that's news to me... almost
Here I was, again watching the newsfeed from the old stomping grounds (whether it was on cable or via my satellite provider is for you to wonder and try to guess; not for me to tell!) and I must say that I can't stop laughing whenever I indulge in this stuff - seriously, Comedy Central has nothing on these guys!
They lament on and on about "La Réforne Scolaire" (on TQS) and underline its necessity due to the fact that kids over there have no clue how to spell anymore... But the thing is, they are really talking about LA RÉFORME SCOLAIRE - of course.
Ok, a typo happens to the best of them (and me, I get whole sentences messed up real bad whenever my slow connection "hangs" while I type away...! So, I do sympathize, yes - but it was funny that they took SO LONG to notice their typo and correct it! There they were lamenting the fact kids are clueless and even the news broadcast makes such a glaring mistake...! Priceless. Only in Québec!)
Onwards to some so-called "cultural news" then - Sandrine Kiberlain is shooting a film on top of the famed Mount Royal (where I once shot some scenes too, for "The Wedding Dress," a short film so short, my scenes were left on the cutting room floor and trampled on by the assistant-director! But that is another story... At least I was on Mount Royal in the SUMMER, not in the dead of winter!) and so, on top of the mountain, Sandrine K says that she keeps "mean people at a distance" (she must see them come from a mile away, of course, while up there) and only surrounds herself with nice people. Sandrine? They're really not nice, you know... They're called HYPOCRITES. Québec is chock-full of them. Get on with the program!
Some people have never heard of wolf in sheep's clothing - or they think it to be strictly the stuff of fairy tales, eh?
Sandrine K, once in Quebec, would normally be very lonely on top of that mountain, if she truly was kept company exclusively by "nice people" only!
Louis Morissette, for example, is definitely in the category "anything BUT nice" but then again so are many French compatriotes of the ingenue/film director...
After that bit of "news" we get shanghaied into sports, or so it seems...
They can't stop raving about the first ever huge comeback-from-behind win in Canadiens history that occurred just last night at Montreal's Bell Center. They've stolen championships, they've won a flurry of one-goal, by-the-skin-of-their-teeth "victories" but they'd never in their long, long history come back from a 5-0 deficit. Ever. And they did it on the 19th of February of the year of our Lord 2008, against the New York Rangers who, usually, had their number... Whoopee-doo. The inane fanboys are dreaming of another "undeserved championship" again - dream on, nerds! But that is not the point I am getting at here... of course!
What made it doubly special, that "historical feat" of the 19th, was that this happened in the 100th anniversary of the franchise. And, on the 20th, it just so happened that they concocted a mini-spectacle to commemorate the birthday of one of the most simplistically-named, hastily-put together franchise of all-time...! And they assembled all the most famous local fanboys that they could find to put this together, because they knew it'd be a "labor of love" for them too...!
Denis Bouchard directing (what exactly - traffic on stage?)
something "written" by George-Hébert Germain (what did he write here - a timetable? The anecdotes to be recited by some of the Canadiens' old-timers? They could be but a revised (in not-so-pure revisionistic history fashion) pack of lies then! But I digress...)
with music by François Dompierre (what, true classic music wasn't good enough for the Habs?!? More likely it would have gone to waste there... I say classical music because this is an OSM show! Yes - the Orchestre Symphonique de Montréal is the true culprit here - and their mercenary maestro, Kent Nagano, is the mastermind behind it all too! His vain efforts to generate interest for the OSM amongst all strata of society there -something all previous Chefs d'Orchestre in place failed to do quite miserably- included a themed-concert about Terry Fox and another about that General Dallaire who basically has, as his claim to fame, the dubious honor of having witnessed a genocide taking place right before his eyes; and not having done all that much about it. That's an anniversary coming up soon too; the 15th, maybe? But they'd rather focus on the Habs' 100th and also Juste Pour Rire's 25th - read on...)
So, this would-be grandiose spectacle is put together (just as hastily as the Canadiens franchise was both named and established, way back in 1908 - their favored beer brand and sponsors, for their part, claim to be "jeune depuis 1903" - but that's another story!) and is titled... "les Glorieux."
