ramblings in writ

blahblahblah

2012-12-31T21:15:00.000-08:00

I am down and I can't get up... Why do such little things get me down like this?!? Oh, but they do... they surely do...

Nota Bene: Ever since the changes and "improvements" brought to Deezer's free music widgets, some odd things can and will occur upon accessing this and other pages with said widgets on them... Please be patient and keep refusing to stop the Adobe script that is initiated upon accessing this and other pages hence - the music will play, eventually...! The Adobe script that is slowing your computer will NOT make it unresponsive - just, indeed, slow things down for a short while... Expect to have to refuse to abort the script from 1 to 3 times before musical choices finally appear on the Deezer menu...!
Maybe -just maybe- if we have been experiencing this problem with the wondrous improved product given to us by Deezer.com, it must be due to our own deficient equipment? Maybe we need to upgrade Adobe Flash Player on our systems!
Please do so ASAP, then!
I sure did - and saw the difference it brought!
Thank you for your patience.
Remember that it is a virtue!
Mine is being sorely tested too.

In the meantime, until Deezer gets its act together again, enjoy the YouTube playlist kindly provided here courtesy of Luminous Luciano's own private YouTube channel, Blogger and YouTube itself - of course!

While we're at it, a word about this other "dilemma" or "concern" now:
No sections of this website may be reproduced or used in any way, partially or completely, in any fashion whatsoever without written authorization - the only exceptions to this rule occurring in the advent of an objective review of the entertaining value of said material and/or in the advent of objective and 'fair use' of my copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law.
In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107.

This is the way that I myself use other materials!
For more information, once more, go here
God Bless!

Yes - I'm done rambling in writ here - as far as *this* post is concerned, anyway!

Lots more rambling to come though -
next!
;)

R.I.B. - Ramblings In Brief - Seventh Seal

2012-01-29T19:29:00.000-08:00

Far too many annoyances out there - far too many - and waaaaaaay too much crap all over the place so that one could promptly attend to, really... And why bother dealing with any of it "in depth" either? Thus, we chose to adopt the expeditive and most efficient method, permanently: blast it all to pieces piece by piece, take no prisoners, spare no one! But doing so in a less painful way, with little doses at a time! And not so visceral as it could be either; for this is not lambasting either, now is it? Now don't get us wrong here: in doing so, we do not hope that it will be less painful for everyone involved - at all! Au contraire, we hope it will sting, stab, bite and burn even more furiously since none of these topics (with one glaring exception now and then, really - but, to be honest, there are so few of those it makes one want to cry, really...! But that is another story.) hence, none of these stories deserved or was dignified with a full post to call it its own, anywhere else on the TLB Prime Network - at blogging time, that is!

So here we go again...
MORE R.I.B. - RAMBLINGS IN BRIEF!

=====================================================

Flex is dead - what, already?
Well these virtual things are truly living up to their, ah, virtuosity, eh?
No reference to the movie of the same, really - for it was but another waste of celluloid as far as we are concerned! But that is another story - for our movie blog! Duh...

Flex is dead, therefore - and it was supposed to be the computer language of the future, not so long ago at all!!!

In its place, stands a new language with a familiar name: HTML.
HTML...?!?
Number Five, though: that's right - HTML5 is the only way to go now - at least for as long as this latest nerdy fad lasts!

As an outsider looking in, peering inside his laptop's circuitry - or trying to (like the time I cracked the old desktop open, for various reasons that motivated the violent gesture: let's not get into that right now, though...) I have to personally ask - why in blue blazes...?!?

If it is not for economical reasons (using HTML5 will be easier and more productive, and increasing productivity should boost the cash flow too - rrrright? Even computer geeks know that what matters really here: and it is the all-mighty dollar, n'est-ce pas?

Maybe it's practical reasons

Could it be safety reasons

Please tell me it's not for pure "joy of obfuscating" reasons now...! (Every six months, or so, perhaps in fear of their geeky rivals -the hackers- the I.T. crowd collectively decides to change everything: all the rules, the language, the preferred coding, the way to get things done in a constantly (purported to be) "evolving" industry intent of making money any which way it can...! The poor saps (derogatorily - oh so derogatorily) called "users" have no choice but to follow suit - once everything is obfuscated, they have to buy all the new software (if not new hardware too) just to keep everything that they've grown so used to simply in working order still...!

The obfuscation doesn't stop there though: of course, there are many more languages to use and choose from. One suspects, even, that these geeks are keen on trying to come up with as many new computer languages as there are actual languages (foreign tongues, langues, linguas - lingo, dammit!!!) in the whole blamed world! And the more chaotically confusing it gets to be, the better it is for them: for they secure their very own raison d'être as the demand for their services is ever increasing exponentially, in truth!

Next!

===========================================

Now for those of you that truly want scary signs that the end is indeed near:
beyond the fact that illogical chaos continues to ensue everywhere at the same time, in every field and in every level of society, inexorably leading us all to a pervasive and all-encompassing state of entropy and inertia...

Just a few minutes spent ogling the news ticker this past week-end would have supplied enough evidence to any and all who doubt that the end is very near indeed: why, how can you doubt when you see all the convergence of events that are happening simultaneously as we, er, blog...?

In Syria, "Army dissidents" have taken to arms and taken control of strategic areas, which led directly to clashes with legit Syrian troops and about sixty deaths - so far. Syria is one of those "hot spots" that could very well trigger a chain of events that leads to far greater numbers of casualties, there and abroad - mostly abroad.

Speaking of "hot spots" - Iran. On a parallel to ongoing concerns in re their nuclear ambitions, the country is considering retaliatory measures against the European Union in response to that embargo thing...! Iran is therefore raising the prices for their oh-so-precious Crude Oil (gotta capitalize - it's better than gold) and as if that wasn't enough motivation for WAR, they are considering banning sales altogether to the aforementioned E.U. too, for a mere jacking up of the prices is not satisfying enough in terms of retaliation...! On a parallel to all this, hence, Iran is playing the good misunderstood guy part (as its Foreign Minister plays that part so very well) having U.N. observers coming over and visiting their nuclear facilities in order to ease everyone's mind about Iran being in the process of readying itself to become a nuclear power in the full sense of the word.

I don't know about the U.N. observers, anyone else in the United Nations or anybody in general - but no one, absolutely no one should be "optimistic" here (as Iran's Foreign Minister was reputed to be feeling like, at the end of these tours by U.N. observers...! If you believe the news tickers, that is...)

Besides, if the left one doesn't get you, the right one will - North Korea does have nuclear weapons: you didn't a reminder of that now, did you?!?

Meanwhile, "the world's foremost gathering of business and political leaders" was taking place, for five days to boot, in Davos, Switzerland. It ended Sunday on what was qualified as "a sombre note". It must have started, therefore, on January 25th. Wow - and I wasn't notified?!? They got what they had coming - the sombre note was for not having invited Luminous! There!

The 5-day "summit" (since it gathered what the French call "des sommités dans le domaine" - ha!) which one can alternatively refer to as the W.E.F (what - the whiff? What are these morons SMOKING? The question must be asked - indeed! Okay - W.E.F stands for World Economic Forum - happy?) ended on such a sour note because all these geniuses, for all their business acumen and know-how, they have narrow a clue how to properly deal with Europe's "crippling Debt Crisis" (once again, it has to be capitalized because it is considerably lesser than gold: the lack of gold is the problem, yes! No matter how far we strain away from it, it always comes back to GOLD! But never mind that right now...)

We have, on one hand, a USA government that has devalued the world economy, brought about the collapse of world banking and even the devaluation of its precious paper currency - and it is it that is leading the world straight to the gutter as it is going - and yet the European Debt Crisis gets the nod as the world's worst problem right now, in the eyes of all of this elite of business and political "leaders"...

With leaders like these, it is not any surprise that the world is going down the tubes!

"Paper money" is all that is holding the world together as it stands right now indeed - and soon enough it will have as much weight as Monopoly (TM) money.

All these leaders and big money braintrust should have taken advice from Boston Bruins goaltender Tim Thomas and simply not show up at this so-called summit/waste of time...!

Tim Thomas was a no-show earlier in the same week at the White House when his team got the "honor and privilege" to be hosted by the U.S. President Barack Obama who finally acknowledged the Bruins' Stanley Cup Championship in 2011 (something the Google Zeitgeist failed pathetically at - but that is another story...) - well, Thomas felt he could pass on that and he was RIGHT.

What honor, what privilege, to be hosted by evil incarnate at worst; a mere puppet of evil forces working behind the scenes at best? B.A. is all B.S. and will, ultimately, see no other recourse than trigger another senseless, baseless WAR just to trigger another "economy boost" (a stimulant that somehow was not mentioned by any of those political leaders in Davos? Strange. It wasn't even suggested by a single one of those business leaders there - not even those in the most concerned industries? Stranger! Oh well - it is all done behind the scenes anyhow...)

I may be repeating myself - but that is the honor and privilege of he who blogs and has many blogs, forums, mouthpieces, vehicles and soapboxes with and upon which to express himself!
;-)

Now - where were we and where we heading with it?
:-!

Ah, yes - the end!
With all these crazy things going on at once -all of these and more that do not even make it onto this blog, news tickers or anywhere else- you can rest assured that you will be resting in pieces (and, if you are lucky, in peace) sometime soon - indeed.

The often-perceived as "leading idiot amongst the idiots" (his fellow countrymen comedians portray him as such, anyhow) Canada's P.M. (Prime Minister) Stephen Harper said something at that W.E.F. summit thing that was disturbing to all, especially back home, as he qualified of "economically unsustainable" any form of supplements given to an ageing population. Hence, Old Age Security cheques, that old-timers have grown accustomed to and that personally I was looking forward to, at some point in time (if the world doesn't go kablooey in the meantime, that is) could be something to put a cross upon, perhaps...?

It has been called "the prime minister's pension bombshell" - a bomb that was carefully dropped at the economic forum in Davos, Switzerland (as it is customary for Canadians to do: making a splash, but in a careful, dare I say conservative way!) and all the so-called experts and political observers fully expect that to set to spark a "war of words" (better that than a War of the Worlds, eh - the old Parliament House in Ottawa wouldn't fare well against Alien blasts) when those pesky "lawmakers return to Parliament on Monday" - ha.

As reported here: "the rhetoric has been ramping up since Prime Minister Stephen Harper said in a speech at the World Economic Forum Thursday, that an overhaul may be necessary as a growing population ages making supplements like Old Age Security economically unsustainable."

And to think that all it was was a mere comment; one made by the aforementioned "leading idiot amongst the idiots"! Still, it is one that has to be taken seriously and it is one that has "set off a firestorm of reaction on all political fronts" back home, in Ottawa.

Pension reform suddenly became the hot topic of discussion - as everyone forgot everything else that implies an upcoming doomsday or some darn thing like that...! The battle lines were clearly drawn on CTV's Question Period Sunday when panelists from the three major parties faced off with host and chief political correspondent Craig Oliver over pension reform - wow! What wondrous reporting you can find on that CTV.com site: all self-promoting and all, as it is informative too! Astounding.

His defenders made the case that their precious Stephen Harper only "wants to look at long-term longevity because he wants to ensure income security for seniors for many, many generations," said one Shelly Glover, the parliamentary secretary to the minister of finance and therefore cronie of a cronie of Harper's. As that was just the opening salvo of the debate, you can guess that everyone else rallied against her, stating that thou shall not touch the pensions or something...!

All of it embodies pretty well the Canadian culture, I think: their heads in the snow (as the sand is not available for most of the year, global warming or not. Blame it on the Revenge of Kyoto or something! Take that, Harper!) they see not the dangers right now, they think of the problems in the far future...
Sheesh.
You have to get through the present troubles in order to get to the future ones, numb-skulls!!!

But enough about all this - this which has turned into both a preview of our bonafide apocalyptic blog here, Things To Come as also one of the bonafide political blog, Canadian Dreams - wow! All that was missing was some parallels drawn to a certain Pumpkin penned in Cyrillic and we had it all right here!

But we've done enough as it is...!

Next!

======================================

How best to wrap up something so revelatory as this - hmm?

Well, we can ramble on and on about the myriad theories about an hypothetical end of the world to be found in all cultures, throughout all time, in every corner of the globe...

Maybe we should focus on the signs, which can be anything and everything. For there are numerous signs that the end is near, assuredly...

Here's one: on that same ticker, there was something about a Kelly. Not Grace Kelly, not Chris Kelly, not Kelly Clarkson or Kelly Osbourne, no - not any of the previously famous Kellys, not at all. This one is COOL. This one is Kelly Oxford and she's "hit the jackpot" simply because she's in sync with the times which are sorely lacking in laughs and overindulging in voyeurism at the exact same time, quite paradoxically enough... But that's another story.

K.O. (she hit the jackpot in initials too) is deemed to be some sort of "internet pioneer" since she started wasting vast amounts of time on the web as early as 1997. It was a natural progression for her, from her youthful obsession with CB radios, she says. Okay...

GeoCities (argh, not that accursed name again) was her playground - but not her exclusive playground, not at all. At 18, she was quite the party animal and had already tallied up "years of partying" and enjoying a fake ID to go everywhere deemed trendy... So much for the image conjured up by what an internet pioneer should be, eh? But never mind that now: girrrls will be girrrls and all that jazz...

She evolved on the net, as in real life. She matured, got her act together (or cleaned it up, as she says; in Calgary, of all places...) offline just as she went from miserable GeoCities to cooler-than-cool Twitter and Tumblr and, just like that, she garnered a steady following that has grown exponentially ever since! Because the masses love to peep into others' lives: and they love to laugh, too!

And so, a social butterfly of the web suddenly is rewarded for sharing jokes on tweets less than 140 characters-per-shot: rewarded with celebrity fans/followers, a script deal "with a major U.S. network" (CBS) and a book deal too (which will be, like, extended tweets in the form of "narrative essays" about the exact same subject matter) not to mention celebrity, fame and glory all her own. Not only that - on her Twitter page, she defines herself as "designed to make you feel like everything is going well." And then she states that she is our Perestroika! Very telling; very revealing indeed...

This is not a case of "only in America" folks - this is one of the signs!

She is Canadian, anyhow, not American (born an Edmonton wild girl, reformed early enough in rival town Calgary -Flames fans will be happy- where she got married, gave birth three times and became what she is now) so this is definitely not an example of that hackneyed "American Dream" everyone keeps hoping to come into effect in their own lives and change everything for the very best at some point in time...!

There must be something in The Good Book about this sort of thing: when everyone will be so prone to share everything, losing every last shred of that sense of privacy and what would be sacred as opposed to what is not. And this generation of bare-all-souls is passing this on to their offspring already - even if they didn't inculcate, it's in the genes now.

Revealing all - that is what this Facebook society has gotten to. And for some of those exhibitionists of the web, the wittiest ones, it will pay off immensely. There is something awfully odd about that and it can only mean one thing: society, at least as we know it, has reached a breaking point. A point where nothing is private anymore. And that cannot be right, surely...?

Unless the script and book deals make it right, hmm?
It remains odd though that the only thing that will be deemed too indecent to reveal anywhere, through any electronic means whatsoever, will be the pay off here...

Not that she'll be literally rolling in gold, at all, folks - she'll be getting Monopoly (TM) money, like everyone else...

But enough rambling already!

R.I.B. - Ramblings In Brief - Fifth Estate Edition

2012-01-13T14:05:00.000-08:00

R.I.B. - Fourth Time's The True Charm

2012-01-05T19:20:00.000-08:00

Too many annoyances out there - too much crap all over the place - to promptly attend to, really... And why bother dealing with any of it in depth either? Thus, we chose to adopt the expeditive and most efficient method, permanently: blast it all to pieces piece by piece, take no prisoners, spare no one! But doing so in a less painful way, with little doses at a time! Now don't get us wrong here: in doing so, we do not hope that it will be less painful for everyone involved - at all! Au contraire, we hope it will sting, stab, bite and burn even more furiously since none of these topics (with one glaring exception now and then, really - but, to be honest, there are so few of those it makes one want to cry, really...! But that is another story.) hence, none of these stories deserved or was dignified with a full post to call its own anywhere else on the TLB Prime Network - at blogging time, that is!

So here we go again...
MORE R.I.B. - RAMBLINGS IN BRIEF!

=====================================================

Laval (one half of Culbec... Quawbeck... Québec's very own God-forsaken version of Sodom & Gomorrah...) is likening itself to Horseman-country these days...

Oh really now - we are horseman-country all of a sudden?

I don't remember seeing Ric Flair, Arn Anderson, Tully Blanchard and J.J. Dillon galloping around these parts when I was around said forlorn parts, lo, those many years ago, pal...?

I never heard of any legendary quatuor of guys on the Rouge Et Or gridiron daring to pretend to be unstoppable, merciless "Four Horsemen"...?

I never even saw a single horse in all of Laval!
Not even on the rare treks out to le Centre de la Nature...

So, why in blue blazes would the turgid town of Laval be anything remotely like "horseman-country" nowadays?

Because of local boy turned promoter Normand Latourelle and his Cavalia - that's the only possible reason now!

Sure, Latourelle is creative and I personally appreciate the lyricism he adds to his art through the simultaneous use of image, music and live artistic performance. Multi-media is the future and until the day we can add holograms to that mixture, Latourelle and his peeps are the ones who do the most out of it all indeed.

I loved the Light show on Parliament Hill (Mosaika) - and he is behind that. The Cirque du Soleil has been something else, innovative, fresh, since its very beginning - and Latourelle was there at the beginning of that adventure, too. Cavalia is magical in its own way, and so is Odysseo, which is even more equestrian in nature than the former show!

But a horse - as the face of Laval?
That's too much - and an insult to all equines out there!

The horse is as out-of-place in the slums of Laval as the name Latourelle was - the latter being a typically French from France name that should have probably never have come to North America in the first place - but that is all due to the bigger Historical Mistake that was la Nouvelle-France in the first place - let's not get into that here now...!

Laval deserves a rat as its face - or something like that!
A stray cat - it has so many!
But not a noble beast like the horse - never!

Next!

=================================================

After Canada-bashing (more specifically Culbec... er, Quawbeck... er, Québec-bashing, yeah! But I kinda need to "think big" this time and take the whole piece of wasteland as a whole, though a fractured whole it may be - maybe - thanks to the efforts of a small -and getting smaller with each passing day- group of separatists themselves split up in-between several factions such as the BQ, PQ and now the ridiculous-sounding CAQ -LMBO- but that is another sad story to bash later on... When we have nothing else to bash... er, do.)

Sooooooo... after Canada-bashing, let's go for the jugular of the largest piece of frigid wasteland there is on the damnable planet: Russia!

Russia won't give up on its sorry excuse for a space exploration program - one guesses that they are so eager to be able to start migrating to another place, any place, even another planet in order to escape Siberia and its surroundings without having to simply "defect to the west" - which is a defeat and dishonour, admitting in fact that the sworn enemy's pastures are indeed greener (which they are, even in winter, but that is besides the point right now...)

Russia, therefore, is wasting too much time, energy, space also not to mention money and technology with their prolonged space program - and going nowhere at all with it. That's beyond pathetic - that's downright sad.

The exclamation mark on all that is the return of Phobos-Grunt, the unmanned probe sent out quite some time ago in the hopes that it would hop onto Mars orbit after enough elliptical rounds and would be sending back info about that particular moon of our neighbour planet (I guess Deimos is not good -or bad, lest I say devious- enough for our former comrades there...? Hey - it is Deimos after all! Ask the Warlord about it... But we are digressing again - big time!)

Phobos-Grunt is about to meet an ignominious end indeed, as reported by the abc.com journalists Ned Potter (no relation to Harry - ha - easy one, I know) and Gina Sunseri - right here.

Why not embed though, for what it's worth: the video of the report -maybe even two, three or an entire series of reports- that may still be viewable right here for some time to come yet...? Here it goes:

video platform video management video solutions video player

Commercials included - wow. Thanks, abc! Sometimes life can be... a little uncomfortable indeed. Tis so true. I just had to go myself, a mere moment ago - thanks for making it easier to go. (Thanks abc - still - not Dulcolax!)

There went nothing - indeed.

But back to our scheduled ramblings now...

So, as we were saying, as Phobos-Grunt grunts it out (another easy one - I know.) and goes it out with a whimper, scientists and assorted experts in the field just hope that they are right and that the astronomical (pun fully intended - duh) amounts of toxic fuel in its tanks will burn up in the upper atmosphere upon re-entry...

Once again it's the poor Indian Ocean that is set to receive the big chunk of crap from outer space - with all the unholy, ghastly cosmic germs that it might have collected wherever it may have roamed...! The Indian Ocean was forced to swallow similar crap in October when the German ROSAT space telescope "scattered debris" into it -and, personally, it is not surprising to me that a ROSAT would just scattered debris, not accomplish much at all, be totally unhelpful and then disappear: it's just like the ROSATs I know to be that way! But that is another story- and so... poor Indian Ocean, again; it only took a two-month break before it has to get it again?!? Not fair - there are five oceans, all equal in the Eyes of God, the only pair of eyes that matters - right?

Well, okay, fine - it was the Pacific's turn to swallow crappy space junk back in September when the U.S.' own NASA UARS space satellite sent debris down - thanks NASA UARS! (Proof positive -or negative, really- that you can be American, live the American Dream and still come crashing back down to earth and fail miserably! God Blessed America!)

Experts only hope it misses their precious Florida this time around (one of the slightly, extremely remote possible sites of crashing.) Don't worry - oranges are safe. As they repeat ad nauseam, the seas cover up three-quarters of the earth, and so the odds are re-entry of the piece of space junk and therefore its crashing will be at sea indeed. Let the fishies get it - again. Damn surface-dwelling shitty space explorers...!

This Phobos-Grunt fiasco is all about the proper planet alignment - again! But it has little to do with that alignment abundantly spoken about as 2012 drew nearer and nearer - thank God! Still - the space exploration obsession can be dubbed to be as crazy as anything else of the sort: especially in the light of it going nowhere and not even fast at that but slow - ever so painfully slow...!

Phobos-Grunt (argh - what an annoying name! But we are learning Russian without even noticing, here! For "grunt" is the Russian word for ground; not the same meaning at all that it has in English, see? Still makes me want to grunt...) is the 19th failure of the kind... Aye, folks: Russians are 0 for 19 in these attempts to reach, probe, research Mars and poke Martians. While Americans completely ignored the old adage that has curiosity killing the cat and dispatched their cool cat of a probe called Opportunity, a rover that latched onto Mars in 2004 very successfully. And, now, they are set to launch another one this time to be called... Curiosity.

"Truly a travesty for the exploration of space," said Charles Vick, who follows Russian space efforts for GlobalSecurity.org, "A loss for all concerned."

Vick was interviewed by abc over all this waste of resources and is convinced that it was a lack of funds halted the Russians from properly testing the spacecraft launched as well as maintaining a proper level of quality control. They even dare say that "the worst damage was to Russian pride." What...? What about the polluted oceans, risks of contaminations and further desecration of our oceans, huh? Allegedly none of these concerns Roscosmos chief, Vladimir Popovkin, who supposedly "went so far as to suggest that someone had sabotaged the probe" - making the case for Russian pride being the real and perhaps sole casualty here. It would not be beneath Americans, sure, but...

Popovkin was so mellow in his accusations though: he stated that "it would not be desirable to accuse anybody, but today there are very powerful means of influence for space vehicles which cannot be excluded," in an interview with the Russian daily Izvestia, subsequently translated by ABC News. Popovkin gave no specifics, didn't even sound irate over the 19th failure - if it's not taking its toll on him, why bother advancing a theory of sabotage at this time...? All it did was create a lack of cooperation - as "sources say the U.S. government, mildly offended, stopped helping the Russians track their errant probe in its final days." Could this be the dawn of a new cold war? A space age stone cold war over not-much-of-anything-at-all! Way to make your mark, Popovkin! Makes me think of a Popo I know... But that is another story too!

Roscosmos, the Russian space agency, has no choice to swallow this one up - again. Just like the Indian Ocean has no choice. (Hey, if I was one of the fishies in the Indian Ocean, I'd get a class action suit going against the damn Roscosmos! Inept space explorers! Pigs In Space would do a better job than you guys - sheesh! But that is just supposition - just like any sabotage talk is...)

Roscosmos is, in fact, quite apologetic about this latest debacle and reassures that "most of this debris coming back down to Earth will burn up in the atmosphere, but 20 to 30 chunks of charred debris, weighing about 450 lbs., could make it to the surface" - whcih, again, should be the sea, not terra firma and therefore not the top of your head or the roof over it. Just where precisely it might actually crash will not be crystal clear until just a few hours before impact: indeed, technology is that good it can only warn us until it actually happens.

That's just great.

The world's space agencies are all reassuring in unison though: they all agreed that any one person's chances of getting hit by debris are tiny -- something like 1 in 20 trillion, based on the spacecraft's orbit and the amount of debris that might survive re-entry. Thus, the chances that, out of the seven billion people on Earth, one of them -you, maybe- somewhere, could be hit are more like 1 in 3,000.

That's still better odds than winning the lottery - a lot better.

(And remember that, if this one doesn't get you, the next one might - the Earth's orbit is cluttered with all kinds of space junk that we, collectively, as the space exploring human race, sent up there, with gusto. And then there's asteroids, comets, spaceballs and other unidentified objects for which we have no safety net at all. Maybe the odds are up to 1 in 300 now?)

With these reassuring numbers - let's just move on!

Next!

==============================================

Back to Canada-bashing, in closing...
And right back to the infernal germ-infested suburbs of Laval...!

Each and every year, there are rankings compiled and made public as they are published in the favored and reputed magazine for Canadians to read - MacLean's Magazine.

Perplexing it is, each and every year, to note that the rankings change ever so-slightly, like nothing evolves (or de-evolves for that matter).

Also perplexing is the fact that troglodytes in townships such as Laval still cannot spell MacLean's right... (they think it is McClean's - and this comes from budding but approved journalists working for the great, mighty Quebecor! Granted they are toiling on writing copy for little freebies such as the Courrier Laval and the like - but still! Can PKP possibly be happy with such twits? Can I possibly give a flying hoot about that? So - let's move on!)

Most perplexing it is to see such disparate numbers - like, how can Laval be 40th in "violent crime" (good show, Lavallois - good show!) but 63rd overall out of 100 cities? Slacking up on the theft, shoplifting and assorted misdemeanor category, guys? But pretty violent nonetheless - great!

Laval is one of those places that is both benefiting and suffering badly from its proximity to another big (bigger, really) slum-urban-commune (hey - they used to call "la communauté urbaine de Montréal" - okay? Not me - them!)

All of the creeps who start finding it to be "too hot" in Montreal, go north - immediately north (by northwest) is the inviting not-so-virginal, ripe to consume territory of Laval - where crime can flourish! The Clouseaus there are as clumsy as their famed French counterpart, see? And the most inept at Scotland Yard would be a genius hailed by Holmes if he ever had the opportunity to work with the Laval clods! Good thing such a time travelling experience, crossing the barriers of fiction and reality as well, is totally impossible - it's a good thing for the character created by Sir Arthur, that is! But we're digressing once more...

As they migrate from Montreal to Laval, the criminal element does not do the same once it also gets "too hot" in their new lavallois surroundings - no. Instead, they just play cat-and-mouse with the Laval police and start going from block to block, district to district, coming back to the first spot periodically because, well, because they can. There is no intrinsic need to go to another town further north - Laval has everything they need: all the customer-base they need, proximity to the other one, vastly profitable, over in Montreal; plus all the troops they might need as one or two of their foot soldiers eventually does spend some time "en dedans" - which is to say that the cops do finally make something "stick" -somehow, eventually- and do nab some of the acolytes, small-time crooks always, for periods of no more than a maximum of a few months at a time. And after that time is done, they're right back on the streets doing what they do... period.

Prince Georges, British Columbia is purported to be number one in the overall crime rate sweepstakes - not Toronto, not big town Vancouver right nextdoor, not Montréal... What is this sith? Is this rigged or something? Somebody at MacLean's has some gripe with Prince Georges - the luxury condo they wanted to buy there went to somebody else? All speculation here - no accusations!

Saskatoon, Winnipeg and Regina have the meanest streets, they say now. What the hell - the Sasquatch, Winnie The Pooh and Regina Spektor built their criminal empires while no one was looking, surpassing the true giants in the field, just like that?

And what of Edmonton? Just a mere few years ago it was number one - Canada's answer to Detroit in the USA! Just on the sorriest field, not in the car industry nor on the ice (NHL joke). How could it have improved so fast over there? Did the Calgary Hitmen come over and clean up the town or something? (Another hockey joke. Ha.)

Any top ten of "Canada's Most Dangerous Cities" that does not have Laval in the top ten or twenty (at least!) is blind to the truth - that is all that I have to say! Numbers don't lie, they say - and it is true that they don't. Alas, the numbers taken into consideration by MacLean's magazine do not reflect the entire truth as I was apt to witness it, circa 2006...

And things do not evolve for the best so rapidly in these matters - no way.

That last part was 100% serious, MacLean's!
Just to be clear...

Next time!

R.I.B. - Ramblings In Brief - The Genesis!

2011-12-12T07:59:00.000-08:00

R.I.B. - Ramblings In Brief - Triple Play!

2011-12-10T20:12:00.000-08:00

PATTI AUSTIN by Kalamka, Juba / Colorlines Magazine

And as for invectivating, for the record, I disagree strongly with the author of the following:

Greek/Latin Roots for Theological Terms II www.drbilllong.com/GrLaRoots/TheolII.html

5 May 2007 – There is one OED attestation of the verb invectivate to mean "to utter invectives," but I don't think it will have much life in the 21st century. ...

The verb invectivate will have quite the future in the 21st Century - because I plan to use it extremely, ah, vigorously if you get what I am screaming... in writ! And, in closing - I don't need your spell-checking services, Blogger!!! Thank you. But no thanks!)

Et maintenant - de retour à nos moutons;
and now back to our regular programming!

Thus, years later (is it the 25th anniversary, already? Has to be....) and especially since they are projecting a remake of it already (creativity-bankrupt Hollywood cannot come up with anything, anymore, so they will keep on ransacking everywhere else for potential movies to make, possible millions to rake in! That includes more comic-bookies adaptations that were ever conceivable before; remakes galore; all those umpteenth unnecessary sequels; greenlightings of the most lurid ideas, for so-called originality or vanity's sake really; adaptations of old material twisted all out of shape through a wretched and warped view of what modernization should be... But we digress right now - big time!) so, in the light of all this, why not try and push a so-called "collectors edition" of the first film, with director and lead actor commentary, at this most money-wise of times...!

Some have likened the endeavour of putting Verhoeven and Schwarzenegger together in a sound booth to review, scene by scene, their movie together, to be an instant comedy goldmine - and that is hardly disputable by the evidence right here:

Schwarzenegger is, basically, quite the big goof - how did this guy ever get elected Governator is beyond me. Sure, for some unstable minds out there, "larger than life" is the description that supersedes "big goof" when it comes to describing Ah-nold: but come on, face the evidence! Just the guy's laugh makes you cringe - and it is not in intimidation...!

Wish they had gotten Sharon Stone's commentary too: always wanted to know what she thought about that divorce scene there...

Or of her usage by Verhoeven in this and that other film too...!
But that is another story - a smutty story - not for this blog!

Paul & Ah-nold, though - you have to listen to it to believe it!
Hope they collaborate again - soon!
Maybe on "The Expendables: Armageddon" or something...?

;-)

R.I.B. - I've got 2 words for ya... Ok, maybe three...

