEBSITE (which you can see the ad for, proudly stating that they edged out very narrowingly their competition -a recurring theme, verily- right here too...)


Yay - not.
But anyhow... The G-spot on the map there (!) where there was some news-worthy "unevent" happening... Well the "unevent" was the announced arrest of several (more) dudes for their foolish involvement in drugs and their illegal merchandizing... I really wish I could catch a confirmation of this news item; because it stated that several of the arrested individuals were really UNDER AGE... They're barely out of diapers and they're already doing crack! And selling it too! Sheesh... Maybe that IMAM there (who is from that region too - sort of) should also state that "all Canadian men -Quebecers for sure- are inept MORONS" while he's at it, eh? But that would be an even bigger overstatement and undermine the other "truths" he says...

Then I stay on a little longer - but dreading even worse anchor persons to show up, and tiring of the ticker too, I finally zap onwards...

I land on totally different news territory: the beloved RTP.
But I quickly tire of the 200-word-a-minute speed of the speakerine (otherwise very, very interesting Luso gal...!) and move on...

I tell you, satellite TV really is as bad as cable TV; there might be 5700 channels instead of just 570 or 57 - but there's still pretty much NOTHING ON!!!

DISS THE DISH, I say!
And I don't care if they cut the signal and go ALL-HD soon; they will be doing me a FAVOR then!!!

I might just find time to watch (and finally find out) WHAT IS on all of those old VHS tapes that I have all over the place...!!!

Forget DVDs, Blu-Rays and HD - I'm reacquainting myself with my VCR and VHS here!

What a teary-eyed reunion that'll be...!
As soon as they cut the regular signal - it's ON!

For now though, I just throw away the remote, in total utter disgust because, as if it wasn't enough, the last thing I catch is ANOTHER reminder that the creepy Canadiens, the hateful Habs, the moronic Montreal team managed just ONE GOAL (what a great "offensive machine" they are, eh Gildor! And he calls himself a BRUINS fan - HA!) and still they stole victory from the Boston Bruins with this lone LUCKY goal - on the power play. Again, the ref was the deciding factor. The Bruins could be LEADING this series 3-1; instead they trail it 3-1. No matter - they've already proven their point, no matter what happens next: they are as much the serious Cup contender than the CH is. Plus, they have a better work ethic and more character and guts! There's no comparison TO BE MADE...

But enough rambling.