HA.
I found it much more appropriate that, come commercial break, they announced the coming to town of the show of shows (as far as Broadway may go anyways; outdoors, on the grandest stage of all, we will get to see much better, I just know it... Again, READ ON...!) and I do mean... "les Misérables."
(Not kidding ya at all! The miserable, atrocious state of Montreal's infrastructures is now officially at the SUPRA-ALARMING stage! They can't repair the roads anymore; the moment they patch up one of their infamous "nids de poule," another appears and another and another... And the one they did repair fizzles and unravels too, in record time... By city officials' own admission, the work is always TO BE DONE for the roads, bridges and overpasses are in constant need for maintenance and restoration - 365 days a year! They were saying that and showing examples of streets that, even though only two years old, are in complete desolate state... And images of an overpass that is being DEMOLISHED BEFORE IT COLLAPSES ALL ON ITS OWN followed... And then, the cherry on top as far as I am concerned, a bridge I know very well from years past, le Pont Lachapelle, is so old it apparently has its days NUMBERED - by the looks of it! AND TO THINK THAT I WALKED ON THAT - AND SO DID MY DAD! I don't want to die due to flawed Montreal infrastructures; if I must croak, let it be due to my own flaws, ok? LOL But I am digressing again...)
Come OOOOON now - what was ever so "glorious" about the likes of Maurice, Guy, Henri, Yvan and, say, Bernard "Boom-Boom" Geoffrion?!? Athletes should have NEVER been placed upon a pedestal - EVER. Nagano or Bouchard said that these were the modern-day "heroes" - what happened to firemen all of a sudden?!? Or GOOD cops? Germain commented that it was the collective dream of a nation, anglos or "Canadiens-Français" alike, to be a Canadiens player (if you were a brainless boy or a "garçon manqué" I figure...!) and/or to see the team compete and win it all... Since when does the majority of any given people decide to indulge in something that is TRULY GOOD, George? (Tu peux ben être un George, le Germain...!)
Throughout history we've seen one constant: the masses always make the WRONG CHOICE. They chose Barabbas over Jesus, didn't they? They chose to forget about Moses and venerate a newly-crafted Golden Calf, didn't they? And they elected Dubya twice - didn't they? Verily, the only good thing about the Habs "uniting all Quebeckers, anglo or franco alike' is that they provided a DISTRACTION, so that no one in the silly province of Quebec were thinking of staging a "Révolution Tranquille" or mounting an endless and pointless debate over the validity of a French-speaking nation in North America AS LONG AS THE DAMN CANADIENS WERE PLAYING HOCKEY!!!
And, yes, calling the likes of Jean Béliveau and Pierre Bouchard (PIERRE... BOUCHARD?!? Sheesh...) "les Glorieux" reeks of idolatry (very misguided one at that) and is a sad, sad step backwards for humanity - close to being the same as when Greeks and Romans really believed there was a bunch of he-men and hedonistic ladies on top of Mount Olympus...!
Don't they have enough nicknames as it is? They're the DAMN HABS... the Canadiens... the Cans!!! The "Bleu, Blanc, Rouge"... BUT THERE IS NO GLORY THERE - THERE NEVER WAS!
Wanna know what a true GLORIOUS line-up is ALL ABOUT?
Center: JESUS-CHRIST
Right-wing: ARCHANGEL GABRIEL
Left-wing: ARCHANGEL MICHAEL
Defense: ARCHANGELS RAPHAEL & URIEL
and goaltender: ST. PETER!
(The back-up goalie must be... St. Paul?)
(And the second line must be assorted apostles!)
(Third and fourth lines: a mix of cherubs and saints!)
If you score against this truly ALL-STAR LINE-UP,
they let you not into the damnable "Hall of Fame" but rather, they let you into the Hall of Halls - Heaven!
The General Manager and Coach of that TRULY GLORIOUS TEAM Is, of course, GOD THE FATHER!