2011-11-26T07:06:00.001-08:00

Too many annoyances out there - too much crap all over the place - to promptly attend to, really... And why bother dealing with any of it in depth either? Thus, we chose to adopt the expeditive and most efficient method, permanently: blast it all to pieces piece by piece, take no prisoners, spare no one! But doing so in a less painful way, with little doses at a time! Now don't get us wrong here: in doing so, we do not hope that it will be less painful for everyone involved - at all! Au contraire, we hope it will sting, stab, bite and burn even more furiously since none of these topics (with one glaring exception now and then, really - but, to be honest, there are so few of those it makes one want to cry, really...! But that is another story.) hence, none of these stories deserved or was dignified with a full post to call its own anywhere else on the TLB Prime Network - at blogging time, that is!

So here we go again...
MORE R.I.B. - RAMBLINGS IN BRIEF!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Let's start with two words
BLACK FRIDAY.

Maybe three words will b more descriptive indeed, so here goes:
Black Friday Frenzy!

The appellation of "Black Friday" is such an odd choice for the "event" that marks, in effect, the beginning of the Holiday shopping season. Nudged in-between Thanksgiving and the entire Holiday Season month, this day is always infamous for allowing Americans to show their truly ugly side...

Anything given the adjective and color "Black" (with the possible exception of Black Label) is always adjusted so in a pejorative, negative and utterly disgraceful way it seems. Didn't we have a Black Tuesday this year - or was it Black Thursday, last year? Although with Black Friday, it was not the aim at all - it becomes so with each and every year, inexorably and irrevocably so...

For the unsightly side of American consumerism and its definition of "the most wonderful time of the year" was once again evident this year - people were shot in the parking lots of cheap bon marché discount chain stores, because they got the goods on sale at such an incredible price that they made others envious enough to pull out a gun and steal the aforementioned goods from them!

Man alive - I mean, Wal-Mart, Target an K-Mart: these places have merchandise that I would not even want if they were GIVEN AWAY FOR FREE...! And yet, some Ugly Americans are willing to shoot their fellow Americans DEAD (the first faithful customer shot in a parking lot, a man from California, is in critical condition at blogging time) in order to get their hands on said merchandise CRAP.

UNBELIEVABLE.

They even shot a woman outside a Wal-Mart in South Carolina - the robbery attempt was less successful there: she was only superficially wounded. (Which means that the creep or creeps waiting in the parking lot had poor aim on top of their poor taste.)

There was a veritable shoot-out in a MALL in Fayetteville, North Carolina - the police reported several gunshots between shoppers there. Yikes! I can imagine the crazy scene: one shopper pulls out a gun first and says to another: "hand over that rice cooker, mister - hand it over NOW!" The swift reply: "hey, I paid the lowest price EVER for it and it is MINE!" and he promptly pulls out his own gun then! Shooting commences - the shop-til-you-drop (literally) crazies take refuge behind shopping carts and in the trench between cash one and two, respectively! Another customer seizes the opportunity amidst the prevalent chaos, grabs the rice cooker and runs away with it - they start shooting at him immediately (of course) but he is not acting alone: his buddies were waiting at cash four. And bullets abound.

SWEET GOD - THIS IS LIKE A SCENE FROM ANY ONE OF QUENTIN'S MOVIES HERE!!!
And the most frightening thing, the most terrible and terrifying thing indeed is that it is NOT A MOVIE - IT IS REAL!

What's next - a mob made up of grannies without enough dough going after the housewives and single mothers gangs after the latter have ransacked the supermarket on their weekly binge?

Now THAT will be bloody...

Next!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

In other black news this past week...
(And we're months removed from Black History Month - imagine that!)

Black Peter gets Sinterklaas' boot right on his, er, charcoal behind - and is OUT of the parade!
(Is this, by any chance, the Black Parade some young WHITE turks were singing about, not-too-long ago? No? Just asking...)

Black Peter, a character originating from the Dutch history books and embodying the fate of the bad kids, each and every year during the Holiday season festivities, does not cut it anymore in our P.C. era; despite some attempts at P.R. in the recent past making him out to be "no more, no less" than a Sinterklaas helper, life all the others... The fact is, he always stood out like a sore thumb...

In a sense, Black Peter suffered from the same basic handicap that has plagued the likes of Cleveland Indians' mascot, the Blackhawks of the NHL and the NFL's Pat Patriot - for his obvious resemblance with Paul Revere, of course. All are supposed to be bringing the masses together and bring some joy - but they often bring other feelings to the surface as well.

Originally named Zwarte Piet (back in the motherland, the Netherlands) the eventual Black Peter consisted of no more than blackface make-up worn by some local young turk who'd go without a job for the end of the year otherwise. This representation of the Black community reeks of silent film era shenanigans and vaudevillian tricks and it is deemed not only offensive but also absurd. It spreads onto the 21st Century racial stereotypes especially since the character was a dumb ruffian who beat children, spoke buffoonish Dutch and never rose to be more than a slave, for all his violent, abusive ways...! According to the Dutch tradition, Black Peter is responsible for carrying a book full of the names of naughty children, along with a rod and a sack to take the bad children away. He also scatters candy for children. - wow, Sinterklaas sure knows how to pick his helpers, in Dutchland! And they seemed to make quite a fine team too, over the years... For, since 1985, the Dutch Sinterklaas was always flanked by Black Peter as he made his way towards New Westminster Quay aboard a paddle wheeler boat (Oh my - we're talking archaic, indeed! I've got doodles and scrapbooks older than 1985 - but never mind that now! 1985 is ANCIENT! Organizers of this event are right: not only is "Black Peter" old and degrading - it is totally out of touch with MODERN SOCIETY! Ditch the dude already! Enough said...?) No more of that, it would seem...

The Dutch community is relieved - no more racism will be found marring the holiday spirit there! Sint Nicolaas is, at last, saintly again! The children can approach him again and play with him, sing with him, be gifted by him... There's always the risk, as with every other Santa, any given Holiday season, that the guy hired to don the suit might be a pedophile - but that is far less degrading than that Black Peter business, which was indeed a black eye on the entire organization - literally!

In other news, Black Lightning got the boot from the JLA too - they don't even want green in that outfit anymore (Green Arrow, Martian Manhunter) why would they want a guy with an afro who thinks he's a Mulato Zeus, eh?

And Black Canary is out of the Birds of Prey too - since that one made everyone chuckle the moment they stopped to just think about it for five small seconds... (A Canary - a Bird of Prey? How about inviting Tweety Bird to join the group too, then? Bwah-ha-ha.)

And no more Black Tom in the X-Men universe either - why, with all the oddball characters and weirdos with strange, queer, bizarre, all-around improbable and impossible mutations that there are there, why bother with a powerless svengali who can't do squat (but raise controversy, that is), HMM?

Oh, yeah -
Read more: http://www.vancouversun.com/life/Black+Peter+gets+boot+from+Sinterklaas+parade/5772196/story.html#ixzz1eqRbDdpf

Since, for the second straight time, as we copied and pasted but a passage from the source article onto here, the basic URL came with it (out of nowhere) along with the all-important message "read more:" - pointing at the source with an exclamation mark, really. Wow - with such tactics to protect what is theirs by right, one wonders how Vancouver lost the Stanley Cup in such one-sided fashion...?

Oh yeah - it wasn't theirs, at all. They and, most of all, their inane fanbase thought that it was theirs by right, but the Cup belonged to the better team that had had such a consistent and self-assured rise to the top in the past five years: the Boston Bruins. (And as I type this, I am wearing my Bruins jersey, yeah: my customized jersey, if I may precise! But that is another story, too...)

That URL pleading to go back to the original article dispensing merely the facts - minus any witty socio-politico-commentary as you get plenty of HERE - is really biting, burning or bruising my butt though: for it needn't be so insisting, you know? And so unsightly long either... Don't they know, those neanderthals or Canuck Cromagnon back there under the Vancouver Sun, that an hyperlink fits anywhere, unlike the URL of any given link especially one of their myriad articles to appear in their rag? Sheesh... And you hope to attract the readers' sympathy to your cause?

But let's just move on already...

Next!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Well, speaking of which... And since it falls in, sits in well, with all this "black" business here...

My Boston Bruins customized jersey!

In order to purchase it, I did not follow any adage, old saying, legendary publicity the likes of "real men wear black" - because that is a total and utter lie!

Did Samson wear black?
Did Jesus?

Although I was tempted to go with the black one, for several reasons - the Boston Bruins, being the road team that night, would have, normally, worn their black road uniforms to defeat the Vancouver Canucks 4-0 and hoist the Stanley Cup - triggering the infamous riots and starting a summer-long party back in Boston; but all that is another story, of course!

The fact is, though, the Boston Bruins were wearing their WHITE uniforms on that championship, glorious night!

Now, white will get dirtier much faster than black - especially if you're bloodied or busy bloodying your opponent - we all know that! But, I am sure, it is an acceptable price to pay in order to look so damn GOOD!

The traditional 'Big Bad Bruins' image -and reputation of being nothing more than a bunch of goons or thugs on skates - comes emblemized with the black & gold colors. No other team has ever been so associated with violence than the Boston Bruins due to this - since the good guys usually wear white and the bad guys, black - it is a no-brainer for traditionalists.

But, you see nowadays, we are in the era of political correctness indeed.

Black is no longer associated with any of this hogwash - and neither should white, since it gets dirtier faster. (But that is another story here, once again, taking us where we don't want to be right now or ever! So we'll stop digressing already!)

I chose to have my customized jersey white - the HOME TEAM color.
The symbol of PURITY too - but not necessarily pertaining to the subject here or applicable to it in any way, really...!

I chose to have my own name on the back of it - not any player's name because I love the town, the team's history of hard-working, play fair collective bunch of guys - but I do not want to get attached to any potential mercenary-to-be who will sell his soul and play for the arch-nemesis (although that is extremely improbable here: I mean, the damn Habs are definitely not the money moguls that the damn Yanks are!) on the very first chance he gets to crack the bank...!

And I chose to have my year of birth as my number - what else?

Therefore I assure myself of two things:
no rival will ever get away with anything against me because the urge to use, misuse or abuse my name will overcome him the moment my team is pounding on his wretched team on any given day, in any given arena, sports bar, etc...

And secondly (and most importantly, in truth) - my luminous jersey (hey, it's white: it is luminous!) is indeed UNIQUE an there isn't any other like it IN THE WORLD.

Woooooooooo!
Go Bruins, Go!
+++

What a fine, positive ending
to such a b... er, dark ranting, eh...!

R.I.B. - Ramblings In Brief - Redux!

2011-11-18T21:55:00.000-08:00

Too many annoyances out there - too much crap all over the place - to promptly attend to, really... And why bother dealing with any of it in depth either? Thus, we chose to adopt the expeditive and most efficient method, permanently: blast it all to pieces piece by piece, take no prisoners, spare no one! But doing so in a less painful way, with little doses at a time! Now don't get us wrong here: in doing so, we do not hope that it will be less painful for everyone involved - at all! Au contraire, we hope it will sting, stab, bite and burn even more furiously since none of these topics (with one glaring exception now and then, really - but, to be honest, there are so few of those it makes one want to cry, really...! But that is another story.) hence, none of these stories deserved or was dignified with a full post to call its own anywhere else on the TLB Prime Network - at blogging time, that is!

Hence, here we go again...

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

So what's that latest genial tip that the fine folks from Flare have given us all now - what's that? "Don't wash your jeans - freeze them!" FREEZE? And they are serious too...

Denim retailers from Levi's to Gap want you to stop washing your jeans after every wear. Ultimately, the more you wash, the more water you waste and the more your denim will fade. To benefit the planet and your wallet, freeze your jeans instead. By slipping your pants into a plastic bag and tossing them in the freezer for a night or two, you can kill odour causing bacteria, preserve your worn-in fit, and maintain the colour so that they'll look brand new way longer. Plus, you will end up doing laundry less frequently. Time for a bigger freezer.

Watch Now: How to freeze your jeans by the Gap

Brought to you by... Yahoo! In collaboration with Flare and Shine. Just call them The Three Stooges of Modern Living already. But wait - Gap is involved too. Gap 1969! (Why did it have to be 1969 - sigh - why?) So I guess it really is the Four Marx Brothers of Odd Ideas here...!

But enough about this...

Next!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

There is this campaign going in good ol'Culbec - a whole campaign featuring all imaginable local "stars" in the most simple attire, dans le plus simple apanage therefore...!

The slogan used is "underneath, we are all the same" - and, as with everything else in Culbec that is meant to have a real impact, it is a bilingual campaign of course, one that states that "en dessous, on est tous pareils" for their local rabble to be reminded of that...

Centraide is behind this massive injection of porn into the collective - porn for a good cause, sure, but porn it still is...! I mean, look at the facts: here (and there's even more here!)

As they call it, mostly to sound vain and self-grandiloquent, "le Grand Montréal" (meaning, in truth, just the greater area of that vastly polluted oversized township floating on a utterly polluted body of water no longer fit to be called a "river") calls the population to give, give generously, to all the needy, all the poor that there are in the area... And so, just to stir everyone into donate large sums of cash asap, they went out and gained the participation of a whole bunch of second-rate "stars" (they may be top notch in Culbec - but that only means second banana material everywhere else) to donate their time and sacrifice their dignity by shedding their clothes for this... One supposes that is all they donated, since there is no evidence of anything else, and that it wasn't hard at all for the majority of them to get butt naked in the public eye since several of them do so routinely already...! But that is another story or another bunch of sordid stories...

It doesn't get much more sordid than this though: look at this particular shot right here:

These are two sisters there: Mitsou, Culbec's own version of Mad-Onna (lest it is Cicciolina) turned magazine editor an TV hostess, with her troubled young sibling, Abeille Gélinas, lamented forer VJ at MusiquePoche, er, MusiquePluche, er, voyons, MusiquePlus yeah - the township's cheap version of MTV. Both sisters are butt naked here, in a togetherness evocative of the time when those twins were doing Hammer films together in the 70s or the time when Shannon Tweed brought her younger sis along for a Playboy photoshoot in the early 90s... Or how about the time Penelope Cruz made out with her own sister in a video directed by their brother - just to help out the kid bro gain some instant notoriety? All good causes right there, right? Only such things could bring two sisters so close...!

In other shots - the bereaved Joannie Rochette loks just sad enough on her pic - she takes after Sylvie Fréchette in a tradition of Olympic athletes hailing from Culbec that compete no matter what tragedy befalls them... But Syivie never disrobed so soon after - or ever, in fact - after the fact!

The whole local band called Simple Plan took everything off for this campaign, too - talk about standing united! Did they ever see their inspiration, the great U.K. outfit Simple Minds, do anything like this, though? Granted, some of the Simple Minds band members didn't live long enough to see such an, er, opportunity come their way... The surviving ones, and the replacements, were much too British, I guess: no sex please, we're British - right? Right...

Absent from this campaign -and, as they would say, brillant, incandescent, resplendissant par leur absence- are several punks whose style, demeanor, candor an all-around "punkiness" truly made this sort of thing quite simply perfect for them! So, why did they not participate? Why were they not invited to take part in this nakedfest for a gooder-than-good cause?!? We are thinking, most specifically here, of loudmouth Guy A. Lepage, so-called comedian Mike Ward and several politicians maybe...? (Anyone who ever wondered what Pauline Marois looks like unclothed raise your hand - HAND I said!)

Sure, the sight of these punks with no clothes on would have been quite traumatic - and people would have developed an aversion toward Centraide rather than the opposite beneficial effect so desperately sought here...!

But then again - maybe it would have spurred on the masses to give loads of money - just in the hopes that they retire those shots from the myriad places that they have been assailing every innocent pair of eyes: in the subway, on the sides of buses, on several billboards across town...

No wonder Hugh Hefner is in trouble these days - he no longer has the monopoly on smuttiness... I mean, "tasteful nudity", right...

Next!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Speaking of GUY A...

Recently there were rumours that he, his old cohorts from that wretched RBO clique and their former manager too, would all be getting to be the recipients of some sort of honorific emblem from their government - a medal or something...!

That boggles the mind - mais passons...

Guy A Lepage has had such a mean streak come out of him at all levels since he started manifesting himself to the masses: you wouldn't believe... If you think I'm mean, sometimes, what will you think of this guy -Guy- then? Let's look at a few highlights here...

On the radio, where RBO started out, anything was fair game. He would mercilessly make fun of everyone and anyone, as any true comedian would do, right? One of his favorite victims was Belgazou. Belgazou was the stage name (ou nom d'artiste) of some local singer who registered a string of hits while RBO were still trying to make a (nasty) reputation for themselves. Talk About It, "L'Accélérateur" and "Quitter Ton Île" were such songs that made Belgazou, née Diane Guérin, the Culbec precursor of Ke$ha, if you will... RBO, led by Guy A, could not stop making fun of Guérin's chosen nom d'artiste - they thought "Belgazou" just sounded so goofy that they couldn't let up mocking it!

Soon enough, Belgazou's career was over.

On the 10th anniversary of the now deemed to be a "phenomenon" RBO (which stands for Rock et Belles Oreilles - more than evidently based upon the French name of one Huckleberry Hound which was "Roquet Belles Oreilles" - now isn't THAT goofy, eh?) we saw Diane Guérin come out with a bouquet of all things (not a stink bomb) for Guy A... No hard feelings - good.

Guy A went on to do some TV with his RBO gang, a period of time during which they spoofed everything, everyone and did so mercilessly as without one iota of discrimination either. Guy A shone through mostly with his portrayal of the amalgamatuon of a generic super-hero type (say, Superman) and the Lord of lords Himself, Jesus-Christ. Once again, the simplest name was given to the concept: "Super-Jésus". I won't link that up here: if you want to peek at it, you look for it on YouTube or somewhere else...!

Also during that period, near the end of it really, the group was given the momentous task to helm the year-end special mimicking the SRC Bye Bye tradition: they would, ironically, do some Bye Bye shows of their own in later years. But that particular one, the first such experience of the kind for them, was done for the defunct network TQS - is it any wonder it is a defunct network now? In it, the group had the brilliant idea to spoof the separatist Parti Québécois and Bloc Québécois into a nazi-type of oppression that had politician Lucien Bouchard rethink his political aspirations, career and heck, even agenda!

No one, absolutely no one thought it was funny. In poor taste, yes - extreme poor taste - that was unanimous. But funny? Not a chance.

Perhaps due to their lack of funny bone, the band disbanded. RBO is indeed gifted but only for biting satire and that can be done by anyone - even Ann Coulter. They are not endowed with genuine funny bones, in the sense that Jerry Lewis gave to the expression. One of them went on to do some commercials, being some sort of Jon Lovitz or Leslie Nielsen of Culbec. Another went on to direct - given that chance by his connections. Another still went right back to radio. Guy A went on to try and be the Jay Leno of Culbec television. And he was given that chance by nothing less than the SRC, la Société Radio-Canada, clearly desperate to reconnect with the people and stop being perceived as an elitist. The SRC homegrown talent (Patrice L'Écuyer - that's it) was given a talk-show of his own once upon a time - but it simply failed to attract any viewership. Guy A, through his sheer controversial style, does manage so much, at least. Guy A chose an openly gay co-host, in order to be deemed to be "a good guy after all". And he accepts, unlike two former members, to reunite periodically with his former cohorts of RBO for joint projects, giving a chance to the other three guys to make some extra cash, as they were not so fortunate to land what Guy A landed, somehow...

On that show that he has on the SRC (only once a week, every Sunday night to boot - that is the closest that he can get to be the Culbec version of Jay Leno - and he needs a lead-in show featuring a CGI host that used to be a puppet: Gérard D. Laflaque) Guy A has shown himself to be less than a good guy though. And, on occasion, he even shows himself to be quite the jerk. Even foreign guests have noticed that: one notable, hailing from France, stated after his experience on the show that he now understood what the "A" stood for... Guy A once invited former singing star Chantal Pary, expressly to embarrass her with questions about her remarriage with a much younger, obviously gay, chubby, would-be singing star guy... Also on his agenda were questions about the time she got caught shoplifting. Had she not been caught giving in to her compulsive kleptomania, she would not have been invited to the show. What does Guy A care about former stars and what they may be doing now, if it isn't good enough to embarrass in front of his viewers? Said viewerbase is diminished every Sunday though, as the rival TVA chose Sunday to have broadcast their reality-TV crap called "Occupation Double" - and, this time, they burst their budget and went out to Europe, setting up their contestants in Portugal (which is paradise, weather-wise, compared to Culbec and Canada overall...) helping out a country in economical turmoil by the same token - not that Portugal really needs that kind of help... But that is another story.

Guy A likes to humiliate, basically - it is in his nature, no matter what he tries to say or do.

And it was never more evident than when he made a statement during his acceptance of that medal he got - whatever it was.

Fact is, whatever it may be, it does come from the government of Culbec - and so, it champions the use of the French language (le joual, really - but that is another story too) and Guy A felt like showing off a bit then...

Guy A claimed that he was appalled by any commerce that did not serve its clients in French. And he further stated that every single time he went into some business establishment and the personnel there approached him in English, he just turned tail and left. Not only that, he would then pull out his cell phone and rat on them to the august Office de la Protection de la Langue Française...!

Guy A - don't you realize that by revealing these details (if any of it is true, of course - and I am sure that the part where he gets approached in English is) you are in fact revealing, all at once, how execrable and lacking in notoriety you really are, in truth? Because, if you rat on them every time, you are like the nazi of service - YOU! Not Bouchard, not anyone else of the PQ or, coincidentally alos near-defunct BQ now...

And if they approach you in English, then it implies that they don't have any clue whatsoever who in blue blazes you are.

Now that is the honor that you truly deserve, Guy A.

And I tell you so here - IN ENGLISH.

;-)

Ramblings In Brief

2011-09-24T12:24:00.000-07:00

Too many annoyances out there - too much crap all over the place - to promptly attend to, really... And why bother dealing with any of it in depth either? Thus, we chose to adopt the expeditive and most efficient method, this time out: blast it all to pieces piece by piece! Now don't get us wrong here: in doing so, we do not hope that it will be less painful for everyone involved - at all! Au contraire, we hope it will sting, stab, bite and burn even more furiously since none of these topics (with one glaring blue exception, really, to be honest - blue with blond fur, these days) deserved or was dignified with a full post to call its own...

Here goes...

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I cannot believe that crummy Warner Bros company; they've partnered with Rocksteady to release an umpteenth game about Batty - featuring an umpteenth battle between Batty and the Joker (plus a few dozens of his cronies, of course.)

Sweet Lord Almighty - hasn't this crap been done to death already? Is that all you can ever conceive of, God-damn DC?!? Batty-Batty-Batty - you would be lost without Batty! Methinks, of course, that you are seriously batty in the head yourselves - all the powers-that-be at DC (the DC P-T-B S-O-Bs as I call them) and the fans such as this guy on YouTube that commented here so proudly that he actually fell for it and pre-ordered the lousy game just as DC wanted him to! Can you be any more sheepish, any more brain-washed... any more batty? No, you can't - the only thing worse than this sad, sorry, pathetic state is to be one of them Marvel Zombies; and we won't get into that now (not just yet, I should say...?)

Still, there is a glimmer of hope on the horizon (and a train heading towards the DC P-T-B S-O-Bs in their dark tunnel that they dug up for the Dark Knight to escape from the critics...!) - out of all the potential suckers for this latest batty entreprise, very few have actually bitten, heck even bothered to give any attention at all. YouTube "accounts" such as this one made up to promote Batty's latest gamey, usually attract much more attention than the puny 180,000 page views that it has gotten so far. Other such pages easily get two, three, five million views within the same timespan! Batty-attention is at an all-time low: and it is about time too! Maybe the pathetic DC P-T-B S-O-Bs will finally see the light and move away from mildew-laden caves, vampire bat-infested darkness an other such pseudo-gothic landscapes - and then they might finally review their entire catalog of characters and give several of them a chance, at long last!

But enough about this sith! (And I do mean SITH - for if Batty was a Star Wars character, he'd be a Sith alright! What a joy to see a Jedi decapitate him! What's good for Dracula is good for the "Caped Crusader" too! But I am digressing -and maundering- now...)

Next!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

What is this other crap now:

Forget about the Greeks, Portuguese, Irish and their ilk...

The situation is so bad in Europe;
even the Smurfs are revolting now...

We caught (up with - or just caught, really) one and here is what the little blue runt had to say for itself:

"I smurf - therefore I am!
And what does all this smurfing around do for me?
Nada! Zilch! Nothing at all!
Smurfland still gets no U.N. recognition!
We get a lousy americanized crappy movie treatment
complete with an unknown chick and a queer as co-stars!
The biggest talent was the guy cast as Gargamel, for smurfing out loud!!!
What is this smurfing crap?!?
The CGI was better done when it came time to give life to that infernal cat than to animate the comatose Papa Smurf of that Smurfette bitch...!
On top of that, talks are already underway for further censorship come the sequel: they say that a Purple Smurf Plague is too touchy because PSP invokes PMS is some weird smurfing way...!?! Arrrrrggghhhhh!!! We changed it already from the Black Smurf Plague (like you humans never had a Black Plague, noooooooo...) and now even the Color Purple is off limits? What is the smurf going on - who do you really fear will sue? Spielberg? PlayStationPortable Sony Gamer nerds? Who,WHO?!?
And speaking of Spielberg...
That creep gave life to E.T. and now he wants to make some sort of ballooned-up rubber version of TINTIN... WHY NOT US, STEVIE?!?
The Smurfs are not good enough for ya, you big smurfing goofball? Why did you let these morons handle our movie?!? All they did was the same smurfing shit that all the other guys have done with famed -or defamed- pop culture properties before: stuff them through an improbable space-time portal so that they land in... NEW YORK. Why does it ALWAYS have to be NEW YORK?!? Smurfs are smurfingly happy in their village! They do not want a noisy, polluted, infested with a million diseases metropolis where evil reigns!!! Gargamel likes New York - him and his darn cat! BUT NOT US - NOT THE SMURFS!!! And after this lousy smurfing flick, we have to put up with all the European constraints, austerity, a smurfing Euro, delayed entry into both the Union as the U.N. - ENOUGH!!!
You think you've had problems with some of your people hiding bombs in their headdress or something? Wait 'til the Smurfs get started! YOU'LL NEVER SEE US COMING - AND YOU'LL NEVER STOP A SINGLE ONE OF US BEFORE WE BLOW YOUR SORRY OVERSIZED SMURFING ASSES OUT OF OUR WAY!!!
Remember the queer's words in the movie: don't let yourself get fooled by our cutesy innocent smurfs!
No one stops the Smurfs - NO ONE!"

We've been notified, methinks...

Next!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

And what in blue blazes (er, perhaps I should rephrase that?) is going on HERE:

That silly daily rag and waste of paper Metro had some kind of passing fit of originality run through their veins - and it begat this:

2020 being too close, they thought that, in order to get really futuristic, they'd target 2030 as the ideal time in which budding journalists could truly get creative (for once) and imagine what might come to transpire eventually...

The usual drivel ensued: some cloning, some dreamed for (but never to come true) sports events, some senseless war between the United States and Canada... over water, nothing less!

And the worst thing is, this drivel got published, both online as on paper (an abridged version for the latter, mercifully - but still!)

Now, I was abroad when all this nonsense was happening and, had I been in one of the townships (!) that houses Metro, I would have surely participated in the sad process - if only to show them up in their pathetic lack of scope and imagination!

For they fail in every way: they keep the same celebrities in the limelight in their silly "20 years later" predictions... Even Alexandre Dumas had more going on (specifically more characters entering the fray) twenty years later than these morons! The most imaginative bit had Justin Trudeau becoming Prime Minister of Canada - but his counterpart in the U.S. was "President Sarah Palin!! How idiotic and unimaginative can you be to fail to recognize that this woman is but the flavour of the day and that she will be long forgotten and completely out of the spotlight if the world keeps turning another twenty years...?!? Of course, Canadians are dumb enough to elect Justin as P.M. - there is no doubt about that. And Americans have already proven how dumb they are, having elected Dubya TWICE. But anyone with half a brain knows that, if the USA elects a woman one day (on the eve of Armageddon, let's say...) it will either be a butch (Michelle Bachman) or a full-fledged dyke (Hilary) NOT A BIMBO LIKE PALIN! COME ON!!!

Other predictions were straight out of Buck Rogers and Flash Gordon - while most were eco-based (and quite sad) or simply geo-political wishful thinking...

Now if I had to have sent in a text - a brief newsflash sort of thing - it would have been something like THIS:

LONDON - At 7pm, Greenwich Mean Time, the established new order issued a statement through a committee specifically appointed for this task. The statement made clear that a New Earth is about to be established and that things will be extremely different from what they used to be.

In the statement, several demotions were announced as many pastors and self-appointed leaders were revealed to be no more than what classical liturgy refers to as "false prophets". More and more, each day, as this New Reign is established, it becomes increasingly clear which teaching was the True one and which course humanity is set to take at this all-important conjuncture in its history.

The new order has been in place since July of last year, when the Son of God Returned and put an end to a billion political careers and twice as many individuals' lives, all of which await Final Judgment in the core of the planet as documented by several news teams permitted to send in film crews with angelic escort.

The committee promised to issue further details when they are available.

Now do you think such morons as the Metro readers would even READ the whole piece through here...?!?

Do you think such a piece would have had a chance -a snowball's chance in hell- of winning ANYTHING, ANYTHING AT ALL in such a puny itty bitty "contest" - EH?!?

Two words: WHY BOTHER.

I'd rather post it here - publish it myself!

And see the comments flow in - comments I will not dignify with publication! Bwah-ha-ha: see if you like it when the tables have been turned, publeechers!

And that's enough rambling in writ - for now!

A Message To Atheistic America On 9/11... PART 1

2011-09-03T07:43:00.000-07:00

You morons who have vowed never to believe in a Story - The Greatest Story Ever Told - that involves a man made from dust, a woman made from his ribs, a snake possessed by a supernatural being into talking and tempting, a host of fallen godlings and an All-Mighty God Who Created it all...

You chose to believe in all the lies that a trio of simpletons such as Dubya, Dicky and Don-Don fed you?

You chose to buy into that silly -as too obvious- "axis of evil" crap that those three stooges served you up!

You chose to gobble up the "terror scare" bogus sith as well!

You chose to live in fear - with all five or six levels of "alert" to grade that fear (what were they again - red, terrorist hijackers are coming... yellow - terrorist bumblebees are coming... green - terrorist aardvarks are in your backyard, threatening the ever fragile eco-balance?)

You chose that fear over the fear of GOD - imagine that!!!

Was 9/11 more spectacular than The Great Flood, you think? More abrasive than Sodom & Gomorrha (the other twins to get burned big time) - do you seriously believe that?!?

Now that the 10th anniversary approaches - are you finally about to admit that YOU'VE BEEN HAD?

BIG TIME indeed!

What's that, you say?
You may have been duped by three klutzes - but at least you haven't been duped by organized religion?

GOD IS ABOVE ANY RELIGIOUS ORGANISATION ON EARTH, YOU MORONS!

YOUR COUNTRY PROFESSES THAT *IN GOD WE TRUST* - AND YET YOU ARE THE BIGGEST, MOST PROFOUNDLY SECULARISTS ON THE FACE OF THIS MUDBALL THAT THERE CAN BE FOUND...!

That makes you the biggest hypocrites of all, too.

*****************************************************

THIS HAS BEEN BUT PART ONE OF THIS MOST-DISTASTEFUL DIATRIBE...!
Stay tuned for part two... three... all the way to nine - or eleven!