See - no silly ashtray trophy to win here (or trash can; whatever it is nowadays, Lord Stanley's piece of kitchen ware is no longer a "cup" and much less a facsimile of the Grail...!)
THERE IS MUCH, MUCH BETTER TO WIN!
Start practicing for THAT...!
But enough about this - for now! ;)
Onwards to the WEATHER!
Ah - something special on the menu for tonight, so tells me the curvaceous (even in the bitter cold of Quebec City) Colette Provencher!
A LUNAR ECLIPSE!
Wow!
And they quickly go to the authority on the subject (the boring spokesman for the Planetarium de Montreal! Again - Montreal! Arrrgghhh!) who quickly notes that, around 10pm and 11pm, when we do see the moon getting colorful (either a bright orange or a blood-red, uh, red!) it will simply due to the fact that light emanating from US, from the Earth, will be illuminating the moon, for once... How's that for turning the tables, eh? And so, the hidden message is loud and clear here: don't even think for a SECOND that it's the end of the world being announced on the greatest marquee of all there - even if the moon is crimson and cloverish! Nope, folks; it is NOT the end and no big deal at all!
Well, astronomer dude, think about it for two seconds instead of being the automaton that repeats ad nauseam what you've been taught...
Ever since lunar eclipses have occurred and been chronicled, the Earth has CHANGED. You're with me on that, so far? Good!
The light pollution has grown exponentially - and it is not the only form of pollution at all that has multiplied on our pathetic planet, of course...
So, the prophecy you dread so much that you have to explain to the masses, each time there is a lunar eclipse, WHY the moon turns a certain color, CANNOT be discounted... And, in fact, it is VALIDATED! For it said that, when the moon would turn BLOOD RED, the End would be imminent. And, quite obviously, it is the end of Earth, not the end of the moon! Since the light emanating from the EARTH will in effect accomplish the color scheme that the moon will get for an hour's time (just about) we can therefore assess that the next few lunar eclipses should be THE "blood-red moon" the prophecy alluded to, for the light coming through our atmosphere as the sun is in our back NOW is very different from both the light and the atmosphere we had during all the previous lunar eclipses! The planet wasn't the same - the sun itself wasn't as old nor as prone to flare up as it is now! Hence, NOW we can truly expect THE blood-red moon OF SIGNIFICANCE... Ominous significance and foreboding, aye! With all that in mind... Enjoy the lunar eclipse! :)
IN OTHER NEWS:
Juste Pourrir (euh... I mean, Pour Rire) also known as Just For Laughs is exporting itself in 2009, just (!) in time for its 25th anniversary. Yay.
Those are the only true exportables Quebec has, isn't it: second-rate artistics and lab rat assistants! Sheesh!
No wonder those who get the nod to get exported will go so willingly too; the grass is more greener, it IS everywhere else, while in Quebec, it's DEAD most of the year...
Another anniversary that goes hand-in-hand with the Habs' 100th is the whole blamed province of Québec's 400th! The "indefatigable" Denis Bouchard was involved in that one too, earlier in the year, and will be again as more festivities are organized all-throughout this 400th harsh winter and the rest of the year too... (lol)
Bouchard, a native from my old stomping grounds true-and-true (he even attended the same high school as I!) had this inane comment about an earlier outdoors show in which he "directed" traffic once again... He said "they survived the winter 400 years ago, the least we can do is survive a couple of hours too!" (I paraphrase, of course; why bother to dig out the quote, ad verbatim, huh? For the record though, he might have said "we can tolerate the cold for two hours too" instead of speaking of survival for his actors on stage...!)
The thing is, Denis, they did NOT survive, 400 years ago!
The first settlers in what was to become Québec City had no idea what they were getting into - and they all died that first winter here! New fools were brought in the moment the ice melted and spring made it possible for more ships from France to come by, bringing rats and pestilence with them too, but that is another story...
Les Filles Du Roy were the main attraction...! ;)
And I'm sure fur coats became the norm instantly in large part thanks to them!
I can imagine Denis skipping History class in our old alma mater... *lol*
(They called it "foxer les cours" back then!)
Just like a Denis to do so too!
Anyhow...
nuff ramblin!
They lament on and on about "La Réforne Scolaire" (on TQS) and underline its necessity due to the fact that kids over there have no clue how to spell anymore... But the thing is, they are really talking about LA RÉFORME SCOLAIRE - of course.
Ok, a typo happens to the best of them (and me, I get whole sentences messed up real bad whenever my slow connection "hangs" while I type away...! So, I do sympathize, yes - but it was funny that they took SO LONG to notice their typo and correct it! There they were lamenting the fact kids are clueless and even the news broadcast makes such a glaring mistake...! Priceless. Only in Québec!)
Onwards to some so-called "cultural news" then - Sandrine Kiberlain is shooting a film on top of the famed Mount Royal (where I once shot some scenes too, for "The Wedding Dress," a short film so short, my scenes were left on the cutting room floor and trampled on by the assistant-director! But that is another story... At least I was on Mount Royal in the SUMMER, not in the dead of winter!) and so, on top of the mountain, Sandrine K says that she keeps "mean people at a distance" (she must see them come from a mile away, of course, while up there) and only surrounds herself with nice people. Sandrine? They're really not nice, you know... They're called HYPOCRITES. Québec is chock-full of them. Get on with the program!
Some people have never heard of wolf in sheep's clothing - or they think it to be strictly the stuff of fairy tales, eh?
Sandrine K, once in Quebec, would normally be very lonely on top of that mountain, if she truly was kept company exclusively by "nice people" only!
Louis Morissette, for example, is definitely in the category "anything BUT nice" but then again so are many French compatriotes of the ingenue/film director...
After that bit of "news" we get shanghaied into sports, or so it seems...
They can't stop raving about the first ever huge comeback-from-behind win in Canadiens history that occurred just last night at Montreal's Bell Center. They've stolen championships, they've won a flurry of one-goal, by-the-skin-of-their-teeth "victories" but they'd never in their long, long history come back from a 5-0 deficit. Ever. And they did it on the 19th of February of the year of our Lord 2008, against the New York Rangers who, usually, had their number... Whoopee-doo. The inane fanboys are dreaming of another "undeserved championship" again - dream on, nerds! But that is not the point I am getting at here... of course!
What made it doubly special, that "historical feat" of the 19th, was that this happened in the 100th anniversary of the franchise. And, on the 20th, it just so happened that they concocted a mini-spectacle to commemorate the birthday of one of the most simplistically-named, hastily-put together franchise of all-time...! And they assembled all the most famous local fanboys that they could find to put this together, because they knew it'd be a "labor of love" for them too...!
Denis Bouchard directing (what exactly - traffic on stage?)
something "written" by George-Hébert Germain (what did he write here - a timetable? The anecdotes to be recited by some of the Canadiens' old-timers? They could be but a revised (in not-so-pure revisionistic history fashion) pack of lies then! But I digress...)
with music by François Dompierre (what, true classic music wasn't good enough for the Habs?!? More likely it would have gone to waste there... I say classical music because this is an OSM show! Yes - the Orchestre Symphonique de Montréal is the true culprit here - and their mercenary maestro, Kent Nagano, is the mastermind behind it all too! His vain efforts to generate interest for the OSM amongst all strata of society there -something all previous Chefs d'Orchestre in place failed to do quite miserably- included a themed-concert about Terry Fox and another about that General Dallaire who basically has, as his claim to fame, the dubious honor of having witnessed a genocide taking place right before his eyes; and not having done all that much about it. That's an anniversary coming up soon too; the 15th, maybe? But they'd rather focus on the Habs' 100th and also Juste Pour Rire's 25th - read on...)
So, this would-be grandiose spectacle is put together (just as hastily as the Canadiens franchise was both named and established, way back in 1908 - their favored beer brand and sponsors, for their part, claim to be "jeune depuis 1903" - but that's another story!) and is titled... "les Glorieux."
HA.