Until then...
I've got three words for you:

FAHRENHEIT
NINE
ELEVEN

;-)

Maudit Sécularisme - Spécial En Français!

2011-03-12T18:52:00.001-08:00

J'arrive pas à croire ce qui est en train de se passer dans le coin perdu du SAGUENAY!

Les maudits athées qui vivent tant bien que (surtout trés) mal dans ces contrées perdues, damnées et malfamées, s'en prennent depuis des années (des décennies entières, semble-t-il!) à leur pauvre maire (enfin, pauvre dans le sens de la persécution de la chose; certes pas dans le sens des choses matérielles et encore moins de l'esprit!) qui, lui, ne veut que faire ses prières! On le comprend - un homme de sa trempe, se voir contré de rester dans tel lieu de perdition...! Shades of Lot in Sodom & Gomorrha! But I am digressing here...

Revenons à nos moutons, donc!

Le Saguenay: c'est pas gai!

C'est de mal en pire d'ailleurs, depuis quelques temps: car les forces malfaisantes du sécularisme bête et de l'athéisme régressif autant qu'oppressif (enfin, se veut-il l'être ou espère-t-il être ainsi!) croient avoir gagné du terrain à la cour du Tribunal des Droits de la Personne, rien de moins (non, mais, une petite seconde là: de quels droits parle-t-on ici, au juste? Du droit des gens d'être des imbéciles de premiére classe, celle qui fait appel aux avocats et aux lois fort discutables faites par des hommes extrêmement faillibles, au lieu des imbéciles de bas niveau, qui n'en font qu'à leur petites têtes et font fi de toutes les lois, par exemple? Enfin, passons outre ces détails...)

Or donc, le ti-tribunal aura donné raison aux plaignants idiotiques qui n'en peuvent plus d'entendre un Notre Pére ou un Je Vous Salue Marie prononcé avant des débats somme toute INDIGNES de telles prières! ET, pour ajouter insulte à injure, les plaignants bétas, enhardis de leur soi-disant statut de victorieux, exigent que le maire "fautif" se plie, bon gré, mal gré, à cette décision du tribunal de rien-du-tout (il le devient quand il donne voix aux malades mentaux dont la maladie est l'intolérance) non pas en dedans d'un délai raisonnable mais TOUT DE SUITE - OU EN DEDANS D'UNE SEULE PETITE SEMAINE, disent-ils... Les cons!

Plier l'échine devant pareille décision? UN CHRÉTIEN ferait pareille chose? UNE CHRÉTIEN de la même trempe que ceux qui bravèrent les maudits paîens lors des sanglantes Croisades? UN CHRÉTIEN qui, même s'il doit soi-disant tourner l'autre face pour qu'on la gifle aussi, COMBAT LE COMBAT DU JUSTE - parce que DIEU Est avec lui! TEL CHRÉTIEN ne baissera pas pavillon devant le ti-tribunal et ses décisions douteuses - JAMAIS!!!

Mais ne nous emportons pas maintenant...!

Cela fait longtemps, de fait, qu'ils reprochent au maire de faire la prière avant les débats de son conseil municipal (il en a fallu de la retenue pour que je ne tape "mini-céphal" plutôt, là - mais les cons auraient cru que je suis de leur côté en ce faisant et contre le maire; ce qui est, et c'est fort évident pour mon auditoire qui est intelligent ET lit le français, certes pas le cas! Notez que j'ai mentionné que le maire fait LA prière avant les débats - et non pas qu'il fait SES PRIÈRES...! Nuance...! Poursuivons...)

Que cette situation perdure autant qu'elle ne le fait devrait en convertir plus d'un satané séculariste car c'est là la preuve la plus claire qu'il peut en avoir - la preuve qu'il y en a Un, Dieu! Que le maire Jean Tremblay ait été maintes fois élu au sein de pareilles énergumènes qui ne savent même pas quelles sont les règles des lois mal-faites dont ils veuillent se servir afin d'étouffer la Foi dans leur ville de merde LE PROUVE DE FAÇON INCONTESTABLE! Elle l'est, une ville faite de merde, autant que tout endroit peut le devenir quand les nombres grandissants de pommes pourries deviennent bien plus considérables que ceux des pommes encore saines et recueillables! Le maire est, en effet, dans ce cas seulement et dans ce cas bien précis, exactement comme Lot au sein d'une Sodome Et Gommorrhe non-répentante et carrément ABSURDE! Car de dévouer tellement d'énergie, de temps et d'argent à une telle "anti-croisade" est carrément PATHÉTIQUE! Si ces gens en mal de causes justes et louables avaient consacré ne serait-ce que le tiers de leurs efforts ici investis dans une cause humanitaire, ils seraient de sitôt passés de CONARDS NOTOIRES au statut de PLUS GRANDS HÉROS MODERNES QUI PUISSENT ÊTRE! Ils seraient en lisse pour de multiples médailles! Ils finiraient dans Le Petit Robert ou Le Grand Larousse! Ils seraient respectés et même louangés (dans le sens non-religieux de l'expression!) au lieu de se voir mentionnés ici et ailleurs de la façon actuelle: en tant que CONARDS NOTOIRES (ou pire encore!)

CAR ILS AVAIENT L'EMBARRAS DU CHOIX: SAUVER LES BALEINES, LES PHOQUES, LES ENFANTS MAL-AIMÉS, SOUS-ALIMENTÉS, MAL-ÉLEVÉS (et Dieu Sait qu'il y en a UNE TONNE au CUL-BEC...) OU ENCORE STOPPER LA MAUDITE POLLUTION, LA MAUDITE DROGUE OU BIEN LA MAUDITE MACHINE (parlez-en à Octobre...)

MAIS...

Ils ont plutôt choisi de s'en prendre à un maire qui veut prier Dieu de lui donner la sagesse nécessaire afin de bien faire son travail - un maire qui veut garder quelques objets de piété dans son lieu de travail afin que celui-ci, et sa ville toute entiére, soient bénis - si possible...

ET IL DEVRAIT NON SEULEMENT TOUT ARRÊTER ÇA, ENLEVER LES OBJETS DE TOUT PARTOUT EN DEDANS D'UNE PETITE SEMAINE, MAIS AUSSI PAYER DES "DOMMAGES" ILLUSOIRES À CE CONARD D'YVES SIMONEAU ET AU MISÉRABLE MOUVEMENT LAÏQUE CUL-BÉQUOIS QUI SONT ÉVALUÉS À RIEN DE MOINS (mais potentiellement PLUS...?!? Si cela ne se fait pas "en dedans de une semaine" - je suppose!) QUE 30 000$...!!!

TRENTE MILLE DOLLARS!!!

Hé, Simoneau, si tu veux du cash VITE FAIT COMME ÇA, attends-toi à ce qu'il s'envole encore plus vite. Plus, en bonus, tu auras la malédiction de Dieu sur les épaules - chanceux! La même chose pour le pathétique mouvement laïque - et dire que je croyais les autres religions les ennemis, pas les "coliques de laïques"...! On aura tout vu... On ne supporte pas les priéres? Et les chants Grégoriens, cantiques de Noël et Petits Chanteurs du Mont-Royal - il faudrait les pourchasser, les poursuivre en justice eux aussi, alors! On ne peut plus voir un CRUCIFIX? On est peut-être devenu un vampire du jour au lendemain sans même s'en rendre compte - parbleu! Ou devrais-je dire (taper - écrire) "tabarouette" ou quelconque autre référence à vos infernales expressions blasphématoires typiques du SAGUENAY - HEIN?!?

Tout ceci est, en fait, à mourir de rire. La seule chose qui est plus RIDICULE aura été les centaines (j'espère que ce n'était pas des milliers, tout de même - des millions?!?) de fous furieux qui ont appelé LA POLICE DE MONTRÉAL afin de se plaindre que le travaillant défenseur des Bruins de Boston, Zdeno Chara, "DEVAIT" être puni pour avoir éliminer de son chemin l'obstacle pestilentiel qu'est Max Pacioretty (ce qui est un compliment pour Max - je le compare, presque, au grand Ken Linseman ou au encore plus grand Léo Labine en ce faisant! Mais, en passant, qui pour l'Amour du Bon Dieu baptiserait son premier-né du nom de "Max"?!? En tous cas...)

Au Q.G. de la LNH, on s'est bien moqué des partisans du CH ainsi que de la Police de Montréal pour avoir donné suite aux plaintes des CONcitoyens: la meilleure fût de prédire que la police de MTL va ensuite porter plainte contre la ville de Washington pour le vol des Expos!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Rira bien qui rira le dernier - et je parie sur le maire Jean Tremblay, QUI IRA EN APPEL DE LA DÉCISION DU TI-TRIBUNAL...

Et alors, "Me. Alarie", le maudit avocat du mouvement laïque, ravallera ses propos en ce qui a trait aux droits des personnes vis-à-vis ceux des municipalités...

Eh, Luc Alarie, une municipalité, c'est dirigé pour le PLUS GRAND BIEN DE TOUS CEUX QUI Y HABITENT, n'est-ce pas: et c'est pour votre plus grand bien que les Crucifix et prières sont là, conards! Vous en avez PLUS QUE BESOIN - mais vous ne les méritez même pas! Et un avocat tel qu'Alarie ne mérite qu'une place bien chaude et douillette - EN ENFER! JUSTE POUR AVOIR ÉTÉ TELLEMENT IMBÉCILE! Car tu tiens mordicus à défendre tes petits clients et leurs droits fondamentaux, n'est-ce pas mon petit Luc, tu y tiens tellement, tellement, tellement...! Tu y tiens tellement qur tu oublies qu'en ce faisant, tu brimes le droit fondamental de Jean Tremblay de prier Dieu de lui accorder la force, la sagesse et, surtout, la SAINTE PATIENCE afin de pouvoir bien faire son travail pour lequel DIEU, et non pas l'électorat, l'aura choisi...!

Alarie et les laïques pathétiques, eux, font extrêmement mal usage des talents qui leur ont été conférés par le Tout-Puissant.

Quant à moi - j'ose croire que je viens de faire un excellent usage d'un des talents que Dieu m'a conféré...!
AMEN!

Sempre Por O Melhor
LP

+++

2010: Another Review... pooh!

2011-02-02T07:38:00.000-08:00

What a year it was...
As we mentioned it elsewhere, here, on the TLB Prime Network, 2010 was a "Sheesh Odyssey" for most of the globe...
Personally, of course, it was a most grandiose year - an epic time - a spectacular journey that concluded and began anew, opening up to a brand-new wondrous chapter of total fulfillment, joy and bliss...! But that is just ME (and a certain someone close to me!)
For the rest of the humanoids and assorted creepazoids out there, it wasn't so rosey - one iota!
Still...
I can imagine that Larry King, though cast aside now and completely inactive (for how long, one wonders) can continue to enjoy himself, bask in his own witticisms (or attempts to produce some) and resume his serial monogamy habit...

I can imagine that the New Orleans Saints can resume being make-believe holy persons from the gridiron - ones that fumble the ball and turn the other cheek, always...

And, one last example, I can see voodoo houngans carry on as they did before all the castigation they brought upon their land...!

For the rest...

Well, just read again what we penned for that other blog out there...

From financial chaos to political turmoil; from force majeure devastation to minor squabbles among petty souls on a wordly stage - 2010 saw it all. Of course, it was fully expected. But it did not have to be THAT bad...!

The most frightening thing of all about it is that IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE - MUCH WORSE...

There are psychopaths in the ____ Armed Forces - whatever forces those may be; just fill in the blank with the country of your choice! Rejoice...
Especially when there are arguments defending these psychopaths, out there; sure, it makes sense! We would much rather prefer dispatching psychos over wherever, pitting them up against the other psychos that threaten our national security and all. What we DO NOT WANT is to send over softies and assorted sissies to face off with Public Enemies numbers 1 through 99...! Wake up, Obama! America is already losing on so many fronts; with homo soldiers, it can only speed up that process henceforth...

Speaking of losing streaks now...

Thirty firms went bust every week last year, a business study has revealed. More than 1,500 companies were declared insolvent during 2010, according to statistics complied by insolvencyjournal.ie.

In that forlorn deserted place called QUAWBECK... CULBEC... whatever... The dreaded gaz de schiste made a dramatic appearance on the energetic resources firmament - enough to ignite all the would-be Mad Max clods up there... And everyone else who affectionates old-style energy sources, owning stock in it, for example...

Watch:

(But not too much, eh)

Everything kept going the very same hum-drum way it has always been going over there in the Middle-East, in Irak, in Afghanistan, in all these God-forsaken places where there is a muslim majority persecuting a Christian minority...

It is going to change - BE CERTAIN OF IT.
The Holy Virgin did not appear in Egypt in such a spectacular luminous way, years ago, by sheer coincidence, you know...

Miners in Chili and millions in Haiti REALLY GOT IT BAD in 2010 - especially the latter bunch of characters... You know something in the cosmos has a tooth against you when you are hit by an earthquake, an epidemic and a hurricane ALL IN A ROW.

Hmm... Then again, I survived a fire, a flood and a car crash ALL IN A ROW TOO!
But that is another story...

Asking prices for Irish homes fell by 4.8 percent in the final quarter of 2010, the largest quarter-on-quarter drop recorded last year, according to top expert in the field, property website Daft.ie.
The latest drop meant prices in December were down 14 percent from a year earlier and on average 40 percent below their 2007 peak in the wake of the bursting of Ireland's property bubble.
As for guardian.co.uk, it declared that nationwide reports surprise rise in December after two months of falling prices... The UK housing market has ended a volatile 2010 roughly where it began, after it reported a surprise 0.4% rise in house prices in December. But prices are expected to fall in the early part of the new year. The seasonally adjusted increase in the average UK house price reversed the declines seen in October ... And that is all it did.

Of all the fluff this past year, the world of politics and that of entertainment took away the spotlight from the real tragedies and the real suffering going on in the world with frightening regularity. Nothing has changed in over fifty years, basically.

Elsewhere, of course, the focus shifts upon the local flavour; it is either Cheryl Cole if you are in the U.K. or Lady Gaga in the USA or Bollywood stars if you are trapped in the punjab or something...!

In the wild, widely untamed, unruly and irrational world of sports, upsets were the norm and the unworthiest teams prevailed oftentimes - much to the thinking sportsfan*s chagrin... From the disastrous World Cup results to, once again, dismal new championship results emerging from the grueling ordeals that are the NFL playoffs, MLB post-season, MLS playoffs and that always detestable Stanley Cup that is really nothing more than a glorified ashtray indeed...

Far more interesting is the 2010 final report on health issues, what we call *food* and the secrets around all that jazz... As seen on the *natural news* website...
Throughout 2010, we learned about all sorts of interesting chemicals being used in the conventional food supply. We learned that window cleaning chemicals are injected into fast food hamburger meat (http://www.naturalnews.com/027872_a...), and we learned that soy protein is extracted using a highly explosive chemical called hexane (http://www.naturalnews.com/026315_M...).

Water fluoridation surfaced as a big issue of 2010, and NaturalNews published an article describing the criminality of fluoridation (http://www.naturalnews.com/028913_f...).

The American Chemistry Council, predictably, insisted that BPA was safe for everyone (http://www.naturalnews.com/027975_A...), even as new evidence emerged that BPA was actually quite dangerous and might promote cancer. Food packaging companies scrambled to release BPA-free products, but the chemical is still found throughout canned soups and many other products.

In travel news, a Carnival Cruise Lines ship was stranded in November due to an engine fire. Left with no food, bathrooms, water or electricity, the cruise passengers were rescued by the U.S. Navy who brought -- get this -- Spam and Pop-Tarts! (http://www.naturalnews.com/030354_C...)

The truth comes out
The AIDS / HIV documentary House of Numbers came out in 2010, rocking the AIDS industry with intelligent questions that blew holes in conventional AIDS mythology (http://www.naturalnews.com/027890_A...).

Vitamin D was huge news in 2010 as a steady stream of new evidence emerged, showing how vitamin D can prevent breast cancer (http://www.naturalnews.com/028119_v...) and other degenerative diseases. In 2010, the world came to realize that vitamin D deficiency is now at pandemic proportions (http://www.naturalnews.com/028357_v...).

We also learned more about the dangers of High Fructose Corn Syrup and how it promotes diabetes (http://www.naturalnews.com/028340_d...). The news about HFCS got so bad that the corn syrup industry announced it was changing the name of the ingredient to "corn sugar" in an effort to fool consumers.

There was some good news on the health freedom front in 2010, as the FDA was defeated in the courts over its attempted censorship of a nutritional supplement (http://www.naturalnews.com/028929_F...).

On the intellectual property side of things, the US Patent Office actually took steps to invalidate corporate patents on human genes (http://www.naturalnews.com/030256_g...). This isn't a done deal yet, but it's a hopeful step in the right direction toward ending ridiculous gene patents.

In the "weird news" category, we learned about the giant spinning hexagon on the planet Saturn, as photographed by NASA spacecraft (http://www.naturalnews.com/028797_S...).

The supply of Rare Earth Elements began to be in trouble in 2010 as we learned that many of the key components in electronics and solar panels are actually derived from filthy mines in China where many of these metals are about to be in critically short supply (http://www.naturalnews.com/028028_r...).

On the superfood news side, 2010 saw the introduction of the Boku Super Food Bar (http://www.naturalnews.com/030340_B...), which is the first superfood bar created by the People (using survey results from NaturalNews readers).

Keeping tabs on the cattle
The TSA took center stage in 2010 for reaching down our pants and making us walk through radiation-emitting microwave body scanners. Esteemed scientists warned that the devices could promote cancer and sperm mutations (http://www.naturalnews.com/030607_n...). In response to the TSA's outrageous behavior against a now-famous guy who refused to be molested, I released a song called Don't Touch My Junk which went super-viral across the 'net (http://www.naturalnews.com/030450_D...).

The psychology of TSA agents was compared to Nazi war criminals (http://www.naturalnews.com/030563_T...).

Sheriffs, meanwhile, announced they wanted a national database of prescription drug users (http://www.naturalnews.com/029736_s...) so they could track people who buy (and presumably sell) too many medications.

Big Sis Janet Napolitano announced that Wal-Mart customers should all spy on each other and report anything "suspicious." (http://www.naturalnews.com/030648_W...) We launched a suspicious looking Wal-Mart video in response, featuring all the bizarre photos of the "People of Wal-Mart." (http://www.naturalnews.tv/v.asp?v=5...)

Vaccines
Autism rates continued to climb in 2010, even as mainstream medical authorities insist it isn't caused by anything. Especially not vaccines. (http://www.naturalnews.com/028310_a...)

Speaking of vaccines, in 2010 we learned that vaccines are causing convulsions and seizures in children (http://www.naturalnews.com/028773_v...). One of the first batches made available in the year caused seizures in children (http://www.naturalnews.com/029334_f...). At one point in the year, the FDA admitted that vaccines had been contaminated with a pig virus, but announced they were still safe (http://www.naturalnews.com/028832_r...). Walgreens announced its flu shot gift card (http://www.naturalnews.com/029511_W...) and began running nationwide propaganda campaigns to promote flu shots which, by the way, automatically contained the swine flu vaccine from last year, too.

Not too long after Walgreens issues its flu shot gift card, Australia banned flu vaccines in children (for that batch, anyway) after they were found to cause vomiting, fevers and seizures, sending numerous children to the hospital (http://www.naturalnews.com/029586_A...). Finland soon banned H1N1 vaccines after finding they caused narcolepsy (http://www.naturalnews.com/029596_v...). Right after this, I released my Vaccine Zombie song (http://www.naturalnews.com/029607_V...) which actually didn't do too well, as it was released during the vaccination off season when people weren't paying that much attention to vaccines yet in North America.

In September, we published a story demolishing the quack science behind flu vaccines (http://www.naturalnews.com/029641_v...). The vaccine industry was having a lousy Fall season in 2010, so they tried everything ramp up vaccinations, including opening booths in airports, grocery stores and even offering free vaccine shots at strip clubs! (http://www.naturalnews.com/029962_f...)

The Lancet retracted Dr Wakefield's famous paper linking vaccines to autism, thereby rewriting medical history in much the same way as the lead character in George Orwell's 1984 book, where history was always reconstructed to match the political illusions of the current power holders. (http://www.naturalnews.com/028101_T...)

To expose the fraud of the H1N1 swine flu vaccine scheme, I offered a $10,000 reward for proof that the vaccine was safe and effective (http://www.naturalnews.com/027985_H...), but no one took me up on the offer, of course, since such evidence does not exist. (That's because they never adequately test these vaccines before they start injecting people.)

Ultimately, it turned out that vitamin D worked far better at preventing flu infections than vaccines anyway (http://www.naturalnews.com/029760_v...).

There was a lot of money floating around in the vaccine industry, of course, especially as we learned that World Health Organization advisors were on the take, receiving kickbacks from vaccine manufacturers (http://www.naturalnews.com/028936_W...). In July, Dr Gary Null published a powerful story exposing the quackery and lies of the vaccine industry (http://www.naturalnews.com/029124_f...).

Chemotherapy
One of the more fascinating bits of news from 2010 was the revelation that pharmacists are getting cancer from handling chemotherapy drugs! (http://www.naturalnews.com/029191_s...) Yet they still sell them to others. Interesting, huh?

As part of the chemotherapy push, the LA Times published a story that actually recommended what can only be the most moronic health advice of the year: "Preventive chemotherapy" for those who don't yet have cancer. (http://www.naturalnews.com/030181_L...)

Chemotherapy was the drug of choice for Michael Douglas, of course (http://www.naturalnews.com/029685_M...). He decided to use it to "treat" his cancer, following in the footsteps of Farrah Fawcett who died from chemotherapy last year. Celebrities just can't seem to get enough of chemo, and sadly we have to keep reporting on their deaths each year. Former lead singer of the band LFO, Rich Cronin, also passed away from chemo this year (http://www.naturalnews.com/029699_c...).

Disinfo
The Institute of Medicine released new recommendation on vitamin D. It turns out they were designed to keep everybody vitamin D deficient while warning people not to take too much (http://www.naturalnews.com/030598_v...).

Continuing with nutritional disinfo, a nutrition professor claims he lost weight eating Twinkies (http://www.naturalnews.com/030616_j...) but the media stories neglected to mention you can lose weight on chemotherapy, too.

Sesame Street played a big role in the disinfo efforts of the year, introducing new "superfood" muppets. One of them is a block of cheese, and another is a hamburger bun. (http://www.naturalnews.com/030626_m...)

On the psychiatric stage, 2010 saw the industry label healthy eating a "mental disorder" that they dubbed orthorexia nervosa (http://www.naturalnews.com/029098_o...). That's on top of the similarly concocted Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD) which is diagnosed in anyone who questions authority or refuses to get vaccinated.

As part of the Big Pharma push, doctors began urging fast food restaurants to hand out statin drugs like ketchup packets (http://www.naturalnews.com/029467_s...). We posted a video documenting this news, and it received over a quarter million views: http://www.naturalnews.tv/v.asp?v=D...

We also exposed the top health care lies still driving conventional medicine (http://www.naturalnews.com/028623_h...), and we revealed the ridiculous pinkwashing fraud with Komen's promotion of Kentucky Fried Chicken (http://www.naturalnews.com/028631_K...).

The Food Safety debate was a big deal during the end of 2010 (http://www.naturalnews.com/030461_S...). The bill ultimately passed. It contains language that asks to FDA to "harmonize" the U.S. food supply with Codex Alimentarius (http://www.naturalnews.com/030863_f...). Is also has the FDA setting up food safety enforcement offices in foreign nations.

Big Pharma fraud
Dr. Scott Reuben, an esteemed Big Pharma researcher, was caught faking dozens of studies upon which the medical industry relied to push popular prescription drugs (http://www.naturalnews.com/028194_S...). To this day, Dr Reuben's research is still quoted in books and medical journals, even though we now know he simply invented all the clinical trial data.

But Dr Reuben wasn't the end of the pharmaceutical fraud news in 2010. We also learned that virtually all placebo-controlled trials throughout the industry were fraudulent to begin with because there are zero standards for the composition of the placebo pills, and what they're made of is almost never reported in clinical trials (http://www.naturalnews.com/030209_p...).

We also got news that a doctor recognized by the AMA, published in medical journals and tapped to teach Continuing Medical Education credits was a total fraud, having fooled the medical system for 20 years (http://www.naturalnews.com/030729_W...).

Johnson & Johnson took center stage throughout 2010 with a seeming never-ending stream of product recalls due to all sorts of chemicals and even metal fragments being found in their medicines. They were also caught in a drug profit kickback scheme and were sued by the Justice Department (http://www.naturalnews.com/027994_J...).

Famous people
In 2010, we interviewed Jesse Ventura (http://www.naturalnews.com/028546_J...), Daniel Vitalis (http://www.naturalnews.com/028568_D...), Suzy Cohen (http://www.naturalnews.com/028614_S...), David Wolfe (http://www.naturalnews.com/028839_c...) and many other well-known people.

Former President Bill Clinton announced he was following the "Heart Attack Proof" diet based on juicing and plant-based foods (http://www.naturalnews.com/029816_B...).

Saving the planet from modern "science"
Of course, the Gulf of Mexico oil spill was a significant story in 2010 (http://www.naturalnews.com/028693_G...), and in terms of the pollution of waterways, Big Pharma also emerged in 2010 as a major global polluter (http://www.naturalnews.com/029314_w...).

The GMO stories of 2010 were simply amazing. We learned that the USA was pressuring European countries to stop any GMO labeling of foods (http://www.naturalnews.com/028716_G...), and then later we learned through Wikileaks cables that the United States actually conspired with GMO corporations to push GMOs across Europe while creating a "retaliatory target list" of any who opposed it (http://www.naturalnews.com/030828_G...).

We also learned that the FDA looked eager to approve GMO salmon (http://www.naturalnews.com/029770_s...), but thankfully this decision was slowed by tremendous public outcry.

I launched my "Just Say No to GMO" song in October as part of the GMO Awareness Month activities (http://www.naturalnews.com/030044_N...). The song went super-viral and eventually racked up more than half a million views spanning four languages. Jeffrey Smith from the IRT continues to kick butt exposing the truth about GMOs. In a successful fundraising effort, NaturalNews and its readers raised over $30,000 to help fund the IRT (http://www.naturalnews.com/030407_G...).

The world food supply took major hits during 2010 as freakish weather events caused droughts, floods and freezes that drastically reduced food supply in key areas (http://www.naturalnews.com/027924_f...).

Censorship and Big Government
2010 was a big year of censorship. YouTube censored our interview with Jeffrey Smith about GMOs (http://www.naturalnews.com/028718_Y...) and then later turned the video back on. Alex Jones saw his site removed from the Google News search engine, and YouTube also announced it would drop his entire video channel.

The FTC took part in the censorship, too, going after the POM Wonderful company for telling the truth about the health benefits of its pomegranate juice products (http://www.naturalnews.com/029901_p...).

The Department of Homeland Security began seizing websites in 2010 (http://www.naturalnews.com/030542_c...), claiming (illegal) authority over them. Thanks to Wikileaks, the push is now on for government to try to control the internet.
The raw milk wars were a big news item in 2010, as the FDA and state authorities took aggressive action to criminalize and arrest raw milk producers (http://www.naturalnews.com/028757_r...). Criminal elements of the law enforcement community conducted an armed raid on a raw food co-op in California (http://www.naturalnews.com/030136_R...) called Rawesome Foods. Their crime? They were selling raw milk.

Partly to protect our own video freedom from censorship, we launched NaturalNews.TV which has now grown to the largest natural health video site in the world, with over 10,000 members now uploading videos (and growing daily). Soon popular video stars such as AZ Mike (http://naturalnews.tv/Browse.asp?me...) and Magnus Mulliner (http://naturalnews.tv/Browse.asp?me...) emerged on the site.

Evil experiments
We saw Bill Gates emerge as a global population control zealot, even funding new technology to destroy sperm (http://www.naturalnews.com/028853_u...) and another project to vaccinate people without their knowledge, using covert technology (http://www.naturalnews.com/028887_v...). Later in the year, Gates was actually caught on video calling for a reduction in world population through the use of vaccines (http://www.naturalnews.com/029911_v...).

Meanwhile, the United States was caught red-handed in conducting medical experiments on Guatemalan prisoners (http://www.naturalnews.com/029924_m...). Obama actually had to pick up the phone and apologize for this embarrassing bit of history that shows how governments always use innocents as guinea pigs to test their drugs.

What a year, huh?
In addition to everything mentioned above, 2010 also saw the release of a huge number of studies supporting the healing use of herbs and natural remedies.

Still, 2010 was mostly a year of expanded censorship, attacks on health freedom and expansions of government tyranny.

Learn more: http://www.naturalnews.com/030887_2010_health_freedom.html#ixzz1A7Geneig

*************************************************

On another level of things, 2010 saw the end of many careers as well: most notably of all, Larry King's. Good. He will never again get the facts wrong - on air, anyways.

2010 also saw the demises of another 1001 so-called *stars* too; from Lucienne Day to Boney M himself, Bobby Farrell - they all bit the stardust alright! The final goodbye, not merely an on-air au revoir either. Again, that is nothing new; there will be more... plenty more...

Aye, seeing it through this perspective, 2010 was nothing more than another glum year in a long series of such years which we know as HUMAN HISTORY...

Then again, maybe it is better to see it ALL through the warped eyes of the silly Culbec trou-de-culs...

Then again, maybe not.

NOTA BENE
Do not get me wrong now: 2010 was, without a shadow of a doubt, THE single most wonderful year OF MY ENTIRE LIFE --- but that is not for this blog; rather for another blog, far more endowed with luminescence, basking in it, thriving in it! Here, we lambaste pests: it is what we do best! And so we decided to do it in a different way - a lighter tone, for the holiday season! If you are one of the pests getting blasted this way, you can feel VERY, VERY LUCKY...

+++

Olympic Games... Wimpy Mames!

2010-02-10T04:25:00.000-08:00

So now is the time for *Earth's Brotherhood* to unite again - in complete fraternity and falsehood too, I say! The Olympics have always been about participation, peaceful coexistence and a whole lot of hogwash!

I mean, it makes my skin crawl when egocentric athletes suddenly begin to spout out such gems as *we are athletes, we are nothing in the Grand Scheme of Things - but our troops, now, THERE are Great Men and Women!*

HA.

You never gave a damn before, nestled in your very little bubble, trying to gather up sponsors (and, most importantly, their cash) in order to fund your pipe dream of gold and glory...!

So, now, when you do have your fifteen seconds of fame on top of the soapbox/podium -assuming you *do* garner any medal at all... punks! - forget about mouthing off in a dignified matter, vainly trying to gather the public's sympathy, this time...! Because the truth of the matter is you are every bit as egocentric as the most ambitious of them all in whatever field there is: and such souls do not care about fraternity simply due to the fact that they do not care who they step on, on their way to achieving their goals! They do not give a flying fig about participation and peaceful coexistence, because they are in it to WIN.

P.R. scribes are making their dough now, though; that joint letter that was sent to Canadian troops and co-signed by all three of the hockey teams; captains (but most probably not read in its entirety by anyone on the damn teams!) NOW THAT LETTER is hardcore evidence of that, alright...!!!

They may not get any medals, nor make any true friends; but they sure as hell will be scoring points with the media and setting up the groundwork for their future careers, even post-athletic ones...

But I have rambled enough about this as it is...!

THX...

2009-12-25T18:04:00.000-08:00

Send this eCard !

Well...

THANKS FOR ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

"SANTA"
- HA!

Hmpphhhhh...!

2009-11-28T13:16:00.000-08:00

Idiots will do unto others as has been done to themselves previously - but the truly luminous souls will realize this and halt the sordid process before it gets all out of hand...!
Even better yet: truly luminous souls will not repeat what dim-witted ruffians might have to do or say!
The truly luminous souls will be head and shoulders above all those patterns that we are touching upon here - and they endeavor to do unto others as SHOULD have been done to them, instead!

All that having been said, though...

I could still propose a patented ''nutsoluminous'' alternative here and it is as follows:

to dare to be the instrument of God and to redistribute the hurt, the very same kind of hurt which you suffered, x-number of time ago, and inflict it upon those who truly DO deserve it!

Beats paying it forward to me!
;)

To be continued...
on the lambasting blog!

From Dawn 'Til Yawn!

2009-11-15T23:32:00.000-08:00

SCANDAL!

Dawn saves wildlife...

dot c...a...

BUT

they do so while

blatantly

shamelessly

discriminatively

dismissing

one very endangered

and just as cute as a seal

precious animal:

the tiger!

More specifically

the Giant Tiger!

Notice, when you go there

to enter a code

found on any old bottle

of Dawn

antibacterial

hand soap

(the green one - duh)

that, on the drop down menu

of retailers

after all the

wal-marts, zellerses

and other mercantile creeps,

you will find

the insulting delineation

"Giant Tiger Other"

- and that is the only time

the demeaning word

"other"

will be attached

to ANY of these

retailers to be found

upon the list there...!

How rude of Dawn!

Always thought she was just

a highbrow bi!tch too...

Ok, ok...
I admit it is all a joke
and a scheme to get to call
that overrated comic-bookie nerdie
that time forgot
what she truly is...!
But I am digressing here...
The truth remains that
Giant Tiger is the only one
affixed an "other"
while Giant Eagle,
for example,
does NOT have that problem at all
on the American version
and neither does "Winn-Dixie"
for another example
on the Spanish version
(where you can
activar la donaciôn
in order to "salvar"
la vida silvestre...!
Sheesh!

Why, Dawn, Why?!?

Ha - at that rate,
wildlife will be completely wiped out
before any significant amount of cash
is raised here -
ONE INSIGNIFICANT BUCK at a time
and through such a long process!

*Yawn* - indeed!

Feistian Pact...

2009-09-03T04:52:00.000-07:00

You know, each time I watch this "act" - and this particular video too - I think to myself:

"man - this is what Patti Smith would have done had she been backed-up by the full power of the rock star making machine...!"

Patti Smith or... Laura Nyro.

Leslie Feist, instead, is the lucky recipient of these rewards -
and she looks cool in the process, whereas the other two always looked weird, at best...

I'm not the only one who draws a parallel between these three artists, I hope; after all, according to Yahoo Videos, Feist's list of similar artists includes kinship with such disparate acts as
Iron & Wine
The Arcade Fire
Regina Spektor
The Shins
The Postal Service

Feist, Smith and Nyro at least appear more as if they were cut from the same cloth...!

GRIFFÉS, they call it...

2009-08-09T20:44:00.000-07:00

In France as in Belgium, they probably use the same expression too - but it always strikes me as especially funny coming from Québeckers when they call a fashionista a fashionista and a spade a spade: designating them with the term "griffés!"

When one is "griffé" hence, one is unquestionably stamped with the latest fashion, dressed for success "au goût du jour" - for better and for worse until the trend DIES, that is!

Recently, on that execrable show again (the one called L'INDEX - hosted by the now-former belle of "Belle et Bum" - whatshername again?!?) they had a top ten of the most CLAWED artists this time...

CLAWED, yes, because that is what GRIFFÉS means - literally!

Of course, it is used here in the sense of an imprint placed upon this and that artist's style and clothing (sometimes hairstyle and more too - but let's just stick to clothes here, shall we, lest we start talking in terms of IMAGES LÉCHÈES and other far more sickening things than CLAWING someone -or someone's LOOK- now...! *LMAO*) - and it is a necessary evil in an extremely superficial world in which style prevails over substance 9 times out of 10...

In that top ten, it was clearly evidenced too, as the top ten most GRIFFÉS stars in QUAWBECK were, in whatever order you want: the slutty Caroline Néron, the no-less slutty Vèronic DiCaire, corny Corneille, dopey Wilfred, the less-than Respectables, the less-than-reputable Pierre Lapointe (shy guy, my eye! Try "snobbish bitch" instead, eh? *LMAO*) and all the usual suspects - would-be-divas Annie Villeneuve, ====================== and Céline Dion - duh. In brief; all the made-up, make-believe "stars" that a failed star-system wants to "push" and give a job to! All of them cooked-up and served in total accordance to a proven recipe! Warning: if you do not know any of those names (with the logical exception of Céline!) DO NOT GOOGLE THEM UP!

There - I'm pretty sure every single soul who read me so far has googled them all up now... grrrrrrrreat!

Well, at least, NOW you can tell what exactly I am talking about here: you saw the fake, totally bogus glitzy airs and know it is all quite simply full of HOT AIR and nothing else!

Now for the core of this post: the mockery of the term "griffé" - especially when it is used in the queer Quebecker confines!

Let's face it: the average abysmal quebecker is like something of a neo-caveman; he wants beer, sports on tv, speaks foul things reeking of sacrilege (an unique trait to this race; bravo... not) AND HAS ZERO FASHION SENSE! More important than that, he has not an iota of GOOD TASTE in his (pea)BRAINS!!!

How can such creatures even PRETEND to use that word and to have, among themselves, killer fashion trendsetters... HUH?!?

Nuff said!

F**k H&R Block!

2009-04-01T18:43:00.000-07:00

This is no April Fool's joke - yokes!
Nope!

If it is tax season -and indeedy, it is- then you MUST sing along with me and repeat the following, like a well-intonated mantra:

F**k the Taxman!
F**k the IRS!
F**k the Government - that thieving, lying, MONSTER!

Far from me any intent of bringing forth an age of total and unabashed anarchy to these already barbaric ages we live in - Lord Knows they are tormented enough, these ages, without adding any fuel to the fires that are already burning all about us down here...! No, all I aim to accomplish here is simply stick it to the jerks who have it coming - and then we can all carry on with the systematic charade we are ALL such a vital part of... okay? Good!

Paying taxes is NOT BIBLICAL, folks!
I doubt it is even asked of any other faithful, be it in the Koran, Talmud or,er, whatever!
We are to obey THE LAW - as far as it is based upon GOD'S LAW.
God never really asked for TAXES - now, Did He?
Our Good Lord only ever asked for ONE SIMPLE THING - for us to love Him BACK!
Love, obey and be respectful by showing obedience (to the simplest of things, on top of that...!)
Now, was that so darn difficult to comply with, Adam'n'Eve... EH?
Apparently so - but that is another story (and only a handful of you guys, that happened to read these lines, somewhen, somehow, actually BELIEVE in the story - so let us leave it at that - for now.)

Sure, paying taxes is doing our part and that it is all for the greater good of the masses is unquestionable - but then, look at all the misusing of those tax funds that were collected, and what MONUMENTAL MESS THAT WE ARE ALL IN, NOW, DUE TO THE POOREST MISMANAGEMENT EVER SEEN IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND...?!? For our leaders and our governing bodies are but tools of a flawed system (or series of systems) that maintain but a mere semblance of order amidst the reigning chaos - never lose sight of THAT!

Tax-collectors have it real bad now too, more than their most famous colleague (Matthew - the evangelist, yes) ever did - with the track record of all previous administrations everywhere (and since the recession is GLOBAL - that applies to whatever country you want now; yours too, dear reader!)

For, no matter how they will collect - NOTHING can ever fix the economical mess and the marasm we are all in now...!

Pay the piper anyways... eh?

;)

Feminism = reverse misogyny!

2009-03-07T18:06:00.000-08:00

It sure damn is!

I was zapping on through the other idle, boring week-end afternoon and BAM; I stumble across the latest pledge drive for wretched PBS! Ughhhh!
Who is helping them out, this time? Hmm? HMM?
Somebody with a common interest, as usual - someone who wants to "donate" his/her time just so he/she garners enough FREE PUBLICITY in order to, down the line, cash in BIG TIME...
And, in the meantime, that someone "donates" CDs or DVDs of his latest "great works" - to whomever donates 100, 250 or 500$ ON THE SPOT!
Great, GREAT racket, I tell ya...

But who was it, this time?
André Rieu? Some forgotten folk singer on some kind of "revenge tour/comeback" for the umpteenth time? Yanni, again?
None of the above!
It was SUZE!
Suz-eeeeeeeee - please! (Pronounce it as she wants it to be pronounced, already!)

At some point, the high finance dyke says something that struck hard: and it wasn't even anything from her vast, deep reaches of wealth wisdom either! It was just a SIDE JOKE in fact - REALLY...! She said "men die before we do; I'd swear that we're killing them off!"
(I may be paraphrasing, but that is the gist of it alright...!)
SHEESH...
Here she is talking to an exclusively female audience, talking about empowering them to help THEMSELVES (heck her exact words there are "teaching you to SAVE YOURSELVES" - no less! But I am digressing now; and straying from my main point of contention!)

You self-empowered gals are killing us off, eh?
HA!

If that isn't reverse-misogyny, what is?

As I zap further away, in semi-disgust, I find, back-to-back, the commercials for two local films no one in their right minds will go see in a theater - even if you are a local denizen, born and bred...

"POLYTECHNIQUE" and "JE ME SOUVIENS" are certainly two films of the Québécois fabric that NEEDED to be made; before the world goes down the tubes, that is!

But that is all I'll say of "positive" about it -
they remain Canadian films, after all; hence, they SUCK!

Thinking about that guy in the real-life inspired POLYTECHNIQUE film though; he sure made sure no Suze would kill him off and thrive on financially while he would rot away - he killed a dozen women with promising careers ahead of them before offing himself.
His mother is now making a LIVING, very nearly, with the strife and anguish she incurred from all this trauma and the stygma of having her son commit such a heinous act - proving that trauma pays and that, in the end, no matter what the circumstances, even when they get to be atrocious and horrendous and as far removed from the normalcy of a humdrum life as it can be; Suze is RIGHT!
If bimbos your age don't get you, a dyke will or your own mothers will make a bundle off of you...! Tragedy after tragedy; a domino effect of the most insidious kind, here... But most observers would call it "turning a negative into a positive" - and that can be true, too. Truth on this level and on this side of reality is always subject to PERCEPTION, alas...

I am not sure what JE ME SOUVIENS is truly all about; but it obviously caters to the inane sense of grandeur that the Québécois Queer has, generally-speaking of course... It stars Céline Bonnier and Roy Dupuis - and everybody knows that Céline will also outlive Roy here; it is a given! No matter where you turn, Suze's words resonate now; so it seems anyway, on this idle week-end afternoon...!

I wonder how many Quebec bimbos she will "convert" to her program though: the PBS affiliate I watched can obviously be seen in that territory, but the hoes (I add an "e" to ho, always; my prerogative, ok?) up there have to KNOW THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE in order to "catch on" and sign up!
Similarly, redneck and yankee hoes (...) have to have enough brain cells left after years of self-abuse in order to possibly be able to muster any kind of willpower and start self-empowering away...!

Sounds like something straight out of the damn POWER RANGERS, dammit...!!!

I'm sure anyone with half-a-brain can imagine Suze hitting on the female Rangers now... *LMBO*

Not that I am implying she hits on half her audience now; she knows better than to do that! She's allegedly content with her "life-partner" anyway... HA!

And she has tons of good old common sense NEVER to jeopardize the money-making machine she tinkered out of thin air...!

She can talk all she wants about women outliving men, ultimately though; because she'e neither a woman, nor a man. Nor even a dyke!
She's an ORMAN!

LOL

p.s.

Did I just blog this a mere few hours before the International WOMEN'S DAY OR SOMETHING...?

I sure did!

;)

March Madness... Bah!

2009-03-03T04:11:00.000-08:00

Some kind of inspiring tune here -
even though it would have been better for another topic...
I.M.N-S-H.O.

And the perfect song for the losers too
(which represent the majority of the participants in the tournament, after all! They all have sneering, unsupportive girlfriends, I'm sure...
Pimply though they be...!)

And then, in the demoralized state that thee art, on the ride home, listen to this one:

2008: Year In Review

2008-12-31T15:49:00.000-08:00

HA.

'Twas nothing but more of the same old same old CRAP - that's all the reviewing that is truly REQUIRED here!

However, if you need more:
check out the Yahoo review - why don't you!
Check out the Year Review published IN ADVANCE by those money moguls over at SmartMoney.com - why don't you!? Just for the fun of checking out how wise these wiseguys really are...!
Check this out too - just for laughs, maybe?
Gotta go with the Google Year In Review blog too...!
And let's SLAM it all too - why don't we...

Nothing like MY own brand of slamming, slapping and stomping though!

Here goes, just in brief:

BARACK OBAMA IS A LIAR TOO.
Joe Biden will be just about as bad as Dick Cheney.
Stephen Harper is a clone.
The Gaza Strip is not out of the woods yet...
Wait 'til all the Arab countries gang up on Israël - then the USA steps in and whoopla! Can you spell World War Three yet?
India and Pakistan will exchange pleasantries too...
Everyone who died this year is better off than sticking around for this...
(Miss ya, Eartha!)
And the Antichrist is... ah, that would be telling!
;)

I CAN'T STAND THIS SONG ANYMORE!!! (Spécial EN FRANÇAIS - again!)

2008-12-26T18:38:00.000-08:00

Et NON - je ne parle pas de la chanson du temps des Fêtes de Lennon - pas cette fois...!

Je parle plutôt de ceci:

"NOËL... NOËL...
TOUT L'MONDE VEUT DES CADEAUX!"

"C'est qui qui chante ça, donc?!?" demandez-vous?
"Quelle toune quétaine!!!" direz-vous... et vous auriez BIEN raison!

(Je garderais l'identité de l'artiste qui endisqua l'atrocité en question UN MYSTÈRE! Ça vaudra mieux comme ça...!)

Voilà de bien meilleures paroles, pour celle-là...!
Essayons-donc quelque chose comme ÇA:

NOËL... COMMERCIAL...
TOUT LE MONDE ACHÈTE DES BÉBELLES!
ET DANS L'OPULENCE GROTESQUE
ON VIT DANS UNE INDÉCENTE FRESQUE
BORDEL... BORDEL...
AH QUE C'EST DONC ÉCOEURANT!

TEMPS DES FÊTES BIEN BÊ-BÊTE
LES GENS NE SAVENT PLUS QUOI FAIRE POUR PLAIRE
ILS BOIVENT COMME DES TROUS - SANS TÊTE
ILS SONT VRAIMENT PAS DES CADEAUX!

NOËL... COMMERCIAL...
LA RÉPUGNANCE S'INSTALLE
CAR FACE À TOUS CES EXCÈS
LE FASTE NE PEUT QU'ÊTRE LAID
BORDEL... QUEL BORDEL...
OUI, VRAIMENT FORT RÉPUGNANT!

OUI!

Ever seen "L'INDEX QUÉBÉCOIS" on "Musimax" - ? (SPÉCIAL EN FRANÇAIS - OUAIS!)

2008-12-04T20:50:00.000-08:00

Le taux d'indexation n'aura jamais été aussi penaud..!
disaient les nouvelles, ironiquement...!

J'ai eu le MALHEUR, cette dernière semaine, de tomber sur l'épisode intitulé Les 10 Artistes Québécois Ayant Connu Un Seul Succès - et cela me laissa fermement convaincu qu'en effet j'en connais plus sur la musique québécoise que je ne le voudrais vraiment...! Non, je n'ai rien à envier aux "experts critiques, journalistes et artisans du showbiz" qui se prononcent constamment, avec verve (parfois) même, à chaque fois que la Claudine (Prévost - la belle du bum de Télé-Québec et non pas la Clodine fille de parents dyslexiques du Québec pure laine Desrochers, de TVA...!) se pointe la fraise pour donner une voix aux invisibles "bibliothécaires musicaux de première classe" employés par Musimax pour mettre en images finement montées chaque épisode de ces émissions de merde...! (On reprend son souffle, là - et on repart!) Mais enfin - ne nous égarons pas du sujet; pas tout de suite, en tous cas!
;)

J'ai eu, donc, le malheur de tomber sur ça en "flippant" d'une chaîne à l'autre, errant comme un égaré des temps médiatiques nouveaux, comme à l'accoutumée... (Hé - ça fait au moins dix ans que le Boss a entonné "57 channels and nothing on" - n'est-ce pas?)
Et ce que j'ai vu et entendu m'a certes fait rager assez pour que je blogue sur le sujet - en français (par surcroît!)
C'est tout dire!

Je ne referais pas (j'espère) toute la liste exposée ce soir-là, mais certains choix m'ont sauté aux yeux tout de même:

JANO BERGERON et son "Recherché - dans les rues de la ville...!"
MARTINE CHEVRIER et son "DANSER pour danser... pour oublier!"
NELSON MINVILLE et son satanisme (on y reviendra plus tard, à ce salaud!)
FRANCIS MARTIN et la fois qu'il s'est donner "à une femme d'expérience..." et y perdit son innocence dans la balance...! (J'm'en balances-tu ben, moiais?!? *lol*)
L'insupportable STEF CARSE et sa version du "Achy Breaky Dance" (argh - juste taper cela fût tellement SOUFFRANT...!)
L'également fort inaudible "VIVRE DANS LA NUIT" de l'éxécrable groupe "NUANCE" affublé de la pire chanteuse possible (au look "pimbèche destroy" - pour être poli...! Sandra Dorion - c'est ça?) qui décroche, en fait, la position peu enviable de numéro un de cet embarrassant "top ten"...!
JOANE LABELLE et sa reprise d'une vieille chanson québécoise qui marcha fort dans les années '70 (on y reviendra...!)
Et aussi PAUL SARRASIN et sa reprise d'un autre classique; "Blue Jean Sur La Plage" - ce qui est soi-disant SON SEUL HIT...?
Et sa chanson originale "JALOUSIE" alors - ce ne fût pas un "hit" peut-être? (Okay, on se comprend que quand l'on parle de "hits" au "Cul-bec" c'est pas la même chose qu'un VRAI HIT à l'Américaine - mais tout de même!)
"(DOUCE)JALOUSIE - OUAIS!" était un HIT - okay?
Il y a juste à voir le vidéo pour comprendre cela!
(Si vous réussissez à le voir de nos jours, il y a fort à parier que vous aurez d'ores et déjà vu Luminous Luciano à son meilleur - flanqué du sosie de son amie de coeur d'un coup de vent de l'époque - mais ça c'est une autre histoire...!)
Mais ce n'est pas juste pour ces raisons-là que la "toune" marcha si bien, de fait (suffisamment pour être affublée du titre autant évasif qu'illusoire de "hit"...) - il y a aussi le népotisme prévalent de l'époque, qui aida grandement Paul à lancer sa carrière de chanteur à l'époque qu'il était encore un "veejay" à Musique Plus: ses vidéos entraient dans la GRANDE ROTATION, et jouaient BEAUCOUP...!
Alors ne venez pas me dire qu'il a eu un seul hit dans sa carrière, si courte soit-elle...!

Mais revenons-en à LABELLE JOANE maintenant...!
La même merde et les mêmes balivernes nous sont données à son sujet aussi: alors que TOUS savent bien qu'elle eu une courte série de hits successifs et non pas un seul, on s'entête à nous dire qu'elle n'en a eu qu'un seul...! Son tout premier fût, en fait, sa "réponse à Roch Voisine" et la toune de ce dernier portant (et jettant son dévolu) sur une certaine "Hélène" - qu'à cela ne tienne, même si Joane est loin d'être une Hélène, elle rétorte dès lors avec "tu sais, j'ai dû partir..." (pour ne plus revenir... ne plus souffrir... ne plus mentir, BITCH? Vous êtes bien toutes les mêmes, hein? Phah! *LOL* Je rigole - mais vous ne saurez jamais à quel degré, exactement...!)
;)

Et c'est ÇA qui lança la carrière de Joane Labelle!
Capisce?

Revenons-en à Minville, maintenant:
il clame haut et (trop) fort que "même si elle se prélasse (je crois que c'est cela; à moins que ce ne soit "se lasse d'être...") dans les bras de satan lui-même, IL L'ATTEND PAREIL...! On a l'estomac solide, hein mon full Nelson?
Sa carrière aurait été "short-circuitée" selon les "experts" (encore une fois) dû à sa grande ressemblance (la voix, surtout) avec Luc de Larochellière - qui, pourtant, n'a pas eu une si grande carrière que ça, lui non plus...!
Moi, je blamerais le mauvais goût du chanteur (de se contenter des restes du diable en personne!) et son manque de charisme - de même que le "poor management" bien sûr!

Ah, et le pauvre zèlé MARC DROUIN était sur la liste également: comment expliquez-vous donc ça, vous-là-là, hmm? Il a eu un GROS succès avec TESTAMENT D'UN AMANT aussi - pas juste la chanson sélectionnée (SI... TU VEUX MON AVIS... VIS TA VIE... VIS TA VIE - TA VINAIGRETTE!)

Au moins ils mentionnèrent l'existence de Pied de Poule...! Wow...

J'en oublie un ou deux, je crois - bou-hou.
Ah, non; ça me reviens, là - c'est Belgazou!
Encore une fois, comme avec Labelle Joane, la belle gazou a eu plus qu'un seul petit hit chanceux - sinon comment expliqueriez-vous le fait hors-du-commun que je me souvienne des mots suivants: "JE VEUX PAS QUE TU M'AIMES -
JE VEUX PAS DE PROBLÈMES -
SI T'AS DU COEUR, APPUIE SUR L'ACCÉLÉRATEUR!"
Seulement ce fait ahurissant (et je me souviens de la musique qui va avec, aussi!) prouve sans l'ombre d'un seul doute que l'entité appelée "Belgazou" en a eu plus qu'un seul hit, soit donc celui-là identifié à l'émission dont nous parlons ici; et ce soi-disant seul et unique hit était "TALK ABOUT IT - IL FAUT TOUJOURS S'ÉCOUTER (ET ou MAIS) SANS PARLER - TALK ABOUT IT!"

All right - let's talk!

Et, encore une fois, me semble-t-il, j'ai plus de connaissances sur le sujet que je ne voudrais normalement l'admettre, de un, mais aussi que ces soi-disants "experts critiques" présents: le gars qui compare Belgazou à Mitsou avec verve - pis la fille du Journal de Montréal (je crois!) qui doit en avoir trop en tête pour tout se rappeler... hein?

Mais, c'est un fait, la Belle Gazou (tout comme Mitsou) n'a pas l'ombre du talent du grand laid, Garou, par exemple! La laideur l'emporte toujours sur la beauté, avec le temps, bien sûr - comme la vieillesse sur la jeunesse, évidemment! Cela va de paire! Mais passons outre cela maintenant...
Après tout nous "dealons" dans l'éphémère aujourd'hui; "the music industry" c'est, en effet, "en plein dedans" - comme on dit!

Mais tout cela m'amène à la chose suivante...

LA VRAIE LISTE DE "ONE HIT WONDERS" MADE IN CUL-BEC reste à faire vraiment, bien sûr; mais, comme d'habitude, je n'hésite jamais à mettre la main à la pâte et à "deliver the goods" (hé - c'est déjà assez "torturant" pour moi d'écrire ceci non seulement en français, mais en "culbéquois" en plus...! Vous me permettrez une petite incartade anglaise - OKAY? Bon - ça fait deux! Ou vingt! GOOD!)

ALORS VOICI LA VRAIE LISTE -
THE LUMINOUS LIST -
LES VÉRITABLES DIX ONE-HIT WONDERS DU CULBEC!!!
(Nul besoin d'identifier le seul et unique hit - il n'y en a vraiment eu qu'un seul, dans tous ces cas-ci, zinzins...!!)

10. Le 1er rappeur en français - c'était quoi son nom déjà...?!?

9. N'importe quelle "star" issue de la maudite Academy...!

8. São - vous demandez déjà "qui" - n'est-ce pas...? (*)

7. Dion - la soeur de l'autre...

6. Le gars qui chantait "Dans La Jungle Des Villes"...

5. Brathwaite et son tour de chant avec "des larmes de MÉTAL!"

4. La chanteuse de "dansons... le... Pied de Poule!"

3. KATHLEEN, quand ça allait si bien...

2. Je la mettrais ici, la chanteuse de blues peu recherchée, JANO BERGERON...

1. Et je mettrais en première place mon favori personnel - et nostalgique!
PATRICK ZABÉ et...
"A-GA-DOU... DOU... DOU!
pouss' l'ananas et mouds l'café
AGADOU... DOU... DOU!
pouss' l'ananas et mouds l'café
Tap' la pomm' tap' la poir' pouss' l'ananas et mouds l'café
Tap' la pomm' tap' la poir' pouss' l'ananas et mouds l'café!

L'an dernier à Tahiti
Une jolie vahiné
Avec son Ukulélé
M'a vraiment Ukulélé
Ell'vendait de forts beaux fruits
Avec son Ukulélé
Quand on les avait choisis
Y avait plus qu'à les manger
{au Refrain}

Accusé d'avoir goûté
Aux pomm' de ma vahiné
Paraît-il sans permission
On me jeta en prison
Je dus payer au papa
Comme une poir' mon ananas
Et puis le dédommager
D'un Ukulélé très laid
{au Refrain}

Si tu vas à Tahiti
Prends garde au Ukulélé
Dis-toi que ces fruits si beaux
Sont destinés aux gogos !
{au Refrain, 2x}"

Patrick Zabé
Agadou - Paroles: Mya Simille
Musique: Michel Delancray
1974 © Nobel

(J'ai eu "ben du trouble" à trouver ces paroles, aussi -
puisque, dès le premier site accédé pour retrouver les paroles de ce CLASSIQUE, je trouvais plutôt ceci: La publication des Textes sur le site Paroles.net est suspendue par Ordonnance du Tribunal de Grande Instance de Toulon du 10 septembre 2008 à la requête de plusieurs éditeurs et de la CSDEM au vu des articles L122-4 et L335-3 du Code de la Propriété Intellectuelle.
Ordonnance reçue le 20 novembre 2008
Négociations en cours ...)

Hmpffff...

Mais en tous cas - j'ai trouvé pareil!
Et je suis ABSOLUMENT SÛR que Monsieur Zabé appréciera que je propage son oeuvre ici, SANS AUCUN BUT COMMERCIAL QU'IL SOIT, lui gagnant ainsi de nouveaux fans, de nouveaux admirateurs qui découvrent son talent ainsi, enfin...!
Le "chorus" par contre; n'aurait-il pas dû se lire ainsi: "A-ga-dou-dou-dou - pousse l'ananas et mouds le café... Tappe la pomme, tappe la poire..."
C'est juste du Français CORRECT; c'est pas si dur, et ça aide la prononciation, aussi...! À moins qu'on veuille être poire - et qu'on en veuille, une tappe?
Et vlan!

Tiens toé - play it again and tick them all off to death!

Par ailleurs, remarquer, tous, l'absence de ma liste de noms tels que JOE BOCAN... BREEN LEBOEUF... PETER PRINGLE... ROCH VOISINE... BRUNO PELLETIER... CAROLINE NÉRON... MARIE-CHANTALE TOUPIN... MARA TREMBLAY... AMÉLIE VEILLE... ALFA ROCOCO... ANIK JEAN... BIA... BET E ET STEF... IMA... PAMELA... MARYSE LETARTE... SYLVIE BERNARD... EMILY... JACYNTHE... MAHÉE... LUC DE LAROCHELLIÈRE... HUGO LAPOINTE... YVES ET MARTIN... RBO... "JELL-O" PIERRE VERVILLE... "ONCLE GEORGE" DANIEL LEMIRE ... PATOF, GÉRARD D. LAFLAQUE ET MONSIEUR TRANQUILLE! (Hé - ils ont lancé des disques, eux aussi!)
Je sais différencier "carrières en dents de scie" et "artistes d'un soir" - moi!
Et puis il y a une troisième catégorie aussi: les artistes qui auraient dû avoir laisser faire, comme Nelson Minville, Léandre (le masseur, de nos jours...) et autres imitateurs de mauvais goût...

Quoique certains ici sont des "artistes chevronnés" - les Breens, Brunos et autres auraient mieux fait, quant à eux, de rester enfouis dans une COLLECTIVE...

Quant à ces comédiens qui s'improvisent chanteurs - ayoye...

Il en va de même (ayoye) pour nombre de nouveaux talents aussi...

On ignore que l'ère des chansonniers (qui "parlent" plus qu'ils ne chantent vraiment - appelons cela un monologue avec musique de fond, tiens!) est RÉVOLUE, c'est ça? Enfin, oui; tout revient à la mode, éventuellent, et Carla Bruni fait sa part pour ce retour-là... Alors, je me lancerais en musique sous peu, moi aussi! Premier hit: un remake ou cover version de Douce Jalousie! Tant qu'à faire...! *LOL* (*MDR* je veux dire - ou taper, enfin!)

=======================

(*)
NOTA BENE: Eh oui, je sais, c'est ma cousine... c'est un choix népotiste... Mais le népotisme fait partie intégrante de ce métier, alors... Eh oui, je sais qu'il est sans aucun doute discutable si elle en a vraiment eu UN seul vrai de vrai "hit" en effet...
Peut-être la toune qui fût incluse sur une compilation de Belle Et Bum, parrainée par l'animatrice Claudine Prévost, justement...?
Peut-être que le top ten que nous voulons TOUS faire ici c'est vraiment celui des DIX STARS LES PLUS ÉPHÈMÈRES AU CULBEC...?
Après tout, São était avec Renée Martel chez Star Records!
LE "label" des one-hit wonder... wannabees!
J'ADORE Renée Martel, by the way...!
Mais faire son nom avec des "cover versions" de hits américains mal-traduits, puis avec un retour aux sources country de papa... ben... c'est cou-ci, cou-ça comme ils disent là-bas!

Elle est une grande dame pareil!

;)

when you have nothing to say...

2008-11-25T21:12:00.000-08:00

... say nothing at all!!! Is that CLEAR?

Well, maybe it is - NOW.

Alas, most tarts out there do not know when to zip it - case in point:

Natacha Raconte...

They've peabrains and yet, somehow, they've developed a glandular or something that has produced "attitude" and all that comes with THAT... Thus, they're unable to decipher where their true role and place is - in the kitchen, nowhere else! And these expressions that they seek VALIDATION in; "elles n'ont pas la langue dans leur poche"... HA! That one is surely the DUMBEST EXPRESSION OF ALL TIME! Not only is it a physical impossibility, but also this type of chick will never be caught dead in something with enough width to the fabric to have an actual pocket on it! And besides, their tongues will be seen going up and down in any number of places - EXCEPT pockets of any kind!
I kid, for the most part, BUT JUST BARELY...!

Here's another example of that very annoying specimen right here:

Anik Jean

Maybe it is due to having never properly matured then...?
It might be the case for Mariloup W. here:

Être encore ado… à 30 ans !

It might be the case for Mariloup, hence, with a name like that, she can't be blamed... BUT it can't be the case for all of them!

LEAST OF ALL PAULINE MAROIS!!!

Now THAT haughty chick has NO EXCUSE: she's a loudmouth, she's overbearing, she's rude, she cuts off everybody else as if only SHE should be talking and only SHE knows best... HA! If she did, that dumb bitch would not be clamoring for such a pathetic lost-in-advance "uncause" as the independence of Quebec!