I found it much more appropriate that, come commercial break, they announced the coming to town of the show of shows (as far as Broadway may go anyways; outdoors, on the grandest stage of all, we will get to see much better, I just know it... Again, READ ON...!) and I do mean... "les Misérables."
(Not kidding ya at all! The miserable, atrocious state of Montreal's infrastructures is now officially at the SUPRA-ALARMING stage! They can't repair the roads anymore; the moment they patch up one of their infamous "nids de poule," another appears and another and another... And the one they did repair fizzles and unravels too, in record time... By city officials' own admission, the work is always TO BE DONE for the roads, bridges and overpasses are in constant need for maintenance and restoration - 365 days a year! They were saying that and showing examples of streets that, even though only two years old, are in complete desolate state... And images of an overpass that is being DEMOLISHED BEFORE IT COLLAPSES ALL ON ITS OWN followed... And then, the cherry on top as far as I am concerned, a bridge I know very well from years past, le Pont Lachapelle, is so old it apparently has its days NUMBERED - by the looks of it! AND TO THINK THAT I WALKED ON THAT - AND SO DID MY DAD! I don't want to die due to flawed Montreal infrastructures; if I must croak, let it be due to my own flaws, ok? LOL But I am digressing again...)
Come OOOOON now - what was ever so "glorious" about the likes of Maurice, Guy, Henri, Yvan and, say, Bernard "Boom-Boom" Geoffrion?!? Athletes should have NEVER been placed upon a pedestal - EVER. Nagano or Bouchard said that these were the modern-day "heroes" - what happened to firemen all of a sudden?!? Or GOOD cops? Germain commented that it was the collective dream of a nation, anglos or "Canadiens-Français" alike, to be a Canadiens player (if you were a brainless boy or a "garçon manqué" I figure...!) and/or to see the team compete and win it all... Since when does the majority of any given people decide to indulge in something that is TRULY GOOD, George? (Tu peux ben être un George, le Germain...!)
Throughout history we've seen one constant: the masses always make the WRONG CHOICE. They chose Barabbas over Jesus, didn't they? They chose to forget about Moses and venerate a newly-crafted Golden Calf, didn't they? And they elected Dubya twice - didn't they? Verily, the only good thing about the Habs "uniting all Quebeckers, anglo or franco alike' is that they provided a DISTRACTION, so that no one in the silly province of Quebec were thinking of staging a "Révolution Tranquille" or mounting an endless and pointless debate over the validity of a French-speaking nation in North America AS LONG AS THE DAMN CANADIENS WERE PLAYING HOCKEY!!!
And, yes, calling the likes of Jean Béliveau and Pierre Bouchard (PIERRE... BOUCHARD?!? Sheesh...) "les Glorieux" reeks of idolatry (very misguided one at that) and is a sad, sad step backwards for humanity - close to being the same as when Greeks and Romans really believed there was a bunch of he-men and hedonistic ladies on top of Mount Olympus...!
Don't they have enough nicknames as it is? They're the DAMN HABS... the Canadiens... the Cans!!! The "Bleu, Blanc, Rouge"... BUT THERE IS NO GLORY THERE - THERE NEVER WAS!
Wanna know what a true GLORIOUS line-up is ALL ABOUT?
Center: JESUS-CHRIST
Right-wing: ARCHANGEL GABRIEL
Left-wing: ARCHANGEL MICHAEL
Defense: ARCHANGELS RAPHAEL & URIEL
and goaltender: ST. PETER!
(The back-up goalie must be... St. Paul?)
(And the second line must be assorted apostles!)
(Third and fourth lines: a mix of cherubs and saints!)
If you score against this truly ALL-STAR LINE-UP,
they let you not into the damnable "Hall of Fame" but rather, they let you into the Hall of Halls - Heaven!
The General Manager and Coach of that TRULY GLORIOUS TEAM Is, of course, GOD THE FATHER!
See - no silly ashtray trophy to win here (or trash can; whatever it is nowadays, Lord Stanley's piece of kitchen ware is no longer a "cup" and much less a facsimile of the Grail...!)
THERE IS MUCH, MUCH BETTER TO WIN!
Start practicing for THAT...!
But enough about this - for now! ;)
Onwards to the WEATHER!
Ah - something special on the menu for tonight, so tells me the curvaceous (even in the bitter cold of Quebec City) Colette Provencher!
A LUNAR ECLIPSE!
Wow!
And they quickly go to the authority on the subject (the boring spokesman for the Planetarium de Montreal! Again - Montreal! Arrrgghhh!) who quickly notes that, around 10pm and 11pm, when we do see the moon getting colorful (either a bright orange or a blood-red, uh, red!) it will simply due to the fact that light emanating from US, from the Earth, will be illuminating the moon, for once... How's that for turning the tables, eh? And so, the hidden message is loud and clear here: don't even think for a SECOND that it's the end of the world being announced on the greatest marquee of all there - even if the moon is crimson and cloverish! Nope, folks; it is NOT the end and no big deal at all!
Well, astronomer dude, think about it for two seconds instead of being the automaton that repeats ad nauseam what you've been taught...
Ever since lunar eclipses have occurred and been chronicled, the Earth has CHANGED. You're with me on that, so far? Good!
The light pollution has grown exponentially - and it is not the only form of pollution at all that has multiplied on our pathetic planet, of course...
So, the prophecy you dread so much that you have to explain to the masses, each time there is a lunar eclipse, WHY the moon turns a certain color, CANNOT be discounted... And, in fact, it is VALIDATED! For it said that, when the moon would turn BLOOD RED, the End would be imminent. And, quite obviously, it is the end of Earth, not the end of the moon! Since the light emanating from the EARTH will in effect accomplish the color scheme that the moon will get for an hour's time (just about) we can therefore assess that the next few lunar eclipses should be THE "blood-red moon" the prophecy alluded to, for the light coming through our atmosphere as the sun is in our back NOW is very different from both the light and the atmosphere we had during all the previous lunar eclipses! The planet wasn't the same - the sun itself wasn't as old nor as prone to flare up as it is now! Hence, NOW we can truly expect THE blood-red moon OF SIGNIFICANCE... Ominous significance and foreboding, aye! With all that in mind... Enjoy the lunar eclipse! :)
IN OTHER NEWS:
Juste Pourrir (euh... I mean, Pour Rire) also known as Just For Laughs is exporting itself in 2009, just (!) in time for its 25th anniversary. Yay.
Those are the only true exportables Quebec has, isn't it: second-rate artistics and lab rat assistants! Sheesh!
No wonder those who get the nod to get exported will go so willingly too; the grass is more greener, it IS everywhere else, while in Quebec, it's DEAD most of the year...
Another anniversary that goes hand-in-hand with the Habs' 100th is the whole blamed province of Québec's 400th! The "indefatigable" Denis Bouchard was involved in that one too, earlier in the year, and will be again as more festivities are organized all-throughout this 400th harsh winter and the rest of the year too... (lol)
Bouchard, a native from my old stomping grounds true-and-true (he even attended the same high school as I!) had this inane comment about an earlier outdoors show in which he "directed" traffic once again... He said "they survived the winter 400 years ago, the least we can do is survive a couple of hours too!" (I paraphrase, of course; why bother to dig out the quote, ad verbatim, huh? For the record though, he might have said "we can tolerate the cold for two hours too" instead of speaking of survival for his actors on stage...!)
The thing is, Denis, they did NOT survive, 400 years ago!
The first settlers in what was to become Québec City had no idea what they were getting into - and they all died that first winter here! New fools were brought in the moment the ice melted and spring made it possible for more ships from France to come by, bringing rats and pestilence with them too, but that is another story...
Les Filles Du Roy were the main attraction...! ;)
And I'm sure fur coats became the norm instantly in large part thanks to them!
I can imagine Denis skipping History class in our old alma mater... *lol*
(They called it "foxer les cours" back then!)
Just like a Denis to do so too!
Anyhow...
nuff ramblin!
posted by Luminous (\ô/) Luciano™ at 4:44 PM
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