And she dares CEASELESSLY interrupt the honorable Jean Charest in a debate in which she had NEXT TO NOTHING TO BRING, IN TRUTH...!

Pathetic.

I've a few women in my very own FAMILY who are EXACTLY like that: they don't know squat, they still won't let you talk and they want to do the talking - ALWAYS. One word describes this type in particular: EXASPERATING.

Another might well be... pathetic, indeed!
;)

I kid you NOT!

All That Hallows Crap!

2008-10-31T19:19:00.000-07:00

Yeah, they want candy - and it made for a very annoying song, back in the eighties.. One you can listen to here.. But I am digressing right off the bat here!

Whoever the moron was that truly believed that dressing up like a scary thing would have the slightest effect on warding off evil spirits and their like was a total and complete nitwit INDEED.

And trick-or-treating is equivalent to begging to be poisoned, I say!

Plus, encouraging all to disguise themselves - allowing them to roam free in said disguises - and then acting all surprised there were crimes committed overnight - well now, that is just REALLY DUMB!

That's all for All-Hallows' Eve (not bad for a night when one could actually ramble on and on EVEN MORE, really...! I am only busy pretending I'M NOT HOME, after all, here - so that the damnable Trick-Or-Treaters DON'T GET A THING OUTTA ME!!!) so now BUZZ OFF AND PARTY ON - with MY music too, see if I CARE...!

Découvrez 92611,People Are Strange,1577,Echo & The Bunnymen,25503,The Lost Boys,dc8cbb098d6a09dbd0206e5ad1bc8915,,0,219,0,0!

***

2008-10-13T10:13:00.000-07:00

Happy Thanksgiving, Canada!

You may want to thank the fates
and the Queen of England
for every single tiny portrait of her
that you still have either in your wallet
or a legal claim to...!
(Ha - so funny...
a legal claim to handle legal tender!
HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Okay - that's enough!)

Verily, on this Thanksgiving,
Canadians must be thankful for MANY things
- for these are quite a lot of things
that have taken for granted
and that might never return!
Such as...
cheap gas (1.09 a gallon or so)
affordable daycare services (see if I care...!)
actual representation in Ottawa
(especially after tomorrow.)
and any kind of "medicare"...!

This but to name only a few things...!
One wouldn't want to head for the polls
outright DEPRESSED now, would we?

Best of luck to the AMERICANS
next month
when it is THEIR turn to give thanks
AFTER the poor voting process
and turnout...!
AND results...
But I am digressing
- once again!

Pro-Pain...? And "From Georgia With Ammo*... Even 007 Never Was This Explosive!

2008-08-11T14:42:00.000-07:00

HEADLINES...
Hundreds still barred from homes bordering blast site amid asbestos threat - 1 hour ago
The Canadian Press - TORONTO - The lingering threat of airborne asbestos and serious damage to half a dozen buildings bordering the site of a massive propane explosion left hundreds of people displace...

Montreal riot raises questions about police tactics as anger simmers - 1 hour ago The Canadian Press - MONTREAL - A tough, multi-ethnic neighbourhood was under tight police surveillance Monday after erupting in violence over a fatal shooting that has stoked simmering anger toward a...

Residents to be covered by insurance following explosion but pricetag unknown - 2 hours ago The Canadian Press - TORONTO - Homeowners, businesses and insurance companies were tallying the damage Monday after a massive propane explosion in Toronto over the weekend that could wind up costing m...

Insurgents attack outpost in Panjwaii killing 90th Canadian soldier - 2 hours ago The Canadian Press - KANDAHAR, Afghanistan - A burly "mountain of a man" nicknamed the Friendly Giant became the second Canadian combat death in three days when insurgents attacked a remote outpost...

Feuding Kitimat families injured in sword fight - 2 hours ago CBC - A fight between two teen girls in Kitimat, B.C., allegedly escalated into a bizarre feud between two families that led to a street brawl and a swordfight that eventually ended in the local hospital...

Forget about all that Bond drivel - such as the upcoming Quantum Of Solace or any other Bond available on DVD and/or Blu-Ray disc! Reality is once again proving to be far more interesting than even the most outrageous fiction! These are good/bad/odd times to be living in - and here are just a few reasons why...!

Propane blasts have more than inconvenienced a whole lot of Toronto residents - and mayor David Miller (with all his obvious P.R. training and calm soap-operaish demeanor) cannot keep people from being concerned...! If propane gas leaks can cause this much massive destruction - couldn't it happen at any time, and anywhere...? What's to say most of T.O. will not be a burning melting pot by the end of the decade? Well, at least no one will have to NUKE it, eh? Nobody would bother with the nuking of T.O. anyway...! But that is another story!

As Toronto panics with its propane blasts that come out of the blue as far as city officials are concerned, me, I cannot help but to think of just a few years back...! SARS and the West Nile Virus were the two HUGE concerns for Canadian metropolises such as T.O. and Vancouver - not anything else, least of all any concerns over propane, a resource they allegedly have "under control"...! It was SARS and the Virus, yes; which had prompted many cartoonists to draw psychotronic cartoons of the absurd situation in which we usally saw SARS represented by a huge gelatinous fiend hovering above the city, fighting it out with a gigantic mosquitoe, clearly a colossal carrier of the West Nile Virus! And, in this epic urban confrontation of titans, right at the heart of the city, unconcerned with any sky scrapers that might get knocked down in the process of their rumble, the two behemoths had a third opponent waiting in the wings: Mad Cow Disease, appropriately embodied by the skeletal and ghastly figue of a dead cow - of course. On a parallel with all that "creativity" I recall having my own creative surges of a questionable nature: it was around those years, I do believe, that I took to lampooning the usual gang of idiots employed by one Vince McMahon and when came time to do a take-off on his precious new big guy, whom he called "Big Daddy Cool, Diesel" I thought it logical to go with the other gas... Propane! Hence "Pro-Payne" a pro at dishing out pain, was born! And the catch with my big guy: he ran out of gas real fast! He was to have a gargantuan appetite and, the longer he went without food, the less "pro" and apt at dishing out any kind of pain was he! He'd just lose interest - and look for a snack instead! I thought my parody was right on too... ;)

But back to T.O. now -

Meanwhile, only a few miles north, the other Canadian city that's become too-much-of-a-melting-pot, Montreal, created its own blasts as, there, those were the handiwork of the riotous local residents - AGAIN. At least it wasn't Habs-handiwork; this time, for once, they almost had a CAUSE there, them riotous rebels...! They lamented the death of an 18 year-old punk, felled by the bullets of the local constabulary force for being all that he could possibly be, and proceeded to do so with violence by once again vandalizing commercial property and private property alike - and even shooting a lady cop for good measure (only in the leg though; they're such poor shots, them "Montréal-Nord punks"...!)

And the Montreal mayor now, gee-whiz, does he sound anemic or what! Unlike his counterpart in T.O., mayor Gerald Tremblay sounds wimpy, geeky, Woody-Allenish almost - there's just no commander-in-chief aura there! But that should not be surprizing in the least either... What is surprising is that THEY all sound surprised and so disappointed that there's been more disgracious rioting on their turf - once more tarnishing the already seriously-tarnished image of that sorry town! Hey, look at the bright side, Gerald: at least THIS TIME there was some semblance of a GOOD REASON to revolt like this, to go through all these excesses that turned several blocks of your precious town (as many as a dozen at the very least) into a literal WAR ZONE - without the war per say! The punk who was shot dead at 18 years of age was, apparently, not a dangerous criminal at all! Okay, he wasn't to become a very useful citizen either; but he could have been allowed to live on a wasteful life, as most of them apparently have the "right" to - while collecting social welfare checks, promiscuously reproducing themselves always out-of-wedlock (forget that aspect of the sad state of affairs: what about the fact that the mommies never really know WHO the daddy is anymore?!? lol) AND not contributing one iota to the "collectivité" as they say over there...!

The cherry on top of all this, though?

These Montreal and Toronto morons and turds are so much like the Americans: they always think the bad stuff will happen "elsewhere, not here" and when they do get to see some footage of what is going on in the world, ACTUAL WAR ZONES WHERE DEATH AND DECAY ARE AN EVERYDAY FACT, they remain unfazed by it... It is so ironic that, at their own hands and due to their own incompetence and/or lack of vigilance, their two precious sprawling urban cities are looking like any other war zone abroad: with flames, millions in damages, chaos, anarchy and despair at every corner!

The real deal is happening in GEORGIA though; not the United State, evidently... Russia has always had the knack (or misfortune) to be typecast as the bad guy of service - and here, once again, it looks like the bully picking on the smaller guy...! Georgia is fighting back though - a David not afraid to repeat history and TRY, at least, to topple another Goliath... Well, not really of course; all it hopes for is to be left alone by "Mother Russia" - and they might get their wish, especially with the United Nations involvement...

Until then, the mismatch war, Georgia versus Russia, will go on for a while longer - at least it's a REAL CONFLICT, with damages that have a logical reason of BEING THERE, unlike the silly events that keep happening in places like T.O. and Montreal... Absolutely avoidable silly events - that, quite absurdly and revoltingly, DO cost lives too, sometimes. (Is there any real need to go over that umpteenth death in Afghanistan -WHAT ARE CANADIAN TROOPS STILL DOING THERE- or that crazy Kitimat BC family feud that puts to shame even the Addams Family?!?)

Mercifully, these crazy things cost lives on a much smaller scale.
Everything is on a smaller scale in Canada - don't you know it yet? Vast land they have - for absolutely nothing! What a waste...

But that is another story!
Nuff said - for now!

+++

Happy Birthday CAW-NAH-DAHHH! Not!

2008-06-30T16:48:00.000-07:00

On July 3rd, it'll be the 400th anniversary of QUEBEC - the city first, then the province, in that order yes... (More on that in a sec - ok?)
But today, it's only the 141st of CANADA OVERALL... what gives?!?

Well, that just gives you a sense of how screwd history can get when it pertains to a HISTORICAL MISTAKE...!!!
I've made it no secret how I feel about this country that is located north of the 49th parallel on the North American continent - or, more commonly referred to as "north of the border" or simply "north of the USofA" - yup! It is a historical mistake, begotten out of the basest human desires (quest for riches, expansion, conquest, demential empirical yearnings - AND the pernicious French jealousy towards all of the English endeavours...!)

As such, the end result could only turn out as it is - a misbegotten country that owes its name to either a simpleton term or an insult, and one that has trouble holding it all together...!

Hence the recent "reasonable accomodations" dossier up there...
And up in the air too!

Hence the constant separation and dissolvement threats...

And all this truly is UNDENIABLE PROOF that we do pay for our fathers' sins - in this case, most ancient forefathers, if "you-are-Canadian" or worse yet - if you're "Québécois"...!

They are complaining over there, this summer - for more reasons than usual...

Movie productions are not coming to their lousy locales anymore - which should automatically increase the quality of the films, I say! But that is another story...

The technical crews are therefore with a much lighter workload all of a sudden...

They'll spend summer - the only time you can shoot a film in Queubec, basically - twiddling their thumbs, between two of the rare LOCAL productions that got greenlit AT ALL... And one wonders WHY... But that is another story too!

At least local "talent" (we mean the thespians here) is quite philosophical about it all - and, thank GOD, they're LOGICAL about it too! Take Alexis Martin (something like the Quebec equivalent of a Woody Allen - with less talent and a girly name!) - he makes no big deal about it, understands that, with the CURRENCY PARITY prevailing now, there is absolutely NO ADVANTAGE AT ALL for American productions to come shoot their films in Montreal, Quebec, Halifax, Vancouver or even Toronto! All of these locations SUCK - and they'd rather shoot their films in a small town in Ohio rather than go out of their way to cross the damnable 48th parallel at all...

Besides, as Martin candidly and humbly admits in the video linked below, whenever American productions did come over there, they never hired him or any of the other average "local talent" like Pierre Lebeau, Céline Whatshername (not Lomez, much less Dion) or even Roy Dupuis - not even for a bit part lately! Sad, eh? Maybe I should have posted this on the Lethargic Blog instead...

Martin is told to be a "king of multi-tasking" by the local media - trying to encourage him to keep going, are they? At least he gets some kind of good press and some kind of support - it is already that! Lest this is another example of what they call over there "se peter les bretelles" - then, it would NOT be a good thing!

Alexis Martin : roi du « multi-tasking » !

The other day, I caught a lame attempt at a talk-show from the NATIONAL BROADCASTER, the SRC, French side of the CBC... "Bons Baisers de France" is misleading at first because it seems to be originating from FRANCE - and just basic knowledge of the French language lets you realize that it couldn't possibly be! Most guests are, of course, Quebeckers - and they are known for mangling their language beyond recognition! No, the show is set in Montreal alright - the nearly unknown hostess is named FRANCE, that's what it is! France Beaudoin, I do believe - one of those mercenary types that has no sense of loyalty whatsover; she displayed that when she jumped ship and came over to the SRC, abandoning the network that made her a "star" - or really remotely known at all (and that would be TVA - which also broadcasts nation-wide, but is privately-owned unlike the government-sponsored SRC with a very strict mandate... But that is another story again!)

So, France comes over and gets rewarded with her own talk-show for the length of summer, a regal reward for betrayal, even if it is only locally and all...!
And even though they broadcast nationally, only those who speak French at all will give this a shot - and that is NOT a given either! But anyway - she gets the talk-show and tries to INNOVATE the genre by working only 4 nights-a-week. Plus, she does so with the assistance of a co-host for the week! A different one each week too - woo-hoo. The one I caught a bit of was one Fred Pellerin I think - Fred who? Good question. Many in his own province would ask the very same question, really! They try and they try, but Quebec' own tiny local "star-system" only spawns obscure ephemeral celebrities - the only ones that truly pierce through are the ones who obtain lucrative commercial deals! Shooting commercials for a car dealer, the local grocery store chain or some governmental program; THAT is the only way for them to truly remain in the forgetful "public eye". Yup - this does belong on the Lethargic Blog too! Ramblings In Writ will have to do, this time...

So then - Pellerin. Because his name is FRED, his theme music for the week, whenever he makes his entrance, will apparently be The Flintstones theme. Ugh.

They can't buy celebrity, they borrow tidbits of it from their NAMESAKES. Logical.

Then Fred Pellerin speaks of his beloved native village - and invites "guests" who are villagers indeed, to talk about it some more... Great. They left their forks and torches are the door, I see...

And then I finally realize what this guy, this "star" there, really does: he's some sort of village legends pillager! He bases his short stories and/or novellas upon the local legends; which are then the ideal source material for the unimaginative local filmmakers (no Scorseses around there; I assure you...) for either movies no one will bother to go see in a theater, or even purchase the DVD of - they might as well have shot these things striaght up as made-for-TV fluff, because that is where everyone will give it a shot - and then again, THAT is not for certain either!

All-around lethargic - indeed.

The cherry on top:
the international coverage these local gems, stars and even the national festivities (even when they reach the milestone numbers of 400... or 141...?!?) wind up getting - that is, even when it is other French-speaking countries covering the stuff!

France, of all nations, should do a better job than that - after all THEY are responsible for this Quebec mess even EXISTING IN THE FIRST PLACE! And still - the prestigious PARIS-MATCH made such a monumental gaffe (hmm - maybe Gaston LaGaffe works for them?) when they actually FAILED TO DIFFERENCIATE THE CITY OF QUÉBEC FROM THE PROVINCE OF QUÉBEC... A definite no-no for the FRENCH COUSIN across the pond - heck, LE BEAU-FRÈRE (the step-brother!)

Not merely lethargic now - utterly pathetic!

And to think that high-browed journalists STILL claim that their rigor, their meticulous verve, their "professionalism" by far eclipses that of the best of them "bloggers" (and, for them, "bloggers" as "blog" have become four-letter words - yes! HA! Up yours, elitistic jerks! You're just scared shitless for your JOBS - nobody buys your RAGS anymore and, besides, your brand of journalism is either yellow or THE SELLOUT TYPE - one stands a better chance to get to the truth via a BLOG indeed - one like MINE, that is! Where there sure is CONTENT - where there sure are editorials worth reading and where THE TRUTH is PARAMOUNT; not sponsorships!

But enough ramblin'...

For now!

damn crazy canz - not cans, not canucks, and much less can-do's - canzzzzzz (as in can't-do-a-thing-but-catch-some-zzzzzzzz's!)

2008-06-23T14:21:00.000-07:00

I can't believe these crazy people living north of the 49th parallel (and, yes, as it has nearly become my habit/custom/tradition in these parts of the blogosphere, in other words on Ramblings In Writ, I shall bash them some more!)

Love Triangles can get messy, but never quite like this:
the 43 year-old cuckolded man (though he had no cause to complain so much about - he had never tied the knot with the bitch! She bore him a child - another one of those infamous bastards from Quebec; they make up about 95% of the overall "baby boom" nowadays, eh? The 666 generation, I tell ya! And speaking of 666 - well, let's not get too far ahead of ourselves now - just read on!) simply had a (bad) case of overbloated pride hurt to the max - cause the bitch had dumped him in favor of a 22 year-old hunk! A meek, wimpy boytoy, really - but still - MUCH younger than both his rival and she, I assume!

The triangle resolved itself violently - but not the way they'd do it, say, in the Bronx - no. No gun shots to the head, nope. Instead, they went at it in a three-way bloody brawl - with baseball bats and knives! Verily, even the lowest of the low among redneck white trash would NOT have gone this low! She got a baseball bat to the cranium (well-deserved, surely - she'll live!) and the two morons stabbed each other to death!!! (Well, the 43 year-old killed the 22 year-old first - hurray for REAL MEN, eh? Take note of this, bimbos, next time you think of trading in an older model for a "brand-spanking new one" - probably featuring extra features such as a bunch of unexpected STDs - eh?)

Truly, this trio PROVES that it is NOT always better "to have loved and lost rather than have never loved at all..."

You spare yourself a lot of baseball bat shots to the head and midsection knife wounds, when you skip "loving" sluts like that...!!!

She hails from LAVAL, QUEBEC too...

What is it with LAVAL WOMEN these days, EH? Julie Couillard alone is a veritable VENOMOUS VIPER of a woman who DOOMS EVERY MAN WHO FALLS FOR YOUR ENSNAREMENT TACTICS (which normally include voluptuous kisses and dumbifying sweet nothings - and that's just for preliminaries!)

Couillard owns a house in Laval too (and so did/does the other slut who caused two men to kill each other in such a barbaric way this past week-end - just short of "LA ST-JEAN-BAPTISTE" - shoot, eh? They won't be missing much - as usual! But that is another story...) --- so, to anyone who thought this is riff-raff that can't hold a job, are on welfare, drink beer and live in a cheap apartment - THINK AGAIN!!! These are home owners, in GOOD, EVEN LUXURIOUS NEIGHBORHOODS (quiet ones, it goes without saying) and they are "LLLAAAAAAAAAAAAADIES" - rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrright!

Couillard has laid waste to far more guys than the other chick though - the score is about 9-2! One or two committed suicide (the one I know about for sure did so as recently as 2006) after being embroiled with her. Another was shot full of holes - probably IN HER PLACE, by the Hell's Angels. And all the other ones saw their careers RUINED - so, escaping with their lives, in this kind of society that we live in, was NOT such a good thing after all... For we are valued for what we DO for a living, now how we approach living and just LIVE - without hurting others, without being a nuisance and, hopefully, being a helpful beacon of light to a precious few in the process...? A society like this, hence, will show no mercy to these poor saps who fell for Julie and then lost IT ALL (the lates one in that line being a FORMER minister of FOREIGN AFFAIRS, Maxime Bernier - a dumb nitwit who got elected solely based upon his good looks and nothing else, quite obviously, and who is now on the last throes of his political career - he can always be a lawyer next, eh?)

And speaking of lawyers... And 666... *lol*

I can't believe the decision rendered in a "daughter versus father over alleged unfair GROUNDING" case...! Some "case" it was to begin with - but what is even more abysmal about it is the fact that the judge went with the DAUGHTER in the case, a typical little snotty-nosed witchy-bitchy OBVIOUS PROBLEM CHILD who DARED SUE HER DAD for being rightfully grounded (GROUNDED, imagine that! What a great CRIME against the person, Liberty, Freedom and Fundamental Rights - RIGHT?!?) IT MUST BE SO - because the judge sided with the daughter all to cause a PRECEDENT - a very dangerous one too! For everybody knows this is how our DEEPLY-FLAWED "JUSTICE" SYSTEM operates: the moment there's been ONE miscarriage of justice, every similar case can become and WILL BECOME a fac-simile of that travesty of justice too! It's the domino effect; or the multiplication of errors; the cloning or mushrooming of mistakes - call it what you will! I'll tell you what I call it: IT'S PATHETIC!
It was PATHETIC that this case ever got to court in the firat place!
It is PATHETIC any shrewd lawyer will accept these type of silly cases, AND NOT FAR MORE SERIOUS ONES THAT THEY KNOW THEY HAVE SLIMMER CHANCES OF WINNING - OR CAUSING CONTROVERSY OR A "PRECEDENT" - DUH!
And it is PATHETIC that the judge -whoever it was, old man or bitchy on a power trip- did not DISMISS THIS "CASE" ON THE VERY FIRST HEARING OF IT!!!

Indeed, the 666 generation is rising to prominence - as we speak! They're not just in diapers anymore; they're setting precedents taking their old pops to court now! To HELL with parental authority, eh - QUITE LITERALLY SOO TOO!

Now, the 666 thing today is really due to the apparition of a new controversial "voice" - one that does not even master its own chosen language (or, in reality, the bastardized tongue and culture it was born into, totally against its will - but that is another sad story too!)

Someone signing as "666" has been leaving pamphlets, leaflets, flyers and signs all over the place - some are usually taped up on walls and "abri-bus" shelters of fortune (with cheap SCOTCH TAPE, yes!) whatever-you-call-those...!!!

The text is a would-be virulent critique of the government, political forces abroad too, and
Among other things, "666" has branded China as a "communist oligarchy" and vehemently denounced the Bouchard-Taylor commission on "reasonable accommodations" in regards to the "invasion" of Quebec by so many foreigners who don't give a flying hoot about French - in fact, and this perfectly lo perceive the "required knowledge" of the French language as nothing more than an annoyance and an extra hurdle on their path...! Dman right they are! After all, even "666" here, who wants to champion the language, has NO CLUE how to properly use it in written form! His latest posting (titled "AWOUAIS RÉVEILLE!" or something like that!) and his previous "work" (a leaflet titled "Le Pédant et le Vendu" meant to defame Bouchard and Taylor, indeed) are chock-full of poor syntax, poor turns of phrases and poorer still verb conjugaison that, in truth, with championing like THIS, the French language is ASSURED TO DISAPPEAR COMPLETELY OFF THE FACE OF NORTH AMERICA WITHIN ONE OR TWO GENERATIONS - MAXIMUM! Good work, "666" (all "666s" are losers anyway! And the natural enemies of... luminous moi!) But that is another story too...)

Mark my luminous words - just in case there isn't an end of the world within just a few years, that is! TWO generations - max! Et finito le Français - na Canada!

;)

Wordsmith For Hire - Editorialist Position Sought - and here is what I can do...!

2008-06-03T18:32:00.000-07:00

For those of you half-a-world-away, thinking that Canada is indeed this sort of utopia made-up entirely of polite and extra-friendly citizens - well you're WRONG!

I tell you - any given North American city (and, particularly New York and any imitative/envious Canadian "bigger than average" township!) are as NASTY, CRUDE and SICKENING as they come! You think you can find 1001 novel ways of CROAKING, right there in the middle of the street, whether it be in Beirut, Islamabad, Kandahar or, gee, I think I've ran out of trouble spots here... Ah yes; anything in the Gaza Strip will do! WELL - I'VE GOT NEWS FOR YOU: it can happen TO and/or FOR you on North American soil too!

Right now, a stabbing frenzy seems to be possessing everyone around the twin towns of doom: Laval & Montreal! Three incidents narrowingly within 24 hours, two of which in the subway and the middle one... on the highway!

A 22 year-old was stabbed while riding the metro home from work. He was in critical condition last I heard...
A 16 year-old GIRL was stabbed in the THROAT at Vendôme metro station; hey, I know that station! I remember it very well...
The motorist who somehow got stabbed while circulating on the highway must have had taken in THE WRONGEST PASSENGER HE EVER COULD HAVE - details were sketchy at pundit bandit blogging time... sorry!

I suppose that everyone should carry a pocket knife with them wherever they go now - eh? Not that I'm condoning all this - whoo-oh!

At the same time, the local bigwig *croque-mort* coroner calls for an official investigation into the suddenly now very "suspicious" death of a muslim back in 2005... What, it took you three years to notice something was not kosher there (no cross-religion joke intended!) - what kind of Clouseaus are you anyway?!? Even good old Chief Inspector Clouseau, at his most pathetic, was quicker on the uptake than THAT... Sheesh!

I wonder if any of those victims were STUDENTS? Because if they were, were part of a certain class-action suit, and had contributed above and beyond the call of duty to their STUDENT LOAN payback rip-off scam - I mean, "PLAN" - well they're gonna miss out on the big payoff... Yes, it has been settled just recently and 80,000 students who overpaid the exaggerated interest charged on those loans are going to be sharing the reward of the fair and equitable justice system there, a whopping 30 MILLION! No calculators now, students - 30 MIL divided by 80,000 lucky studious kiddies amounts to... a measly 375$ EACH! Not even enough to PAY RENT! Bummer.

I guess the stabbed ones aren't missing a thing then.

80,000 is coincidentally a similar figure to the unveiled total number of births for 2007 in that wretched area: it's 84,000 to be exact, which represents an increase of 3% when one looks at the numbers for the worst year ever - 2006. (Okay, I'm sure we'll all get plenty of more convincing contenders for "worst year ever" between now and 2013 - happy?)

84,000+ - man alive, hoes like to do it unprotected after all, eh? The fact is, statistics that come with this figure aren't GOOD - AT ALL. "One out of five" of these kids is said to be "vulnerable" they said. Whatever they mean by that! Maybe it has to do with the fact that MORE than one out of five is a certifiable little bastard? Two out of five have a screw loose too - considering the genetic make-up they come from... (It's usually the unwed, unemployed and uneducated that reproduce the most, in those parts!)
I'd say three out of five are likely to be dropouts then - just the week before the release of these numbers, other numbers had been issued and there was this one school in the heart of Montreal with a dropout rate of 94.something% - nearly 95% of its students DROPPED OUT! WOW - that has GOT to be a record "worthy" of the Guinness Book of World Records - in the least flattering section, of course!
Finally, four out of five will be condescending even if ignorant snotty little punks of the RACIST kind and 5 out of 5 will never really speak French - only some sort of mangled distortion of it, either to be called "joual" or "franglais"... Great going, Quebec - keep making froggy babies, eh?

One final 80,000+ figure for you - in the month of April alone, there were nearly 88,000 BANKRUPTCIES filings, a 19% increase when the inevitable comparison is made with the month of March... Thinsg SURE DO LOOK A LOT LIKE... recession times here (what, you though it was "beginning to look a lot like Christmas" or something?)

Just as all these bad news come out, Hillary is finally losing "officially" to Barack Obama - Geraldine Ferraro, Alexa McDonough and that Conservative chick time forgot breathe a collective sigh of relief: lesbo Hilary will *not* be joining their exclusive elite club; not just yet anyhow!

Meanwhile, ongoing trials of importance are taking place at the same time: that of this Basil creep, the one who shot policeman Daniel Tessier full of holes, last year. He is seen coming to court with his best suit, flanked by his lookalike daddy, lookalike older son (lest it's his brother?) and scumalike WIFEY... The system will probably let him off with only a few years and a slap on the wrist - after all, he was asleep and was rudely awakened by the cops - he didn't know who he was shooting, poor baby Basil!

And also at the same time, two additional accusations were made in the gruesome MICHAUD CASE; this governmental aide who was kidnapped and found dead - but it had nothing to do with her work at all, so conspiracy theorists need not apply.

I guess the autopsy raised questions that should have been obvious from the very start - but again, Clouseaus... I mean, disturbed younger man kidnaps a classy ravishing lady about 15 years older - what were the odds he would only steal from her...

Two additional accusations were finally brought against the murder suspect in the tragic, heart-wrenching case spoken of here; and they are very disturbing accusations too. For it would appear that the suspect "may also have" sexually assaulted Mrs. Nancy Michaud - twice.

The second assault is indeed an accusation of necrophilia.

This individual is realistically the only possible agressor in this case - but, in the eyes of the law, every accused party is still to be seen as "innocent until proven guilty" - hence the terminology used: always referring to him as a mere "suspect" in the case (in his local language it is "le présumé meurtrier" of course.)

I do not need to merely presume here - I can bluntly say that he is a sick bastard.

And it has nothing to do with any environment shaping him out as such; I make it personal and blame him and only him.

And the dark soul that resides within this individual.

And trust me: there are MANY like him here, in BOTH genders...
Wolves in sheep's clothing ABOUND all over North America...
The American Dream IS a scream - and a screamfest too!

So, you see, Afghan and Iraqi refugees can do much better than coming HERE - try the European Union instead! It's closer and, besides, the Euro is TOPS... right now!

Donations? Donuts - maybe...

2008-05-13T21:27:00.001-07:00

The Salvation Army wants cash donations - to subsidize the bastard-bearing and bad-upbringing "business"...?!? And "World Vision" wants us to financially endorse the HORRENDOUS regime that prevails in that part of the globe hit by that cyclone - or maybe that other part of the world hit by a series of tremors (and bad karma, if one is to believe Sharon Stone's "expert" theory...!)

Giving any sum of money to whatever charitable organization is NOT a guarantee that it will reach those who need it so badly...
And that goes at least tenfold in the Myanmar case... Hence...

NO WAY - SORRY, COUNT ME OUT!!!

luminous ramblin' all over the news headlines...

2008-05-06T14:25:00.000-07:00

Yahoo won't mind -
they can't even get the price they want
per share of the company
when a monopolistic old rival (MSN)
attempts an old-fashioned
rather hostile takeover bid...
After that,
they can't complain about ANYTHING...

Yahoo! News: World News

Myanmar cyclone death toll soars past 22,000: state radio (AP)

Gotta give it to the foreign cyclones;

they are mightier than anything America can possibly muster!

What happened to America The Powerful -

not even able to conjure up

any tornado, hurricane, tropical storm or gale

that even comes CLOSE to that magnitude...!

Golfing Baghdad's Green Zone: a course with real bunkers (AP)

Hurray for the hottest new sport in town:

THE EXTREME GOLF FEDERATION!

Historians seek public report on World War II forgeries (AP)

Better late than never, eh history buff nerds?

What took you so long -

fighting the allergies you developed while sniffing

all that dust that decorated dusty old books?

Another one to blame on the Curse of Tutankhamen, maybe?

Marines ignore Taliban cash crop to not upset Afghan locals (AP)

Causing so many locals to DIE

wasn't upsetting, nooooo...

Touching their dough - now THAT would be upsetting!

Hitting age 60, Israel gets nostalgic for the old days (AP)

What's up, Rabbi Granny? I mean, gramps?

Little Ol' Wandering Jew misses the good old NOMADIC days

when you ran around in circles in the desert 40 YEARS at a time?

Or is it the good old days of BONDAGE that you're missing there...?

Every "taste" no matter how odd is a part of NATURE, they say!

Oh yeah - I know what it is...

You miss the good old days when GOD really Was on your side!!!

Not easy falling out of favor with the Almighty -

just ask Saul about it...!!!

I guess that must be it indeed...

Because there's no way in Galilea

that you dudes are nostalgic about the good old days

when you had your Messiah with you

and you betrayed Him, rejected Him

and got Him CRUCIFIED...!

No way, eh...

+++

ramblin about smart kids - who say ''don't stay a Virgin'' - what an oxymoronic bunch...!!

2008-04-29T19:53:00.000-07:00

Don't stay a Virgin:
http://dontstayvirgin.movielol.org

Discuss this and more at:
http://ipower.movielol.org

The brat pack that put together *this* discussion is actually sly enough to use all the old tricks in order to lure people into their ''crusade'' - including luring people to watch the above video on YouTube with the picture of a sweet brunette with just enough skin showing, the misleading topics flashed before every hot-blooded male in cyber-space, and, of course, the all-important key words: *sex* and *porn*!

SHEESH!

You want a dream final score, rioters and other losers?

2008-04-28T16:55:00.000-07:00

Here's your 5-0 score...
A score that makes more sense
too!

A score that truly respects logic
and makes the NHL look like
the "fake sport" - not the WWE!

'ze end is near!

2008-04-27T18:56:00.001-07:00

The world is going down the tubes - and if anybody thinks it ISN'T, they have but to tune into their national and international news to get SET STRAIGHT!

- M4 rifle guns, capable of 1000 shots A MINUTE, will be used by the police in CHICAGO, where a crime wave has claimed dozens of lives already ever since winter ended... (I always did say that, with the good weather, ALL THE RATS started coming out - and making a mess!)

- Syria and North Korea keep being the defiant "axis of evil" that Dubya was told they were and instructed to repeatedly refer as such whenever necessary...

- The USA, meanwhile, is not stopping its showing as a bully - further aggravating things, just like Israel is when it retaliates so sharply at every thing Palestinian terrorists do... In both cases, alas, it is civilians paying the price; Americans are killing innocent Iraqis while Israel is killing whomever gets to be bombed that day, during an umpteenth retaliatory strike... Great going, you two - and you're supposed to be the "good guys" RIGHT?

- EVERYWHERE, idiocy permeates the infrastructures, the streets, the air!!!

- Our pollutive ways SIMPLY WILL NOT CURVE, BEND OR EVEN SLIGHTLY DECREASE - NOT IN THE LEAST!!! This despite numerous warning signs, heck, ALARM SIGNALS, the Earth itself is giving us (forget about Al Gore and any plethora of weirdo eggheads that you can think of! The planet itself speaks VOLUMES... But even that is not nearly enough for the masses to heed it...)

- They're shooting each other dead everywhere - over the silliest things too! Chicago is not alone in this - AT ALL. It will get to be nationwide and continent-wide before long, as the economical crisis, the dreaded recession, that was bequeathed to us by the Dubya mis-administration, gets into full gear... SO IRONIC IT ALL IS, too, since Dubya's Duds did it all in order to get GAS - and now, the root of all the evil that they've done is also the source of all this turn for the worst for the economy overall, as rising gas prices raise costs all across the board, for whatever business it is that has PRODUCT TRANSPORTATION NEEDS... DUH(bya!)

- Ah yeah; and let's not forget this, also... For one can also see, all across the board, the same nincompoopish individuals making the exact same ninny mistakes - IN EVERYTHING! From overconsumerism to bad investments; from getting the worst possible deal to seeking financial advice in ALL the WRONG places; from focusing on misguided wealth aspirations to seeking the crudest form of spiritual fulfillment! And all that does NOT include the dumb broads who can't choose a mate and the dumb blokes who can't choose a chick! ALL ACROSS THE LINE, no matter which way you look at it, ALL THE WRONGEST MOVES ARE BEING MADE, REPEATED AD NAUSEAM... AND, WORSE STILL, CLONED!!! IT IS ENOUGH TO MAKE THE CASUAL OBSERVER SICK TO HIS STOMACH - what do you think it makes *me*, the refined *luminous* observer, feel like, HUH?!?

I don't see how some can deny that this is all heading straight down THE GUTTER, straight on through chaotic anarchy!

Just look at who's making BABIES nowadays: the rabble, the lowlives, the scum of the earth. THOSE are the ones multipying like rabbits; not the good apples, the ROTTEN ones!!! Soon enough, we'll be outnumbered by these...

AND THEN WHAT?

zappin' through the channels ramblin'

2008-04-15T20:17:00.000-07:00

I was at it again and was I ever so glad to see the two dweebs from RDS/RIS (born in 1974; wet-behind-the-ears) make utter fools of themselves by cutting short the "expert" analysis by old man Yvan (of the Yukon - I wish!) on how the CH so narrowingly and 'dumb-luckily' edged out their worthier opponent, to go straight to "the highlights of a press conference held by Carbo" they said - and all they had next was the WRONG press conference fast forwarding and rewinding (shutting up Carbo, in effect; freezing him still!)

LOL LMBO ROTFL LOL

Okay enough of that - I usually ABHOR net lingo, abbreviations in general and anything else in-between!

I zap further and catch myself a *good* repeat of ROBOT CHICKEN... I needed that!

I go on from there; ah, the news!
On LCN... ugh!
Still, it's not a news bulletin at all but a repeat of one of their insufferable "topic discussion shows" - hosted by one or another hothead host that they have in spades over there...

The subject is the spread, throughout the net and other means, of very controversial propaganda... An IMAM called "Al Haiti" is doing a lot of it, it would appear (he who claims to hate all forms of technology, YET has made ample use of the web to spread his hateful message, even going as far as recording HIS rants on MP3s, to better spread them around! He won't get misquoted that way, eh? There's no misunderstanding his words though... Read on!)

And so, Al Haiti is converted to Islam since 1991 or so. Ever since his "conversion", he's come up with the following:

- all Canadian women are prostitutes (a percentage is, surely...)
- all homosexuals should be beheaded (as opposed to giving head)
- the only law to be obeyed is Allah's not human law

I actually whole-heartedly agree with that last one, as long as the phrase goes like this: "only GOD's Law is Flawless; earthly law is flawed and does not dispense true justice - ONLY GOD SHALL"

Al Haiti has plenty more where that came from - my guess is: he's trying to impress Osama Bin Laden right on time for the release of his big movie there, "Where In The World Is Osama Bin Laden?" (come one everybody - sing that title to the tune of the very well-known theme song to that old kids game show, "Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego"...! (Well, you KNOW that's the inspiration for it; that and the old "Where's Waldo" fluff! But I am digressing yet again; a no-no, even when one's rambling because then it gets even MORE confusing!)

Ahh - good old LCN, trying so hard to be the French CNN, they are...

All the while they're discussing this "hot topic" I can read plenty more SHOCKING NEWS on their ticker, see...?

"9 dead after a shootout between drug dealers and police in a favela in Rio."
WOW - Brazil has it even worse than we do! These streets of ours here have plenty of drugs too - all the drugs that you want - but we never get such fireworks as those over there...!

What we get is PATHETIC:
Some odd news item from either Gatineau or Gaspésie (?) - I can't tell anymore and cannot verify it because it is NOT on the newschannel's WEBSITE (which you can see the ad for, proudly stating that they edged out very narrowingly their competition -a recurring theme, verily- right here too...)

Yay - not.
But anyhow... The G-spot on the map there (!) where there was some news-worthy "unevent" happening... Well the "unevent" was the announced arrest of several (more) dudes for their foolish involvement in drugs and their illegal merchandizing... I really wish I could catch a confirmation of this news item; because it stated that several of the arrested individuals were really UNDER AGE... They're barely out of diapers and they're already doing crack! And selling it too! Sheesh... Maybe that IMAM there (who is from that region too - sort of) should also state that "all Canadian men -Quebecers for sure- are inept MORONS" while he's at it, eh? But that would be an even bigger overstatement and undermine the other "truths" he says...

Then I stay on a little longer - but dreading even worse anchor persons to show up, and tiring of the ticker too, I finally zap onwards...

I land on totally different news territory: the beloved RTP.
But I quickly tire of the 200-word-a-minute speed of the speakerine (otherwise very, very interesting Luso gal...!) and move on...

I tell you, satellite TV really is as bad as cable TV; there might be 5700 channels instead of just 570 or 57 - but there's still pretty much NOTHING ON!!!

DISS THE DISH, I say!
And I don't care if they cut the signal and go ALL-HD soon; they will be doing me a FAVOR then!!!

I might just find time to watch (and finally find out) WHAT IS on all of those old VHS tapes that I have all over the place...!!!

Forget DVDs, Blu-Rays and HD - I'm reacquainting myself with my VCR and VHS here!

What a teary-eyed reunion that'll be...!
As soon as they cut the regular signal - it's ON!

For now though, I just throw away the remote, in total utter disgust because, as if it wasn't enough, the last thing I catch is ANOTHER reminder that the creepy Canadiens, the hateful Habs, the moronic Montreal team managed just ONE GOAL (what a great "offensive machine" they are, eh Gildor! And he calls himself a BRUINS fan - HA!) and still they stole victory from the Boston Bruins with this lone LUCKY goal - on the power play. Again, the ref was the deciding factor. The Bruins could be LEADING this series 3-1; instead they trail it 3-1. No matter - they've already proven their point, no matter what happens next: they are as much the serious Cup contender than the CH is. Plus, they have a better work ethic and more character and guts! There's no comparison TO BE MADE...

But enough rambling.

They Killed Bruno! Not Kenny, Bruno! Oh - They Just Fired Him - Ok!

2008-03-19T14:49:00.000-07:00

Le délégué général du Québec à New York congédié (19/03/08)

I am sure my cousin São will have felt a pang in her heart at the sight of those words: "They Killed Bruno" - thinking, fearing, dreading that it might be her precious favorite, Bruno, ah, whatsislastname again... Landry? Pelletier? Sammartino? WHO KNOWS...
And who cares, eh? ;)

Le délégué général du Québec à New York congédié (19/03/08)
Bruno Fortier, un ami personnel du premier ministre du Québec Jean Charest, a été relevé de ses fonctions de délégué général du Québec à New York.
Liens associés: Zone Haute Vitesse
TQS
Plus de nouvelles sur TQS.ca

Et, par ailleurs, Jean Charest, the leader of the Liberal Party and Prime Minister of Quebec, needed to be defended himself in relation to his double or triple salary (to go with his double or triple functions, duh)

I am absolutely certain that the venerable Michelle Courchesne was among the FIRST to come to her leader's rescue...
Ahh - Mme. Courchesne...! ;)
Ok - enough about her now...

Bye Bye Bruno -
you and your abusive/incompetent kind should have NEVER have gotten the cushy jobs you get, routinely, just because it's "who you know not what you know" that regulates operations all over the place in our wretched, crooked society...
It should have been... You know it... yes...
It should have been ME!
*lol*
;)

on politics...

2008-03-04T20:47:00.000-08:00

The Republican Party is NUTS. It cannot recognizes a GOOD candidate from a lousy one if it was an actual elephant trampling all over the whole blamed party!
They actually went with McCain over Huckabee - when both can, at best, be a decent improvement over CHENEY, and no more than that!
MITT ROMNEY was their man - and they failed to see that he was the only candidate who stood any kind of CHANCE up against either B.A. Baracus there OR the Ma Barker of the Democrats race! PATHETIC. How can you be so blind?!?

The Democrat Party - speaking of which - is also as dumb as they get, and their only saving grace is that the rival party is even dumber (and, also, independents count as NOTHING in the USA! Nader, go home!)
DEMS decided to frown upon John Edwards (again) and elected instead to go original and wanting to make the silly fictional takes such as Chris Rock's film and that other forgettable film with that Cartwright character actress as a very-obvious LESBIAN Prez... Right - as if either scenario is close to reality and what we want to see in a ('nother) possible scenario: the World War III scenario! Barack Obama cannot subdue or even dissuade Mahmoud and the "Axis of Evil" with Chris Rock-type of humor - he isn't even sufficiently funny for that! And the LEZ PREZ fantasy might titillate Jack Nicholson - but it will not fly high like a lesbian seagull, no baby! It will FRY - that's what it will do, when we all get nuked! What do you think Islam will think of the once "mighty USA" if they are led by a woman - an UNVEILED WOMAN to boot (with probable rug between her teeth - but those are just rumors, of course!)
That'll be the death of US ALL! Jack's support for Hillary seemed to have translated into the kiss of DEATH too, anyway - ever since this was made public, she's been losing to Obama! And speaking of which...

Jack's support is killing Hillary's chances (not the only factor either, but it was the catalyst...) and Hillary's dream is being the death of many people's aspirations. Whereas Obama's dream will likely be only the death of his lone person and only his person... "Osama versus Obama" only looks cool for two second on the imaginary marquee anyway... "Bin Laden versus Barack" - same difference! (Ok - I KNOW, I KNOW! Make it "Osama Bin Laden vs Barack Obama" and shove it in the "WON'T HAPPEN" filer - OKAY?!? Good.)

Basically there's nothing new under the sky and the star-spangled banner too - they have ALWAYS made the WRONG CHOICE! Even JFK was the bad guy to win! Nixon... Reagan... George Bush over Michael Dukakis... DUBYA, twice over?!? Terrible, HORRIBLE track record! AMERICANS CAN'T TELL WHAT'S WORTHY FROM WHAT'S FLUFF - WHAT'S GENUINE FROM WHAT'S MERELY POSING... OR WHAT'S RIGHT FROM WHAT'S WRONG ANYMORE! Instead of decent election between Romney and Edwards or Huckabee and Giuliani, we will get a Vietnam vet going up against either the RACE card or the GENDER card - EITHER WAY, A LOSE-LOSE COMBINATION!!!

But since politics are truly the arena that makes it crystal-clearer to all that "WINNER" does rhyme with "LOSER" and that there is so little difference between the two ultimately - it really doesn't matter at all, does it!?

After all, WHOEVER THEY ELECT, the world's going down the tubes, people!

It's all about the number 23... eh

2008-02-23T19:53:00.000-08:00

No - not THAT "number 23"...

No, not Jim Carrey the comedian-wannabee-serious-actor-&-Oscar-contender
- try Jim Carey, former goaltender-extraodinaire and flash-in-the-pan-never-heard-from-again,
ever since he got traded to the team he should have shone bright for, his hometown Boston Bruins! But that is still not it here - although, who knows; Carey might have been 23 when he got traded to Boston?

Truth is though, we're in the right area or field, but with the wrong individual still... From the Bruins we have to shift our focus (alas) to the arch-rival Canadiens and a man who did WEAR number 23 throughout his career (goalies usually have a number in the 30s - or a "1"... Or a "0" as it so happened! But it is another story...)

The man we are talking about is neither funny (despite testimonial tonight to the contrary - in private he allegedly is... So what!) nor a goalie, no - although he did have a largely defensive role to play in his playing days, being labeled a "defensive offensive forward" (how confusing is that!)

He must have spent, overall, oh, I'd say 23 years in Montreal (in various functions) and yet he STILL doesn't quite speak French fluently!

I never knew, up until tonight, that his middlename was "Michel" (is that a bit of revisionism on the part of his P.C. big sister, I wonder? Maureen Newby -misspelled NEWBIE by the silly goofs of the RDS network; now that was a hoot- is the sis in question and she made a lengthy speech to honor her "generous little brother" who is a saintly uncle to her SEVEN children... SEVEN! She giggled when she revealed that too, in the middle of her speech, to an incredulous crowd at the damnable Bell Center in Montreal! Although she is an Ontario teacher, she insisted to deliver her entire speech in French too... To make a point! Or, perhaps, not to incite another one of those infamous (and senseless) Montreal riots! As a teacher, she claims to have been the most popular of all with her pupils once they found out she was "number 23's" sister... They asked for trading cards, autographs - she would in turn coerce the silly kids into putting in extra efforts and get extra-good grades before she honored their requests... I couldn't possibly refrain to mention here that I once owned "number 23's" ROOKIE CARD (an odd head shot, at a time when they always had medium standard shots of players "in typical face-off position" OR a crude, badly taken "in action" pic...) And so I had that card and what did I do with it? I sold/swapped it for a combination of periodicals, collectibles and cash! No future considerations though! Ha. But I am digressing now...)

The "number 23's" sister had been preceded to the crude podium by another lady, younger with very exotic earrings (too exotic for Montreal!) who is but a "friend" of the family... Ha. HER speech was over-praising "number 23" and all, with the exception of a few French words, in English. At least she and Maureen there DID name "number 23's" deceased WIFE and M.I.A. and presumed to be dead daughter, Laura...

SOMETHING "NUMBER 23" DID NOT DO, INCREDIBLY, WHEN HIS OWN TURN CAME TO SPEAK...!

I am talking about, of course, Bob Gainey, current general-manager of the Montreal Canadiens and former player, coach and G.M. elsewhere too...

Bob took the time to single out his TWO personal "all-stars" - Doug Jarvis and Guy Carbonneau, just because they happen to be the only two guys who centered for him when he played, basically...

DOUGIE and GUY... And not a mention of the wife or the daughter who is also gone?
BOB... What were you thinking there?!?

Fittingly, for most of the game that followed the sad ceremony (anything partly hosted by old goat Dick Irvin tends to be sad - since 1903, maybe?!?) the damn Canadiens TRAILED 2-0... TWO OMISSIONS, TWO GOALS ALLOWED DID YOU IN... So very fitting indeed! (The hometown "Habs" wound up losing it 3-0, while the rival Boston Bruins won a third in a row on the road, 5-3 over the Lightning in Tampa Bay - without any Bruins rookies being arrested for theft or worse the day before the game, like it happened to the Canadiens when THEY went down to Tampa...!)

Dougie Jarvis - he looks more like a BUTLER than a 4-time Stanley Ashtray winner than EVER! The Avengers Mansion butler though has a nicer hairline...!
And GUY... A.k.a. Carbo... That make-believe coach without the slightest clue is a posterboy for DUMB LUCK! How can any man remember to honor THAT and forget to even mention ONCE the woman who bore his children and brought them into this wretched world...?!? (Granted, Carbo is to be equated with Laura - and that may be even more baffling, so I won't get into THAT...)

Several old-timers were BOTHERED to come to this silly ceremony too (which is nothing more than the raising of another carpet up to the ceiling, to collect dust forevermore once all the way up there...) Among them, several guys nobody remembers: Dave Maley, Serge Boisvert (never to be confused with Savard, no) and Mike Lalor... Others are "local legends" of sorts: Sergio Momesso, Lucien Deblois, Ryan Walter, Bryan Skrudland... And then there was Mats Naslund who, inexplicably, boarded a plane for THIS...?!? Naslund ended his playing days with the Boston Bruins but he responded to the invitation to come and reunite with only a few of the lucky bastards of 1986 who stole one (Stanley trashcan) under incomprehensible coach Jean Perron and the leadership of captain Bob Gainey also (oh, and there was that guy, Pat, between the pipes, stealing goals from the superior competition!) So, Naslund came back for this thing honoring Gainey AND the 22nd anniversary (came close to being the number 23, eh) of that travesty... uh. championship I mean to say! And then both he and coach Jean Perron get SNUBBED and outright IGNORED during the whole speech... sheesh! BOB! What a lousy host ye art, on top of that!

They lose the game that follows (to an unimpressive Colombus Blue Jackets team coached by former Gainey guy, Ken Hitchcock. Ken sure outcoached Gainey's OTHER Guy there... HA!) and with the trading deadline approaching, certain players' free agency looming and flagrant flaws up and down his (only two days ago deemed to be) team with "great chemistry this year," we will be able to see how bad a G.M. Bob can be too!

And the ghosts of his wife and daughter are okay with this - they are the temporary new ghosts of the "Forum" at the Bell Center (no Bell Witch jokes intended - at all) and both are pissed off at Bob, I'm sure, for not being even alluded to in his speech there... (Gee, BOB - if you need a speech-writer, I AM YOUR MAN! You could have ended your speech beautifully this way: "this is such a great night, for which I am extremely grateful to all of you here. The only thing that would make it better would be if my wife and daughter Laura were also here to share this with us... MERCI MONTRÉAL!" See - THAT is how you do it, BOB! But, instead, you chose to do it so absurdly and topsy-turvily, by shouting your "merci montréal" right at the beginning of your speech and pointing out that you were doing things upside down on purpose too... No, Bob, you didn't do things upside down; you did them STUPIDLY. Now keep it going and make a couple of bad trades that place your team where it truly belongs: in the dumps!)

To those of you who think that I am being too rough or too hard on Bob here, eh, hockey is a rough game too. Oftentimes quite unnecessarily so (like Bob was in his playing days, sometimes - his entire era sure was) and the omisison in the speech is NOT made up for at all (IMHO) by the fact that all of the Canadiens (were) wearing No. 23 jerseys with "Gainey" nameplates. The Blue Jackets, whose head coach, Ken Hitchcock, was Gainey's coach with Dallas in 1999, each wore No. 23 jerseys for the ceremony that will be donated to the Gainey Foundation, a charitable organization established in the memory of Gainey's wife Cathy, who died of cancer, and his daughter Laura, who was lost at sea in December 2006.

Cathy and Laura had to be mentioned by "Mr. Strong Silent Type" himself there...

That was extremely distasteful and a lack of tact that goes beyond mere etiquette; it borders upon INHUMANITY... And the commercial pauses on RDS didn't help matters much either... In relation to those jerseys' auction, they ran a contest too, focusing on the day's "honor" and the schmuck garnering this honor. This was, of course, another one of those "really easy contests" (in appearance) that asked three too-easy-to-be-for-real questions (basically, the answer, each time, was... Bob Gainey! Duh.) and what is the prize to be won? Tickets and airfare to go see the Habs LOSE to the Bruins in Boston. (You don't think you will win -or rather steal- them all, do you, Hab-nots?) The contest is called "Les Grandes Rivalités" I do believe, and it does focus on the perennial Boston-Montreal rivalry... They showed clips of games and I'll give credit when it's due: the clips selection is evenly picked, as we see many Bruins goals (Neely on a breakway - always a joy to behold!) BUT then there are the dumb acting bits, utilizing the services of one Yvan Lambert (or is it Yvon? Who knows - and who cares!) and Pierre Bouchard, former goon turned brainiac? I don't think so! But he does WRITE - somehow! Anyway... Lambert and Bouchard are in a barber shop, well-groomed and acting vanitous when they are joined by a gruffy, long-haired and wild-bearded mock-Boston Bruins player! The throwback to the 1970s (when many Habs had long hair too!) is an obvious impostor meant to ridicule the competition and, in fairness, they do get him a shave and a haircut... But only to leave him with tiny scars all over his FACE, giving Bouchard the chance to deliver the inane line "c'est la coupe Gerry Cheevers, eh?"
HA. That's right, Piiiiierre, Gerry Cheevers did win the Stanley Cup - twice! ;) Two of the most well-deserved NHL championships of the last 50 years! (There weren't many overall, again IMHO! But that is another story!)

This is annoying, doubly so due to the fact that they used a testimonial from Cheevers during Gainey's ceremony, only to overstate the fact that Bob was physically solid in his bodychecks... Gerry Cheevers was solid too, by his own admission, but gee - he was a goalie! Bob should have been KILLED for DARING to bump into the opposiion's GOALIE! Isn't that the unwritten rule, in the barbaric NHL? Never mind...

Gainey's number became the 13th retired by the Canadiens, who will celebrate their centennial in 2009.

His No. 23 joined Nos. 1 (Jacques Plante), 2 (Doug Harvey), 4 (Jean Beliveau), 5 (Bernie "Boom-Boom" Geoffrion), 7 (Howie Morenz), 9 (Maurice "Rocket" Richard), 10 (Guy Lafleur), 12 (Dickie Moore and Yvan Cournoyer), 16 (Henri Richard), 18 (Serge Savard), 19 (Larry Robinson) and 29 (Ken Dryden).

What - you can't count too, Habs-not?
What happened to the numbers 3, 6, 8, 11, 13, 14, 15, 17, and 20 through 28...?!?
What - no one worth a penny ever wore THOSE - in the "Glorieux" history? Nooooooo - it cannot be!!!
They really could have given one of the many available slots to Yvan, so he wouldn't have to share it with Dickie - that is quite queer, y'know!
Anyway...!

So, number 23 is there now, with the other Habs has-beens...

See if I care...!

The only number 23 I care about is the one in association with Dr. Pepper - right here baby!

And you can ***** the rest...!

that's news to me... as always

2008-02-21T17:27:00.000-08:00

Germany outrages the world when they decide to teach what the Holocaust was through... comic-books. It is indeed outrageous, yes; haven't they heard that comics are PASSÉ in Reichland? Dc's Didiot and Marvel's EnQuesada have sure RUINED the medium beyond repair... Besides, with the internet, ethernet and intranet occupying our lives 99.9% of the time now, who wants to pick up a rag printed on cheap paper anymore?!? All it does is smudge your hands (the ink comes off cheap paper!) and you can get bored for free everywhere else!

A woman pretends to be the oldest person EVER - in modern times anyhow! One hundred and twenty years-old, she claims to be... Can we really believe this old bag? Isn't she really trying to garner some perks for being the alleged elder stateswoman of the WORLD...? Getting a free ride, free meals, free limo rides AND your 15 minutes of fame on top of that is worth the lie, is it not?
Me, I'm skeptical because, just today, I was met with a bunch of highly hypocritical old bags who LIED through their ooky old yellowish teeth! They LIE as they BREATHE (still) - and the only wisdom they've truly acquired over the years is simply the refinement of the ability to LIE! I mean, come on now - a tart will not get wiser as she grows old and SENILE! They can be opportunistic on top of hypocritical though; as I believe to be the case with this alleged 120 year-old, yes...

KOSOVO now; is this silly little place truly going to be THE trigger for the Armageddon?!? Not the Middle-East? Not Irak? Not Iran?!? KOSOVO?!? The way it is forming two distinct clans - the U.S. and buddies on one side and the Usual Suspects on the other... Seems like everyone has underestimated those silly Serbs and their influence upon the rest of the gullible world, eh... They won't let Kosovo go! They're worse than Saddam's obsession with Kuwait! They just ransacked the U.S. embassy over this - and they swear on Slobodan's snout that the Western world will NOT take away Kosovo from their grasp! Sheesh - relax, Serbies! It's only real estate! If you're so keen on gaining more ground, buy stock in those Martian colonies-to-be or something...! And then get shanghaied into space, where, soon enough, Kosovo will be nothing but a small, trivial memory! Serbs In Space - that'd solve *your* problems, wouldn't it? Me, I'll be closely followed into space by all of *my* problems, I think...
(I say Serbs In Space, they say Fish In Space - ha.)

And speaking of the devils...
I can't believe the GALL and TENACITY also of some of my adversaries... THEY know who their sorry numbers are! I have but one tiny nagging & puzzling question, really... WHY do they insist, WHY?!? They've seen my resolve; they've tasted my poise and own brand of perseverence AND tenacity...! Heck, they've gotten a taste of TRUE JUSTICE, THROUGH ME! (They wouldn't have gotten any if it wasn't for me - not on this earth, they wouldn't! They would have had to wait, LIKE MOST EVERYBODY ELSE, for GOD ALMIGHTY Himself to give it to them, STICK it to them, on Judgment Day! But we're getting ahead of ourselves again - aren't we? Yeah!)

So they've seen IT ALL - with me... Luminous little me!
And yet, they keep TRYING!
Trying my PATIENCE, really...
INCREDIBLE!
Incredibly pathetic, that is.

Word to the not-so-wise: don't bother anymore.
I AM WARNING YOU.
Don't tempt me, adversaries of mine - the temptation to decimate your numbers is already very, very strong...
And I don't have to lift a finger either, pallies...

You've been warned.
À bons (ou mauvais - têtes de pioches!) entendeurs - allez vous faire foutre!
;)

that's news to me... almost

2008-02-20T16:44:00.000-08:00

Here I was, again watching the newsfeed from the old stomping grounds (whether it was on cable or via my satellite provider is for you to wonder and try to guess; not for me to tell!) and I must say that I can't stop laughing whenever I indulge in this stuff - seriously, Comedy Central has nothing on these guys!

They lament on and on about "La Réforne Scolaire" (on TQS) and underline its necessity due to the fact that kids over there have no clue how to spell anymore... But the thing is, they are really talking about LA RÉFORME SCOLAIRE - of course.

Ok, a typo happens to the best of them (and me, I get whole sentences messed up real bad whenever my slow connection "hangs" while I type away...! So, I do sympathize, yes - but it was funny that they took SO LONG to notice their typo and correct it! There they were lamenting the fact kids are clueless and even the news broadcast makes such a glaring mistake...! Priceless. Only in Québec!)

Onwards to some so-called "cultural news" then - Sandrine Kiberlain is shooting a film on top of the famed Mount Royal (where I once shot some scenes too, for "The Wedding Dress," a short film so short, my scenes were left on the cutting room floor and trampled on by the assistant-director! But that is another story... At least I was on Mount Royal in the SUMMER, not in the dead of winter!) and so, on top of the mountain, Sandrine K says that she keeps "mean people at a distance" (she must see them come from a mile away, of course, while up there) and only surrounds herself with nice people. Sandrine? They're really not nice, you know... They're called HYPOCRITES. Québec is chock-full of them. Get on with the program!

Some people have never heard of wolf in sheep's clothing - or they think it to be strictly the stuff of fairy tales, eh?

Sandrine K, once in Quebec, would normally be very lonely on top of that mountain, if she truly was kept company exclusively by "nice people" only!

Louis Morissette, for example, is definitely in the category "anything BUT nice" but then again so are many French compatriotes of the ingenue/film director...

After that bit of "news" we get shanghaied into sports, or so it seems...
They can't stop raving about the first ever huge comeback-from-behind win in Canadiens history that occurred just last night at Montreal's Bell Center. They've stolen championships, they've won a flurry of one-goal, by-the-skin-of-their-teeth "victories" but they'd never in their long, long history come back from a 5-0 deficit. Ever. And they did it on the 19th of February of the year of our Lord 2008, against the New York Rangers who, usually, had their number... Whoopee-doo. The inane fanboys are dreaming of another "undeserved championship" again - dream on, nerds! But that is not the point I am getting at here... of course!

What made it doubly special, that "historical feat" of the 19th, was that this happened in the 100th anniversary of the franchise. And, on the 20th, it just so happened that they concocted a mini-spectacle to commemorate the birthday of one of the most simplistically-named, hastily-put together franchise of all-time...! And they assembled all the most famous local fanboys that they could find to put this together, because they knew it'd be a "labor of love" for them too...!
Denis Bouchard directing (what exactly - traffic on stage?)
something "written" by George-Hébert Germain (what did he write here - a timetable? The anecdotes to be recited by some of the Canadiens' old-timers? They could be but a revised (in not-so-pure revisionistic history fashion) pack of lies then! But I digress...)
with music by François Dompierre (what, true classic music wasn't good enough for the Habs?!? More likely it would have gone to waste there... I say classical music because this is an OSM show! Yes - the Orchestre Symphonique de Montréal is the true culprit here - and their mercenary maestro, Kent Nagano, is the mastermind behind it all too! His vain efforts to generate interest for the OSM amongst all strata of society there -something all previous Chefs d'Orchestre in place failed to do quite miserably- included a themed-concert about Terry Fox and another about that General Dallaire who basically has, as his claim to fame, the dubious honor of having witnessed a genocide taking place right before his eyes; and not having done all that much about it. That's an anniversary coming up soon too; the 15th, maybe? But they'd rather focus on the Habs' 100th and also Juste Pour Rire's 25th - read on...)

So, this would-be grandiose spectacle is put together (just as hastily as the Canadiens franchise was both named and established, way back in 1908 - their favored beer brand and sponsors, for their part, claim to be "jeune depuis 1903" - but that's another story!) and is titled... "les Glorieux."

HA.

I found it much more appropriate that, come commercial break, they announced the coming to town of the show of shows (as far as Broadway may go anyways; outdoors, on the grandest stage of all, we will get to see much better, I just know it... Again, READ ON...!) and I do mean... "les Misérables."
(Not kidding ya at all! The miserable, atrocious state of Montreal's infrastructures is now officially at the SUPRA-ALARMING stage! They can't repair the roads anymore; the moment they patch up one of their infamous "nids de poule," another appears and another and another... And the one they did repair fizzles and unravels too, in record time... By city officials' own admission, the work is always TO BE DONE for the roads, bridges and overpasses are in constant need for maintenance and restoration - 365 days a year! They were saying that and showing examples of streets that, even though only two years old, are in complete desolate state... And images of an overpass that is being DEMOLISHED BEFORE IT COLLAPSES ALL ON ITS OWN followed... And then, the cherry on top as far as I am concerned, a bridge I know very well from years past, le Pont Lachapelle, is so old it apparently has its days NUMBERED - by the looks of it! AND TO THINK THAT I WALKED ON THAT - AND SO DID MY DAD! I don't want to die due to flawed Montreal infrastructures; if I must croak, let it be due to my own flaws, ok? LOL But I am digressing again...)

Come OOOOON now - what was ever so "glorious" about the likes of Maurice, Guy, Henri, Yvan and, say, Bernard "Boom-Boom" Geoffrion?!? Athletes should have NEVER been placed upon a pedestal - EVER. Nagano or Bouchard said that these were the modern-day "heroes" - what happened to firemen all of a sudden?!? Or GOOD cops? Germain commented that it was the collective dream of a nation, anglos or "Canadiens-Français" alike, to be a Canadiens player (if you were a brainless boy or a "garçon manqué" I figure...!) and/or to see the team compete and win it all... Since when does the majority of any given people decide to indulge in something that is TRULY GOOD, George? (Tu peux ben être un George, le Germain...!)
Throughout history we've seen one constant: the masses always make the WRONG CHOICE. They chose Barabbas over Jesus, didn't they? They chose to forget about Moses and venerate a newly-crafted Golden Calf, didn't they? And they elected Dubya twice - didn't they? Verily, the only good thing about the Habs "uniting all Quebeckers, anglo or franco alike' is that they provided a DISTRACTION, so that no one in the silly province of Quebec were thinking of staging a "Révolution Tranquille" or mounting an endless and pointless debate over the validity of a French-speaking nation in North America AS LONG AS THE DAMN CANADIENS WERE PLAYING HOCKEY!!!

And, yes, calling the likes of Jean Béliveau and Pierre Bouchard (PIERRE... BOUCHARD?!? Sheesh...) "les Glorieux" reeks of idolatry (very misguided one at that) and is a sad, sad step backwards for humanity - close to being the same as when Greeks and Romans really believed there was a bunch of he-men and hedonistic ladies on top of Mount Olympus...!

Don't they have enough nicknames as it is? They're the DAMN HABS... the Canadiens... the Cans!!! The "Bleu, Blanc, Rouge"... BUT THERE IS NO GLORY THERE - THERE NEVER WAS!

Wanna know what a true GLORIOUS line-up is ALL ABOUT?
Center: JESUS-CHRIST
Right-wing: ARCHANGEL GABRIEL
Left-wing: ARCHANGEL MICHAEL
Defense: ARCHANGELS RAPHAEL & URIEL
and goaltender: ST. PETER!
(The back-up goalie must be... St. Paul?)
(And the second line must be assorted apostles!)
(Third and fourth lines: a mix of cherubs and saints!)

If you score against this truly ALL-STAR LINE-UP,
they let you not into the damnable "Hall of Fame" but rather, they let you into the Hall of Halls - Heaven!
The General Manager and Coach of that TRULY GLORIOUS TEAM Is, of course, GOD THE FATHER!

See - no silly ashtray trophy to win here (or trash can; whatever it is nowadays, Lord Stanley's piece of kitchen ware is no longer a "cup" and much less a facsimile of the Grail...!)
THERE IS MUCH, MUCH BETTER TO WIN!
Start practicing for THAT...!

But enough about this - for now! ;)

Onwards to the WEATHER!
Ah - something special on the menu for tonight, so tells me the curvaceous (even in the bitter cold of Quebec City) Colette Provencher!
A LUNAR ECLIPSE!
Wow!
And they quickly go to the authority on the subject (the boring spokesman for the Planetarium de Montreal! Again - Montreal! Arrrgghhh!) who quickly notes that, around 10pm and 11pm, when we do see the moon getting colorful (either a bright orange or a blood-red, uh, red!) it will simply due to the fact that light emanating from US, from the Earth, will be illuminating the moon, for once... How's that for turning the tables, eh? And so, the hidden message is loud and clear here: don't even think for a SECOND that it's the end of the world being announced on the greatest marquee of all there - even if the moon is crimson and cloverish! Nope, folks; it is NOT the end and no big deal at all!

Well, astronomer dude, think about it for two seconds instead of being the automaton that repeats ad nauseam what you've been taught...

Ever since lunar eclipses have occurred and been chronicled, the Earth has CHANGED. You're with me on that, so far? Good!

The light pollution has grown exponentially - and it is not the only form of pollution at all that has multiplied on our pathetic planet, of course...

So, the prophecy you dread so much that you have to explain to the masses, each time there is a lunar eclipse, WHY the moon turns a certain color, CANNOT be discounted... And, in fact, it is VALIDATED! For it said that, when the moon would turn BLOOD RED, the End would be imminent. And, quite obviously, it is the end of Earth, not the end of the moon! Since the light emanating from the EARTH will in effect accomplish the color scheme that the moon will get for an hour's time (just about) we can therefore assess that the next few lunar eclipses should be THE "blood-red moon" the prophecy alluded to, for the light coming through our atmosphere as the sun is in our back NOW is very different from both the light and the atmosphere we had during all the previous lunar eclipses! The planet wasn't the same - the sun itself wasn't as old nor as prone to flare up as it is now! Hence, NOW we can truly expect THE blood-red moon OF SIGNIFICANCE... Ominous significance and foreboding, aye! With all that in mind... Enjoy the lunar eclipse! :)

IN OTHER NEWS:
Juste Pourrir (euh... I mean, Pour Rire) also known as Just For Laughs is exporting itself in 2009, just (!) in time for its 25th anniversary. Yay.
Those are the only true exportables Quebec has, isn't it: second-rate artistics and lab rat assistants! Sheesh!
No wonder those who get the nod to get exported will go so willingly too; the grass is more greener, it IS everywhere else, while in Quebec, it's DEAD most of the year...

Another anniversary that goes hand-in-hand with the Habs' 100th is the whole blamed province of Québec's 400th! The "indefatigable" Denis Bouchard was involved in that one too, earlier in the year, and will be again as more festivities are organized all-throughout this 400th harsh winter and the rest of the year too... (lol)

Bouchard, a native from my old stomping grounds true-and-true (he even attended the same high school as I!) had this inane comment about an earlier outdoors show in which he "directed" traffic once again... He said "they survived the winter 400 years ago, the least we can do is survive a couple of hours too!" (I paraphrase, of course; why bother to dig out the quote, ad verbatim, huh? For the record though, he might have said "we can tolerate the cold for two hours too" instead of speaking of survival for his actors on stage...!)

The thing is, Denis, they did NOT survive, 400 years ago!

The first settlers in what was to become Québec City had no idea what they were getting into - and they all died that first winter here! New fools were brought in the moment the ice melted and spring made it possible for more ships from France to come by, bringing rats and pestilence with them too, but that is another story...
Les Filles Du Roy were the main attraction...! ;)
And I'm sure fur coats became the norm instantly in large part thanks to them!

I can imagine Denis skipping History class in our old alma mater... *lol*
(They called it "foxer les cours" back then!)

Just like a Denis to do so too!

Anyhow...

nuff ramblin!

much ado about ramblin'

2008-02-17T12:19:00.000-08:00

What's so important about a crown or really a fancy little BOGUS title such as "queen of soul" - huh?

Beyonce's Grammy kerfuffle has been the subject of much debate - and quite frankly IT IS ALL SO SILLY! For Tina Turner is HER queen; she did say "hail the queen" - we never heard "of soul", did we? Tina is the queen of MANY things! She truly paved the way for Beyoncé; not Aretha! Tina is the queen of ROCK! She is the queen of RHYTHM! She also played the Acid queen in The Who's rock-opera turned cinematic feat, "Tommy" but that is another story...
Her dad weighed in and now it is set for a battle of the heavyweights, I suppose?!? (Aretha is HEAVY, you know; I'd rank her as nothing less than a superheavyweight, in fact! But that is not R-E-S-P-E-C-T, I suppose...!)

67% of surveyed peeps out there said that Aretha was the true queen of soul; while the remaining 33% went with Tina and therefore Beyoncé's bold call... Hey - this is all very subjective here! After all, even with true monarchy, the case could be made that someone else could or should be wearing the crown of the United Kingdom's royal heritage - and if that's the case for the most celebrated royal family, it is the case for all the other ones that remain out there!

We could go on about these fake queens too, indefinitely - bogus highnesses such as the "queen of vampires" for instance. Who is she really: Vampirella, Lilith or the pathetic Akasha... huh?!?
Who is the queen of the sea - Mera, Ariel or a surface-dweller such as Bélit, who was but a mere buccaneer but still... (Plus she had the title of "queen of the Black Coast" already - despite being caucasian and all... Oh well, she had dark hair, at least! A true and true sufferer of the Tarzan syndrome there! But that is another story again...)

Who is the true queen of mean now - since Leona Helmsley died, who can it be?!? Martha Stewart? No - she's so nice and tidy! Oprah Winfrey? She's so charitable! Barbara Walters? Everyone's lost interest a long time ago... Rosie O'Donnell? Ahh, NOW you may have a candidate there...!

BUT... all this is so POINTLESS!

Nobody cares who's the queen of what - or who's the king of whatever either!

For the record though, I spurn Aretha too - but in favor of Ella!

ELLA, ELLE L'A! As the lovely Frenchwoman France Gall sang so well! And, unlike others out there, I do not allow the mere fact that they "are no longer with us" to usurp the throne and give the crown to another...! With a real throne and crown, of course, we must find the next-of-kin and heir apparent; but since even real royalty is vastly FOR SHOW only nowadays, what do you think my stance is regarding bogus, vastly honorific only titles and crowns, eh?

No, my brethren, there is no death boundary here; or rather there shouldn't be! And so shall it be done - on the TLB PRIME NETWORK, anyhow!

The queen of the Fado is still Amalia
The queen of soul may be Aretha
But the queen of rock is Tina
The queen of BLACK MUSIC overall is Ella
and the queen of mean isn't Leona - cause I've found worse examples in a dozen other specimens! For their names and sad and sorry cases, check out the LAMBASTING BLOG! *LMBO*

You must admit that, with my system, it gives a whole new meaning to "the Queen is Dead - Long Live the Queen!"

It applies to the King version too... of course!

A runaround of the pathetic around ya!

2008-02-13T16:50:00.000-08:00

Aren't those Yankees pathetic? A-Rod sets out to test the free agency waters and quickly realizes no one will have either his bloated ego or his inflated salary - and he goes back to the damn yankees with his tail between his legs, knowing full well that he'll have to make concessions now, to make up for lost revenue he cost the Yanks merely by going for free agency in the first foolish place! Then the Rocket denies taking HGH virulently - and now claims, before congress, that it was his wife that took it?!? Clemens has become such a disgrace since he left the Red Sox! And the cherry on top: petit Pettitte! Petty Pettitte? Anyways, it is not relevant for the case at hand... Now he has the gall to say that "misremembered Clemens" when he confirmed that the latter had indeed taken performance-enhancing drugs... PATHETIC!

Aren't those Canadiens pathetic? Carbo is one of the most clueless coaches in the NHL today - a poster by for DUMB LUCK if there ever was one (and there were several candidates for that dubious title in Montreal throughout the years, YES!) Then his rambuctious gang of punks on ice get into trouble off the ice - showing their true colors in the process - and he can't hold the troops together nor hide his shame! Ryan O'Byrne and Tom Kostopoulos must bring back "fond memories" of teammate John Kordic to coach Carbo - eh, Ti-Guy? May the three-game losing streak you're on now get repeated on and on throughout what's left of this season and what's left of your coaching career as well! Unlike Claude Julien, you are one of those guys who will NOT be finding a job opportunity in Boston or any major American city once it's over for you in your hometown... Maybe Colombus will give you a job - if that franchise still exists by then! As for your boss, Ti-Guy - G.M. Bob should have taken more time off to properly mourn his dear daughter Laura, IMHO. His loyalty should be with his family, not the damn CH. And while Carbo is shamed by his own current players and memories of his teammates that were even worse, Bob Gainey sees his very own former co-star, also a Guy, show without a shadow of a doubt that the Canadiens legacy leads only to no good as Guy Lafleur's genes are criminally-inclined crap and not cup-winning championship caliber at all! It shows you how truly lucky and not WORTHY they were, back in their youth... Pathetic!

Aren't those NBA west coast contenders pathetic? The Phoenix Suns most of all - for ever hoping that washed-up Shaq Attack can help their cause! It looks "good" on paper: Captain Canada and Superman Shaq on the same team - but it looks mostly tacky and silly as well! The despicable Lakers adding Pau Gasol to form a formidable duo with the sneering Kobe - brillant idea on paper too. But it won't bring a championship to Bryant's posse - because what else does it have going for it, that posse? And now the Mavs - gee, I had respect for Mark Cuban but now that is shaken too! Letting go up to seven players for Jason Kidd and a reject?!? Granted one of the guys he gives up can become an immediate free agent (Jerry Stackhouse) and come back to the fold within 30 days; the standard wait to re-sign with a team that just traded you! (You gotta love that NBA and its ways of conducting business!) But losing two draft picks for a reject and four players for Kidd is ridiculous! Kidd could not bring the Nets over the top - he will not be the Mavericks' savior either! His "unmistakable mandate" to bring the franchise he's traded to (and his sagging career) a championship (at long last) will go UNFULFILLED. Especially because the team depleted itself of any depth just to acquire their alleged "savior" - which team officials are certain is the perfect fix for all of their woes... HA! What a joke! To do this sort of overhaul NOW is pure folly; it is mid-season pretty much and the team will have too short a time to truly gel and ready itself for the daunting task at hand; a championship run! They can't do it now! And all of these western teams forget also one thing: this is the Boston Celtics' RENAISSANCE year! They made their blockbuster moves at the RIGHT TIME; before the season started! The Celts have been on a tear ever since and getting acquainted with each other better and better each game so that, when the playoffs do roll around, they will be like a veteran team gunning for their umpteenth championship together (and they sure are the franchise with the most anyway!) Basically, all these other franchises suffer as they've always suffered (whether they admit or not) from Celtic envy! Pathetic!

But all of that is just insignificant (even though "big money") sports!
Nothing to do with the most pathetic of all - the world of politics!
Politics shape our lives; and to see all these clowns vie for the attention (and all-important votes) of millions upon millions... That is quite pathetic too! All these candidates are like little kids going for the same piece of candy! They'd do anything to make this "happen" - we know it. They campaign ad nauseam, through rain and tornadoes! All to get the honor of being the next incompetent in power! Of course, it is a prestigious spot; the "most powerful man (or lesbian) in the world" - wow! Obama could be it - and get shot dead in the process. Such is the consensus regarding the outcome of THAT "power trip"... It could be Hillary too - and imagining a lesbian in the Oval Office may not be good for the economy, but it will do wonders for the country's morale, I figure! *lol*
Of course, it could not be one of DEM in power at all, but one of THEM: the Republicans! And the only one who wasn't going to be entirely boring (Mitt) has bowed out of the race... So it is either old man McCain or Pastor Huckabee - boooooooring! We all KNOW that America wants action: they'll vote for the lesbian or the black man instead! (One or the other, yes - because Hillary will most likely prefer John Edwards as running mate - he's the type of guy lesbians like! LOL And as vice-prez, Edwards will have more time to devote to his ailing wife - maybe.)
So, yeah; the lezzie or the negro (no racial or sexist slur here) They get H.L.A. and rumors of H.L.A. with the first - and potentially a reprise of both JFK AND MLK with the second! That is ACTION for you... :!

I could go on and on with many more examples of the pathetic among us - the Writers Guild and their strike, the big network executives, the movie moguls and the multi-billion dollar corporations brass... All incompetent in their own special way; all making noise for the most fickle reasons and coming up with the lesser solution (but most cost-efficient, I am sure) always...! One word does sum it all up: PATHETIC!

No, I don't give a hoot that it's just about St.Valentine's Day; I've no love lost for any of those bozos and tons more just like them!
I'd rather send Hillary my love on Dragobete's day, on the 24th - because the funny name from Romania has "bete" in it, and, in French, that's exactly what she and all of those bozos here really are: morons!
Foolish is he who actually knows not how foolish his ways truly are; all the other fools pale in comparison because the rest of us, at least, do not indulge in excesses before a live audience...!!!

'Nuff ramblin!

2008-02-06T01:18:00.000-08:00

IN THE NEWS

Super Showdown

Voters in 24 states flock to polls

» U.S. Election '08

Fat Tuesday

New Orleans partiers usher in Mardi Gras

» More World News

Juno Nominees

Celine Dion leads pack with six nods

» More Entertainment News

Hmm...
Let's see now...
After a SUPER SUNDAY
where 97.5 million viewers
(the largest NFL audience ever)
saw a gigantic and sickening upset
take place right before their eyes...
After a MANIC MONDAY
(aren't they all...)
in which so many broken-hearted
patriotic fans had to go back to work...
After a SUPER TUESDAY
that resolved nothing at all
(except that at least 22 voters
will never vote again - and they may
have died in those tornadoes that hit
Arkansas, Tennessee and Kentucky
for truly no good reason at all - much
less any patriotic fervor of any kind
that served any purpose whatsoever.)

Well... what will it be now?
WOEFUL WEDNESDAY?
TERRIBLE THURSDAY?
FEARFUL FRIDAY?!?
SALACIOUS SATURDAY?!?

Let's not keep this up for all of February now
ok?

At least, in New Orleans
and Rio de Janeiro, both
(not to mention other spots
on this sorry globe of ours)
they know better
and they say "bah"
to everything that is not tied to
THE CARNIVAL!
;)

That qualitative given to Saturday
may yet apply after all!

L.P. stands for "Labor Pains" this time...

2008-01-19T17:38:00.000-08:00

Accoucher sans médecin
à l'Hôpital du Sacré-Coeur
(incapable de subvenir à vos besoins
malgré une longue et onéreuse
campagne de financement
parrainée par Guy Mongrain!?)
(18/01/08)

I guess that obstetricians
(and other doctors that actually bring
patients either back to life or
outright 'into this world')
well, their kind is probably not
at its place in that hospital!
Obstetrics are obsolete tricks
when you're really in the business
of finishing off the elderly!
Oops - did I just think that
out loud - in writ?
*LOL*
Such are to be 'ramblings in writ' -
right?

Granted, the HSC
(or SHH - Sacred Heart Hospital?
But the name is really
Hôpital du Sacré-Coeur - yes!)
has not affixed any of that
renovation money
that they campaigned for
(yes - the PUBLIC GAVE...)
towards the obstetrics department
Rather, that money went
towards the renovation of
the archaic, near-obsolete
E.R. there!
Yeah - you get into a silly
accident, or a stupid fight,
you are DYING,
or expected to,
YOU ARE WELCOME!
But if you're in LABOR -
and not wanting to die -
you better go elsewhere!
I am not saying this;
the obstetricians
THEMSELVES
are saying it!
They made this ultimatum
to the HSC administration -
either renovated
(heck - an entire overhaul
is required there)
the "baby section"
or just quit accepting
women in labor -
reroute them towards
private clinics
where they have SPACE,
modern equipment
and no contamination risks.
Because, at the HSC,
such patients
both babies and mothers
have their lives at risk there!

For once,
privatization makes sense!

That hospital has allegedly
not changed its obstetrics department
in fifty years...!

I guess I was lucky then...
Because... I WAS BORN THERE!
Yay.

All I can say is that
I could not stand that
financing campaign
and the smile of said campaign's
spokesman, Guy Mongrain,
a morning man on TV
and now, on radio.
I confess to have taken
a whole batch of leaflets
with his smile on them
and a "nice (fake) nurse"
on the cover of it
BEGGING to "invest
in the future of our own
healthcare"
and to GIVE
to a campaign that
admitted callously
to an objective
of many MILLIONS...
out of OUR pockets!
And, I confess,
I took a batch of those
leaflets/pamphlets
and threw them all
in the recycling can
IN THE VERY CORRIDORS
OF THAT HOSPITAL!

I was walking away
for the night
from Dad's DEATH BED
in the intensive care unit
on that day
two years ago
almost...

+++

Ramblin Man

2008-01-17T15:26:00.000-08:00

Ah - Yeah! They don't make them hit tunes like the lowbrow Alabama band dudes made them - not anymore, eh?

Heck, even more upbeat stuff isn't HALF as good as it used to be (IMHO) - no!

Songs like this one, by The Outfield, have no equal TODAY:

The Outfield: 'Since You've Been Gone'

This is the REAL "Since You've Been Gone" - nothing to do with the crap that American False Idol chick sings over and over again (since it is her only true hit, practically!)

Man - where have all the GENUINE ONES gone to?
Joey Ramone - DEAD.
Jerry Garcia - DEAD.
Bradley Delp, lead singer of BOSTON - he's gone too.

No wonder we're in such a mudpit, music-wise
AND OTHERWISE!

Listening to Boston's hit song "Amanda" brings me to such nostalgic territory nowadays - I could cry!

Tom Scholz is still with us, at least - (well, good for us, so-so for him?)
but judging from past experiments (new or replacement lead singers for Van Halen, INXS and Genesis) substituting anybody for Bradley Delp, even someone supremely talented, will not work out.
No, folks...
Lightning cannot strike twice in the same place.
(Even though some guy apparently did get struck twice - but he was the exception that reaffirmed the rule!)
Lightning cannot be replicated - THAT is for sure!

Boston - the town as the band - has lost a big one. An irreplaceable one.

All the true greats are gone - they've either crashed and burned like Buddy Holly (some did so without ever flying either) or they left painfully, after a long pilgrimage rife with torment - the great Johnny Cash comes to mind.
Roy Orbison also comes to mind.
The troubled Del Shannon also...
Ritchie Valens - gotta mention him, since I mentioned Buddy...!
And The Big Bopper!
I could go on AD INFINITUM...!

Their likes are NOT going to resurface again - EVER.

Certainly not under the keen, sharp eye for talent that Simon Cowell allegedly has - not!

But that is another story...

Zzzzzzz... ZAP! Zaadz? WazZzup...?

2008-01-15T18:59:00.000-08:00

Admittedly, Peter Ragnar (pictured above) is a little bit of both:
guru, first and foremost, and doctor, sort-of...

Mr. Ragnar advertises on ZAADZ - a luminescent community to be found right here, on the wondrous world wide web, where luminescence is -at long last- commonplace and obscurantism, ah, ostracized?

Well, no negative vibes now - there is no ostracism there, ever!
Only, from the get-go, Zaadz makes firmly clear that no darkness is to be allowed or tolerated within that illuminated community.
And that is, in itself, a breath of fresh air.
For there are PLENTY of sites where CONFRONTATION is the chief aim and very raison d'être of the websites... At Zaadz, it is the complete opposite. :)

Of course, I have my own chunk of Zaadz to dock in - here.
Whenever setting sail is too tumultuous - going there is an excellent option for solace, replenishment, nurturing of the soul and plain relaxation.

Oopsy doopsy, though - for it seems like I took too long to both join Zaadz as blog about it: it has changed its name! And it is effective TODAY!
What timing, still, wouldn't you agree? ;)

Zaadz has thus become, quite simply, "Gaia.com".
I guess it is true that simplicity is always best, yes.
Zaadz, as a name, evoked that classic Sean Connery film, Zardoz!
Gaia evokes only - well, the Earth!
It is good to refocus things properly like this - aye!

I'm not going into any "hummmmmmmmm" over this now though...!

Nor am I retitling this entry "Gee... GOSH! Gaia? Golly!" or anything of the sort!
How dare gainsaying Gaia deny me the right to zap Zaadz here...? *lol*
Never mind...!!!

'Nuff ramblin'

Let's Get Ready To Rummmmmble - Sports Rambles!

2008-01-13T11:14:00.000-08:00

I couldn't believe my ears, the other day, when a panel of so-called "experts" (guess who they are: an illiterate former NHL coach, a former player from the same franchise and some other guy...!) chose to blast Toronto forward Jason Blake for running his mouth at Philadelphia goon Steve Downie during an NHL contest recently (it is the only chance NHLers get to exchange pleasanteries, right? Along the boards and crashing into the net!)

And so, the three stooges were WITH STEVIE DOWNIE, imagine that, approving of the insidious punch (a love tap, really) he delivered to Blake while the two were all wrapped up (not nearly well enough though) by two referees ATTEMPTING to break up the melee. And the REASONS why the three stooges were siding with rough guy Downie were utterly ridiculous as probably repulsive too: it appears that Jason Blake has a rep for being a player who likes to "run his mouth". Yeah - so? Léo Labine and Ken Linseman did this WONDERFULLY well for the Boston Bruins in two different eras - it is an ungrateful job, but somebody's got to do it! IT IS PART OF THE GAME! And preferable, to me, than endless fist fights or, especially, cowardly hits from behind that injure players unnecessarily... So, Jason Blake says things that makes blood boil and temperaments lose their focus. GOOD. But that is not the story here, really - EVERYBODY has a RIGHT to express his opinion in the Western world (or so they say!) and all Blake was doing was displaying GUTS by expressing it IN THE GUY'S FACE! And his opinion was that Downie should have been suspended FOR THE ENTIRE YEAR and not merely 20 games as he was, for his disgusting hit (from behind?) on Senators player Dean McAmmond. A hit that was deemed as "deliberate and dangerous" and was aimed at the head, on top of that. Truly a disgracious gesture that wound up only costing Downie $63,101 during his suspension, money that goes to the Players' Emergency Assistance Fund... Hmm, an emergency such as when a player becomes handicapped, overnight, after a vicious hit like that? Should be, eh? One can hope so.

Thus, Jason Blake has an opinion and is not afraid to share it. Jason Blake, the one who also has chronic myelogenous leukaemia, a treatable and rare form of the disease, and undergoes treatment while he continues playing... And THOSE THREE STOOGES ARE OKAY WITH A GOON HITTING HIM IN THE MOUTH SO AS TO TELL HIM TO SHUT UP? Maybe they'd like to get some of that treatment, as well? Maybe, by the same logic, Roger Clemens should add insult to injury and try and apply the ol' baseball bat to the skulls of everyone in baseball who's criticized him since revelations were made about him that explain his longevity... (I'd like to see him try that on Curt Schilling - just because I'm confident Schill is the one who'd come out on top, in this confrontation! Won't hold my breath for this to happen - obviously! I don't believe in 'steroid rage' anyway - only in "steroid degenerative after-effects", yes! But I am digressing...)

Back to the three stooges' comments now... This sort of "expert commentary" is why the NHL remains the neanderthal of the sports world! "Don't like what someone says - punch him into silence!" Anything goes, on the ice! It's not the Ice Capades but the Savagecapades! That sort of mentality led to a kid's proud dad to go and beat up the coach who wasn't using his kid enough, in his humble opinion! It seems like North Americans (Canadians, mostly) de-evolve once they lace up a pair of skates - no matter how odd that sounds, the facts are there! A regular, civilized discussion cannot take place on ice - if anything unpleasant is said, punches will be thrown! It doesn't matter if the target's got cancer or not - you don't like what he says and you're a goon, hip, young and able? PUNCH HIM! That'll settle the argument! It doesn't matter if, off the ice, that sort of behaviour would be highly-reprehensible... Loathed and characterized as sickening and more disgusting than your "average ratio of disgusting"... And lead to criminal charges too! Nooooooo - on the ice, especially in an NHL rink, there is ANOTHER SET OF RULES AND CONVENTIONS that supersede all normal ones from "regular society"... "Thou shall not talk about thy brother player's recent suspensions and disgracious acts committed in the heat of competition" appears to be one of the foremost commandments carved in stone by the NHLPA... Fine example there, yay.

Well then - if no one respects cancer patients (the moment it's a "highly-treatable" form of the c-word, it's pretty much open season on the guy who has it...) why hasn't anyone roughed up Saku Koivu yet? Seems to me like he's had a number of beatings coming on to him... Oh, right - it's simply because HE HAS NO OPINION. He's simply a spineless Fin (just like Don Cherry likes them!) who will administer roughness along the boards, FROM BEHIND - but will cowardly elude any direct confrontation otherwise! Not all cancer sufferers are equal, folks - nope!
But that is another story...

In other "newsies"...
(read: "niaiseries" - as some Frenchies out there certainly can...!)

- They punished severely and reprimanded harshly the lady broadcaster (well, she may be no lady and just a HO...?) who said something that had not its place in sports broadcasting... Something, hell and damnation, about our saintly Blessed Tiger Woods...! Heaven forbid THAT would go unpunished: he is after all only an extremely gifted athlete who is exploiting the system and raking in the millions without breaking much of a sweat because he chose to play with whire men who can't jump, dribble, tackle or get down and dirty in any way, shape or form... Woods could have chosen a sport worthy of his genes - but why bother with that? Playing golf is much more relaxing, dominating it as the novelty that stands out from the pack (which is comprised of older, slower, lazier white guys - read back a little; I am not repaeting the insults!) and cashing supplementary revenue in the form of 1001 profitable endorsements is THE WAY TO GO... Why bother with a short-lived career that only makes you enemies in the end, like Terrell Owens' or O.J. Simpson's careers? Tiger's got it all figured out - plus, he chose himself the bride to suit all of his aspirations, perfecting Sammy Davis Jr's pionnering example in the process! Truly, in the light of all these facts, any ho who DARES shoot her mouth at Lord Woods had better be flailed, tarred and feathered ON THE SPOT...!

- Nerds and other envious losers keep expecting to see the Perfect Patriots falter... They were 16-0 in the regular season, established a NUMBER of records in the process, both teamwise and individually, and were nearly flawless again in their first playoff game against the Jaguars on Saturday... AND STILL - there are those who will be running their mouths about a possible "impossible mission" to even reach the Super Bowl; for the next game will be against either the arch-rival Colts or the Chargers. If against the Colts, the daunting task of beating them twice in the same season appears to be "impossible" to the so-called experts - especially since the Pats could not do it, for the first time EVER, in last year's playoffs... And if against the Chargers, the Patriots would then be facing the team that bested the Colts twice in a row indeed - impossible to defeat the team that ACCOMPLISHED the "impossible" - right? That's logical... NOT! NOTHING is impossible - ANY team can beat ANY opponent at ANY time! Which is why the 17-0 cumulative record the Perfect Patriots put together is so awesome, in this day and age where PARITY is prevalent in ALL of sports... And that is also why EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE for these Patriots to accomplish - EVERYTHING.

- A little comparative note, to end with...
Slick Ric and Sloppy Celtics.
Both could win a 17th championship this year. But Ric Flair is truly at the twilight of his career - and, anyway, we're talking about "Sports Entertainment" there. We're talking about a pre-determined drama, scripted, acted out... Athleticism is involved, sure - and Flair is the best cardio-vascular athlete of all, considering he is 57 or 58 already and has enough in the tank to last through every match he is in, competing against mastodonts half his age...! But "sports entertainment" is a controlled environment - where the "happy ending" can assuredly happen. In the NBA, the Boston Celtics are not the masters of their own destiny. Instead, the basketball is. If it decided to roll off the rim and fall outside the basket, they don't win! Simple as that, Tim! ;)
(Could be a nod to Horton - or to another Tim entirely! Don't ask!)
The Celtics were deemed "sloppy" for dropping a second game out of their last three (while the Patriots remained perfect - and even the Bruins won in dramatic fashion, in accursed Philadelphia, aka goontown!) on Saturday night...
It could happen that Ray, Kevin and Paul get tired of the "quest" already - ANYTHING can happen, you know...! Unlikely, since they are consummate pros and they CRAVE a championship. But, man, losing to the Bobcats and then TWICE to the Wizards by allowing late rallies each time...?!? At least they handed the hated Nets another loss in-between that, but still...
Refocusing on the ultimate goal and avoiding to look past ANY opponent should do it for the Celtics - and, hopefully by the end of 2008, the Boston Celtics will have won another championship, their 17th in 19 or 20 appearances in the Big Dance (in this case, the NBA Finals - tis the best percentage of all pro franchises that have been seen in the final championship rounds often...!)
AND Nature Boy Ric Flair will have retired, AFTER winning his 17th World Title too; something he could have done anytime he wanted to, years ago, in WCW...
But that is another story too - for, now, the self-proclaimed "dirtiest player in the game" is a part of the wretched WWE, where different rules prevail...

'Nuff rambled...!

New Year's Ramblings & Rumblings...

2008-01-03T20:12:00.000-08:00

Yay - Happy New Year... Ha!
With the new year, comes a whole lot of
eye-widening things, I say...

Like me here -
I widen some people's eyes
simply by telling them the truth
that they don't want to either hear
or read about (anywhere - not just
on the old blogs...!)
and still I dispense it
TO THEIR FACES
with a sarcastic smile!
:)

As a result, though,
oddly enough
I wound up feeling like
one of my "anti-role-models"
aye - the Godfather!
Read the following
with that characteristic
hush voice of his
(as he was portrayed by
Marlon Brando...!) -
anybody can impersonate that!
Just pretend you've a cold...

"Ahhhh... Everybody is after me...
The FBI is investigating me...
The IRS keeps hounding me...
The CIA is tickling me, too...
The Gambinis want me dead...
The Sopranos are stealing from me...
The Vitriolis want my blood...
The Medusas want my head...!
The BBC is pissing me off...
The FCC won't let me BE...!
Even the SPCA is after me,
for that cat thing...!
Ohhhhh...
It isn't easy being a Corleone!"

Yeah - it sure isn't, eh!
Of course, substitute the name
Corleone with Pimentel
and operate further substitutions
all throughout that funny bit
and you will get a more accurate
list of my very own adversaries...!
Mamma Mia - Que Inferno É Este!
À Bon Entendeur - Salut!
;)

So, I try to relax
getting off the net
and onto the couch
watching some cable TV... right?
That's going to work out!
RIGHT...
I wind up, invariably,
zapping through channels
as I see, once again,
the veracity of the Boss' words
("57 Channels And Nothing On")
and everywhere I go, almost,
I see and hear something
that makes me cringe
and feel like BLOGGING ABOUT!
Not just anywhere either
but HERE in particular,
on "Ramblings In Writ"
where I am at my most acerbic
EVER - AND ALWAYS!

Let's see, where should I start...

Maybe on the Trekkies' case?
One inane trekkie, a girl,
that I saw on some documentary
mockumentary (alas, not the case
but it would have been better
had it been that!)
hosted and narrated by
Denise Crosby...
Anyway...
That silly trekkie girl
made a prediction for the future:
"we're going to all move to another
planet, in another galaxy...
Start anew there..."
RIGHT...
Typical capitalistic mindset there!
Consume - THE WHOLE EARTH,
THIS TIME, NOTHING LESS -
and throw it away afterwards
when we've sucked it dry
of all its natural resources
and polluted it beyond repair,
killing in the process all
of the wildlife there...
LET'S JUST PACK UP AND LEAVE IT THEN!
YEAH!
That inane trekkie could not have summed up
any better why I loathe "Captain Kirk"
and always prefered both
"Commander Koenig"
and "Luke Skywalker"
over his vainglorious, cocky hide!

But, speaking of
(and against) capitalism...
The more I think about it
and the more I observe
our wasteful ways
that lead to tons of food
being dumped in the garbage
EVERY SINGLE DAY...
I am forced to think
that, perhaps, rationing
has its merits
and intrinsic LOGIC too...
Because it makes NO SENSE
AT ALL that, in
North America
we get unlimited access
to goods and services
and WASTE THEM
both shamelessly
and ceaselessly
while there are others
on this planet
who are dying
from malnutrition...
The fragile economical
system that we have
is based upon
supply and demand
of course -
and to make sure
the demand is always
satiated, the supply
is always ample;
lest a war of the prices
begins, and it drives
them DOWN...
Something that is NOT
good for business
but so good for the
consumer!
But it is that same darn
consumer who,
once he has all he wants,
is being so wasteful!
CUT HIS RATION -
then, maybe, he'll wise up!
MAYBE...

Communist Russia, for instance,
never had clogged up toilets!
Those problems could not BE -
not when a roll of toilet paper
was all they'd be allowed to have
for an entire week or something...
Gotta make it LAST
in these situations... EH?

But I've digressed enough...

Let's see now...
WHAT ELSE
did I see on cable TV
LAST NIGHT
that made me go
"ewwww"

AH YES...
The sharp rise of a barrel of crude oil
from 15$ to 100$
within A FEW YEARS really...
And no one is quite sure
HOW THAT HAPPENED...?!?
Sheesh...
Not even economy whiz
SUZE ORMAN
(I always thought it was
Suze as in "Zeus"
but with an S...!
But nooooo -
Larry King,
her host, kept saying
Suzie...!
Oh well...)
Suze revealed, while she
patronized everyone
on how to cut costs
and manage their own finances,
that she wanted either Obama
or Hilary to win THE BIG ONE
and she revealed why too...
She wants to be able to leave
"all the money she's made"
(and she isn't shy to say that
she's made a lot - the former
waitress gone genius...!)
to her SAME-SEX
LIFE PARTNER...!
Wow - I usually have a radar
(a "gay-dar", right?)
that is pretty acute
for these sort of things
but THIS really came out (!)
of left field for me...!
Perhaps because I only
thought of Suze as a boring
woman too preoccupied
with MONEY MATTERS...
Seeing her on Larry King Live
only meant, for me,
more boring "loan talk"
or "refinancing talk"
or "debt management talk"
or "credit improvement talk"
etc... so on and so forth...
with the occasional political
commentary thrown in,
for good measure...
And that, too, is boring...
Hence, when it came,
I never thought such a
revelation would come with it!
I believe her mate is named
Kathie...
Suzie & Kathie...
How sweet...
And Suze displayed her
outright envy and jealousy
of Larry's ability to just
CROAK AND LEAVE IT ALL
TO THE WIFE...
While she can't leave a penny
to Kathie - without the
damnable State Tax
taking a cut!
And since she's made
"A LOT OF MONEY"
she wants to be safe from that
- after all, Kathie made money too
and it could be Kathie who
croaks first, not Suzie!
:!

Okaaaaaaaaaay...

Let's, ah, MOVE ON...

Next, I caught a repeat
of MTV's very own X-treme wrestling -
the show that puts the McMahon revival
of the lame ECW brand to SHAME!
(Or to Shane?
Wasn't his silver spooned
pukester of a sonny-boy,
Shane, the "owner" of ECW
at some point in time?
Or was it WCW...
Does anybody care, really?
WWE swallowed up
its two long-time rivals
WCW and ECW
and it was all for
NOTHING!
For, in their place,
stand now two
improved competitors
apt and ready to cater
to the lowest common
denominator!
TNA and MTV's show
(Wrestling Society X)
ARE BETTER
than the old WCW
and the current WWE
and ECW crap!
And that is pure, golden
MAGNIFICENT
IRONY!
Whoooooooooo!
But never mind that
right now...)

McMahon is a BILLIONNAIRE,
is he?
Hmm...
I wonder how he can be, sometimes...
With so many bad moves
(XFL, that bodybuilding federation, XFL,
buying out the competition,
XFL... Letting go talent that,
immediately, strengthened the new
competition...
Oh, and did I mention the XFL?)
he must have lost twice as much
as he's made at a zillion rednecks'
expense...
All those steroid scandals
and tragic deaths
sure didn't help either...
But enough about Vinnie Mac...!

I criticize him enough times
to count him among my aforementioned
adversaries - potentially, at least!

I expected NEW adversaries this year
-far more fanatical ones too-
but, instead, I got their
counterparts...!

Aye, instead of more from the Barrie brood
(a wretched, misbegotten race -
believe you me...!)
I made soft-spoken, articulate
acquaintances
from Boston and Beyond...!

Instead of threats and insults,
I received kudos and accolades!

Wow...

And instead of a radical response
I received the moderate one that follows:

Muslims Against Sharia has left a new comment on your post
"This Holiday Season - Reflect On These Things:":

"Most of the Western Muslim establishment is comprised of Islamist groups claiming to be moderates. True moderate Muslims reject Islamic supremacy and Sharia; embrace religious equality and democracy."

"What is a moderate Muslim? According to a dictionary, a moderate is a person who is opposed to radical or extreme views or measures, especially in politics or religion.
Yet, majority of the public seem to be struggling with the definition of a moderate Muslim. Perhaps we can make this task easier by defining a radical Muslim and then defining the moderate as an opposite of the radical."

"Muslims Against Sharia compiled a list of issues that differentiate
moderate Muslims from Islamic radicals.
Hopefully you can help us grow this list."
http://muslimsagainstsharia.blogspot.com/ 2008/01/what-is-moderate-muslim.html

"Poll: Who is a moderate Muslim?"
http://muslimsagainstsharia.blogspot.com/ 2008/01/poll-who-is-moderate-muslim.html

Aye - that was deposited onto my comments section
(that's the way I always refer to it!)
on TLB PRIME...
Further proving that "the luminous blog"
deserves to be called "TLB PRIME"
and not only because it came first
but truly because it is viewed the most
by every imagineable sort of people too!
Such a wide audience, worldwide,
(as evidenced by that ClusterMap of mine)
that has one thing in common:
CLASS!
The only other blog/site of mine
that comes close, with the quality
of its audience (and content, of course!)
and wide-appeal factor,
is the lugubrious blog!
Not sure what that says, though...
That I truly am an L.P. -
a Living Paradox?
:!
One who is in the Light,
basking in it one day,
and in the depths of despair
besieged by morbid thoughts
on the very next day...?!?
:!

Anyhow...

I've actually RAMBLED ON FOR TOO LONG...
AGAIN!
Missed out that comparatitive "study"
("luminous study", I should say!)
that I wanted to make on the subject of
LATE NIGHT TELEVISION...!
Aye - the damn talk-shows!
Leno, Conan and Kimmel -
all without writers!
Which one was the lamest?
I'll have to wait to find out...
Letterman - he's got his scribes back!
(Hmm - that sounds odd!)
My bet is...
inviting Hilary, on the day after
her defeat (Obama won -
Suze cried, I'm sure...)
took away Dave's advantage,
right there!

And as for the lamest...
My bet is that it will be decided
between Kimmel and Conan O'Brien
as well as Huckabee and some other
Republican candidate...!
*lol*

And so the winter saga begins...

2007-12-22T16:44:00.000-08:00

...
'Tis the 22nd of December
and TODAY is the official
BEGINNING OF WINTER!

Tell that to those who have gone through
TWO huge snowstorms -
including the BLIZZARD last week!

I find it ironic, too, of course,
on a very personal level,
that WINTER begins on the 22nd
exactly the date of the month
that I associate with DEATH now...
(for those of you who haven't
either paid attention to
-or simply READ- me,
the 22nd is the day
back in March of 2006
where I saw a dear one die
before my very eyes...
Ever since, evidently,
each 22nd of the month
merely adds a number
to the totals of my
bereavement period...
But, as Dolores O'Riordan sang,
DOES ANYONE CARE?

Don't answer that -
not in the comments section
not through any means -
lest you want to see me
go MEDIEVAL
on your "heinie"...!

...

When the hell is the whole damn island of Montreal caving in - HUH?!? Sheesh...

2007-08-24T23:02:00.000-07:00

Yet more striking evidence that populating ("peupler" or "povoando" seems like better words to use here right now, oddly enough...) that area was a very BAD IDEA...

After seeing frightening evidence that the rigorous (and, these days, unpredictable) weather will age the major structures there way faster than any damn engineer can ever imagine; after seeing (and most shamefully failing to predict and prevent) an overpass (from) collapsing under its own weight, killing mere commuters; after noting the intolerable againg and decaying of bridges, other overpasses, aqueducts, subterranean passages (including the famed city beneath the city, at the subway level, in downtown Montreal...) not to mention many old buildings (old factories included) that deface that so-called metropolitan area by their mere state of decomposition...
NOW the mayor of Montreal says that "all preventive measures will be taken to assure that the safety of our citizens is enforced (...) blah-blah-blah" (I paraphrase - of course!)

The most important line of metro - the green one, between key stations Berri and Lionel-Groulx, I do believe - was completely condemned on Friday the 24th of August (which could have easily been a 13th for all the boutiques affected by this...! Since that stretch of the subway line includes the elite stations Peel, McGill and even "la câline de PLACE DES ARTS"!!! Imagine how much these depend on the subway to bring them ALL of their regular customers! And now - NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO COME; the big glitzy THE BAY store was even quarantined...!)

And why all this chaos?

Because a very scary rift, two centimeters wide if I remember correctly, was spotted on a huge cement block that is the very FOUNDATION of the huge structure there (supporting all the stores above it; and roofing the metro below!) - and the location of this was right underneath that The Bay store!
(Okay - that is nothing next to the 1 billion light years wide "hole in the universe" that astronomers have just "discovered" or "stumbled across" - but that is also another completely different story right there too...!!! No one is immediately endangered by this hole either...)

It was heartwarming to hear the mayor of Montreal voice his concern for all in this situation - he mentioned virtually everyone, from those daring commuters who DARE drive their car downtown, contributing to congestion/traffic jams, noise, the annoyance of it all AND pollution of course... to pedestrians, who merely walk on by, from their overpriced condo to the bar at the corner and back... from shopkeepers to other workers in the street block implicated in this potential MASSIVE CAVE-IN (and, if it occurred, what a huge hole it would make right at the center of this supposed "big town" too... Yikes!)
Yes, the mayor mentioned them all - every category of peeps one can think of, on the spot, BUT ONE; THE SUBWAY USER!
Why the omission?
I wonder - is it because public transit system users are like unto "the people beneath the stairs" - or "the subhumans from underground"...?!?
They're half-zombies already - they can be buried and left there, it doesn't matter really... IS THAT THE DEAL HERE?
Metro commuters are a lesser sub-species of commuters... expendable and easy to forget? IS THAT IT, HUH?!?

I kid you not - Montreal's mayor simply snubbed all of his precious metro system's clientele by mentioning by name pedestrians, car drivers, business owners and the like - but not caring enough to say the precise magic words "METRO USERS"...

And that is simply an aberration.

The same day, Quebec City's mayor died very suddenly.
A dynamic lady, full of life and energy, and yet she suddenly felt her heart aching - and one heart attack later, she was gone. She may have been substantially older than Montreal's mayor (she was 70) and also quite moreso controversial than he is; but SHE would have NEVER made such a faux pas!
No no no!

And the mere fact that she died and he lives on proves it to me:
something is amiss here!
ALL the good ones are dying, falling by the wayside - and only the CRAP REMAINS!
IN POWER.
That is very bad news for the rest of us!

But the light at the end of the tunnel is this:
if we're any good too, we're going to croak soon as well.
And then the crap left behind will not matter anymore! ;)

rambling at random - part deux

2007-08-10T11:22:00.000-07:00

Lavale, Maryland

There is a "Lavale" in Maryland...!

That's still better than LAVALETTE, West Virginia
MUCH better than LAVALETTE, New Jersey
AND MUCH, MUCH BETTER than Laval, Québec, CANADA!!!

You can sense already, by the tone and brusqueness,
that another salvo of anti-quebec rhetoric is coming right up here...!!!

And it sure is!

Denis Lévesque on LCN is nothing but a cheap imitation of Larry King on CNN

Most nights he can only envy the guests King has -
like, say, the time when he had MICHEL LOUVAIN on
same night, on Larry King Live, good ol' Larry had
the voluptuous Jessica Lan on...
Granted, Jessica Lan used to be a MAN
(she is the most stunning result of ALL transgendered specimens ever seen -
and I can only hope that she remains nothing but a MAN
who prefers to look like a WOMAN on the outside -
because she is then THE PERFECT LESBIAN to behold -
from afar, of course! But I digress...)
- even so, Lan is still a better guest to have than Louvain -
who is nothing more than a closeted queer who sings sappy songs since 1957!

And speaking of him; his brief association with Donald Lautrec
and Pierre Lalonde, as "Les 3 L", was nothing but another cheap imitation
made in Quebec - of the Rat Pack this time! Only problems are (and they are many!) as follows: no matter how vain as he tries to be, Lalonde is no Deano - Lautrec was neither as talented as Sammy Davis Jr. nor as funny -
and Sinatra wasn't a fag like Louvain undoubtedly is!
But I am digressing unceremoniously here...

Back to LCN now for a sec...
The big boss at both TVA and LCN is Pierre-Karl Péladeau...
Heck, he owns the whole multimedia empire named Québécor!
Québecor Publishing is the cornerstone of his mediatic empire...
One that he inherited (along with sis) from Daddy-o,
but that is a mere detail at this point in time...
(I could mention that the Péladeau sis is a junkie -
but why bother delve into that mess, eh? Hmm - ok, LET'S!)
It is heartwarming to see how much INTEGRITY is taken to heart by PKP;
he will not prohibit his LCN news machine from showing his sister,
Anne-Marie Péladeau (she who looks more like a dime-storey druggie indeed
than a rich heiress) throughout her many debacles with the LAW -
as she has been arraigned on drug possession charges, drug trafficking even,
and she has been penalized multiple times for RELAPSES...
And the whole sordid saga is faithfully related on LCN news,
continuously, 24/7, repeated every 15 minutes - ad nauseam...
Aye - it is great to have dependable news that we can TRUST -
but it is also great to have a dependable family
that sticks by you and covers your back when you mess up!
I guess money can't buy happiness, love or someone you can really lean on!
Heck - when cash is at stake, they'll choose IT over any blood ties...
Blood is ticker than water - but not than paper, apparently!

But I digress...

I just thought it so ironic that, the other day,
after hearing a caller on LARRY KING LIVE,
who hailed from Lavale, Maryland indeed,
I hear a colleague of Denis Lévesque,
the aforementioned cheap Larry King wannabe of Montreal,
the venerable Claude Poirier
(who would be a Joe Friday wannabe... maybe?!?)
lament about the sad situation in parts of Laval, QC.
while he is a resident of Montreal
and a fan of the Boston Bruins!
(One who likely eats often at Boston Pizza!
Boston Pizza which, for some reasons all their own,
just HAD TO put together a commercial that states
and makes VERY CLEAR to all the dimwits out there,
that their pizza, pasta, buns, beer
and other crap they overpriced on their menu
does NOT come from BOSTON!
Of course, Montreal is always soooooooo jealous of Boston!
Boston has a baseball team of LEGENDARY status
Montreal lost its pathetic team, YEARS AGO!
Boston has the Super Bowl-caliber Patriots
Montreal has meek Alouettes!
Boston had their BIG DIG -
Montreal has decaying highways and overpasses
that threaten to collapse at any given time!
They just injected 30 million bucks
to try and prevent that - but
they really need three times as much cash!
But I digress again...
Boston also has the CELTICS - back in contention
and a LEGEND in their own right!
A franchise with the BEST winning percentage of ALL
multi-championship teams in the WORLD
- better than the Yankees, better than the Canadiens!
Montreal? It has NO basketball team at all!
I need not go on, I think...
Mere market value
attached to the name
gives "BOSTON" the edge
over "Montreal" - every time!
You will NEVER see a "Montreal Pizza"
or a "Montreal Delicacies"
because such a name would be an OXYMORON!
You may see, though, one day,
"Montreal Mushrooms" - maybe!
But that is another story again...)

Back to Louvain now...

Do you know that his mother died of a stroke, in his arms basically?
Only the hospital kept her around for EIGHT YEARS.
YEARS - NOT DAYS...

She had had the stroke during a performance by her son -
and it was her all-time most favorite song EVER too -
sonny was standing by her side, with one arm over her shoulders...
He could feel something wasn't right with mother dearest...
When he finished the song, and the show ended
(it was a TV broadcast of Jacques Boulanger's "Allo BouBou")
he could feel her weakening... and she simply collapsed.
FOR EIGHT LONG YEARS
they kept her around until her heart just stopped beating -
she wasn't in a coma but she was TOTALLY BRAIN DEAD...

And me - I could only get SIX DAYS for MY DAD...?!?

Add to that the tale of that OTHER OLD LADY -
she was 20 years older than Dad
got into a stupid car crash and was left comatose
(what was she doing driving around in the first place?!?)
-she was just as damaged, brain-wise, as Dad was,
but he had been rendered so due to a stroke-
Still, they kept her hooked on a respirator AD INFINITUM...
SHE COULD STILL BE THERE -
FOR ALL I KNOW...!!!
And Dad - only six HARD-FOUGHT DAYS...
Six days I had to argument to GET!

I can't forget this and
I can't forgive this.

Especially not after having heard about
"the man who died"
or rather "the man who was pronounced dead"
and we do mean "brain-dead" again...
And then - MIRACLE...!
He rose back to life!
He wasn't brain-dead after all...
And to unhook HIS respirator
would have thus been... MURDER.

We got neither M-word in the latter case
I say it was really a case of another M-word...
MISDIAGNOSIS!
Misdiagnosis in Montreal!
Where miracles are few
and murders - many...

And I wonder if it wasn't what happened
with my dear, dear,
saintly of a man
Dad.

+++

2007-08-01T05:36:00.000-07:00

Idiocy is prevalent and running rampantly in our society today...
Heck, it runs roughshod over LOGIC...!
Take the case of that gas station employee;
she was attacked one night, at gun point
somebody was after the gas station's money really
not after her... But she could have been shot dead
as so many others have before her...
After this ordeal, she actually helped police
nab the culprit and recuperate the loot!
Wow - model employee, right?
She got "employee of the month" honors
and a raise with that - RIGHT?
WRONG!
She was rewarded shortly thereafter with
the exact opposite of what she deserved:
SHE WAS FIRED
FOR HAVING 16$ EXTRA IN HER
CASH REGISTER!!!
I guess her boss doesn't like money...

Another absurd bit coming right up:
THE GOVERNMENT...
Mom is retired...
She gets something from the Federal
in accordance to what she gets from
the other echelons - right.
All is okay so far...
BUT
Once the Fed sees that she's getting
what they deem as "enough"
from the other parties,
they pick their spot fine
to axe a sizeable chunk of what
mother dearest gets...
And so, she got livid
and dispatched ME... :!
(Those are the times when
we can truly say "why me?"
but I digress...)
And so, I waltz into
SOCIAL SERVICES county
and I find the ladies there
to be even more abysmal
more infuriating
more annoying
more prone to ill-wishing
as to piss me off
than any other broad
I've ever complained about
either from the ones
I am related to
or the ones I dated!

I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT -
they are there to HELP US
and yet they really help
THE DAMN GOVERNMENT!
AGAINST us!!!
As if they needed the extra help...
They eat up our taxes...
They overcharge us for "services"
some we don't even make any use of
- all for the greater good
of the "collectivity"!
WHAT A JOKE!
NO ONE CARES ABOUT HIS FELLOW MAN!
"Social justice"
is just bureaucracy now!
And to know
that one's cash is diminished
so that the live-in lovers living in sin
the same-sex odd couples
and the STD-ridden contaminators
CAN THRIVE ON
IN SOCIETY
- well, it turns my stomach!

YOU DON'T CUT IN HALF
THE EARNINGS OF
A WIDOW
JUST TO MAKE SURE
A BUNCH OF SICKOS
GET THEIR
"FAIR SHARE"
AS WELL!

THAT'S MY OPINION -
AND I'M THE LUMINOUS ONE HERE!

Ben Kenobi Is Born (Anew?) - Today!

2007-04-02T11:23:00.000-07:00

Obi-Wan Is One With Jesus Now...?

I think I'm in trouble

2007-04-01T12:08:00.000-07:00

Years go by...

And so little has changed...

I think...
I KNOW - I'm in trouble!
Something has burst my bubble...
I gotta get out of here - on the double!
Or... rumble! ;)
Hell, Yeah!
Let's go with the alternative...!

2007-03-27T16:11:00.000-07:00

It's Tuesday...
The last tuesday of March...
Ever to be a day of ominous significance for me, now...

Last year, the last tuesday of March was a bad day for me.
Very bad.

The end of a chapter.

The optimistic mindset will label that as, rather, the beginning of a new chapter - a new era - a new beginning altogether...

Me, I am neither an optimist nor a pessimist
I am a realist

And the last tuesday of March was a bad, sad day.
Period.

More to come, though...

Ice There, Ice Everywhere - Except Here!

2007-02-03T19:00:00.000-08:00

Then can you tell me why in blue blazes are those morons spraying SAFE-T-SALT all over the damn streets?!?
THERE IS NO ICE! IT IS NOT SLIPPERY!
Spraying the damn safe-T-salt on SNOW is the dumbest thing they could do!!!
The snow will melt - and then there will be salt on the asphalt - it's there just to ruin your footwear, is it?!? Sheesh...
I actually slipped on the salt once - but never on melting snow or snow per say!
Some help the damn SAFE-T-SALT was there, eh?
And I would suggest a class-action suit against Sifto or Winsor for all the damages they cause us all - I mean, how many shoes and boots go to waste because of them, eh?!? But I care not to make a 20$ profit after all the millions and millions of fellow "victims" get their cut - and then the lion's share will go to the lucky lawyers who get to handle the case! Grrrrrr...

The only spots that REALLY NEEDED the SAFE-T-SALT lately were:
- The Russian ICE FLOES where many were stranded recently (hey - the damn ice is melting anyway and "breaking away" from the coast...!)
- The Courier competition on ICE in icy Montreal
- Iceland, I guess...
Oh, yeah - one more...
Icy hypocrisy - rampant in many circles - pour salt on them I say! Salt and anything else that is within your grasp...!
It'll change their tune! ;)

commercial review - wow, another first for luminous me! ;)

2007-01-10T10:10:00.000-08:00

Gotta love that publicity mindwipe process sometimes...
If you are nowhere near "la belle province", you have not seen this commercial - the one where gambling is denounced as a problem through the use of poker cards! Wow - what genius thought of that one...
The true genial aspect of it, is that family is also denounced in the very same way, as being, like... of no help at all? Duh!
Here is how it goes:
We open with a shot of two hands at a poker table, handling a deck of playing cards and about to lay them on the table, one by one for the purposes of this commercial and not so much to deal a hand now...! *Whew*
This same shot will last the whole commercial through - only the cards will change, of course... And names... And trends with that?
First, there's the joker - that's representative of the gambler dude when he's got his "game face on". Because, when he is his "normal self" - in typical Jekyll & Hyde fashion, he is an Ace of Hearts! (Rrrrrrright...)
Then his entourage - mom (the queen), grandpa (the king), friends (I'd say "des deux de pique" but they went with three's from three houses...) and, last and definitely least, the godfather (a Jack - forget what house he comes from - I say it's just another jacka$$! Aren't they all... Your folks pick them for you and we just KNOW that we would have picked somebody else entirely! Godfather, fairy godmothers and the bogeyman - they all belong in the same place, if you ask me - and that's the pits! But I digress once again...)
The gambling problem is, of course, not resolved with these sort of "helpers" - those who are no help at all indeed - and the problem is even getting worse... And so, the commercial ends with another Jack to the rescue - the Jack of Diamonds or a Jack of Hearts as it may be, but I say it is just another jacka$$ too! This one is the anonymous line's "support" person, available for a few hours a day only though (it would be 24 hours a day if they were selling useless crap for five easy payments of 24.99$ on your credit card... TO HELP, to make a difference and to actually, just maybe, save a soul, help can only be made available for a limited time each day - usually at a time of day when the truly "major crises" do not occur, ever... Makes tons of sense.)
End of commercial.
End of problem?
Not so sure about that...

On this date...

2006-09-28T12:17:00.000-07:00

September 28th, 1542 - Portuguese explorer Juan Rodriguez Cabrillo arrived at what is now San Diego. He was the first European to see California.

Ha.

Why couldn't he have been THE LAST ONE too!?
That difference alone would have cut back a good 33% of all that degrading, detestable "californication" they have going on down there, which has only been getting worse and worse since the damn Spaniards followed suit and went down there too...!

And don't just blame it on the heat either!
We all know that the BEST way to beat the heat is to take a COLD SHOWER - not act like dogs and alley cats!!!
*LMBO*

safety & self-defense tips

2006-09-17T01:37:00.000-07:00

Because Luminous Luciano cares! Sure I do! Rrrrrright.
As much as Rrrrrrrrrrrutten does.
Rutten who?
Bas Rutten, that's who, bouncer extraordinaire!
To tell the truth, Bas Rutten was much more than just a bouncer. He was a mixed martial arts fighter all over the world's kickboxing rings, most notably where that sort of thing is really appreciated, namely in Japan. Bas Rutten was one of the best fighters in MMA spectator -and often, one has to admit, spectacular if brutal- sport. He was a 3-time Pancrase champion and an UFC champion too. Granted, he was a lean mean brawling machine back then - now he's become a beefier brute but still a likeable and often funny and agreeable guy, somehow...! For, here today, Bad a$$ Bas gives us a whole crash course on how to decimate any baddie that comes your way or simply antagonizes you in a bar, on the streets or anywhere in-between - free of any charge!

The thing is, Bas Rutten and I share the same philosophy. As he says in the video, he doesn't believe in an eye for an eye; he believes in two eyes for an eye. In other words, if someone attacks you, you show no mercy whatsoever in taking him out and "doing him damage" - permanent damage. This is inflicting debilitating damage upon your opponent, all in a spirit of self-defensive retaliation/revenge imbued of divinely-decreed self-preservation, of course! Yup - I believe in that! A much greater man taught us to "pray for our enemies" (Jesus said that, for you heathens without a clue) however I believe it applies to those enemies that stay out of our faces and hate us from afar! Those that get too close deserve to get hurt - and get hurt bad! No joke! Well, maybe not... The fact remains that so many decent folks are stuck on wheelchairs for the rest of their lives - if a few lowlives wind up in the same condition, it is not an injustice at all! Maybe the experience will make them better human beings - although, deep down, I doubt it will.

So, my luminous advice is indeed to do as Roustabout Rutten (a better nickname than, say, Rotten Rutten... eh?) admonishes, if only on week-ends and nights out, out onto the dangerous streets out there - for it is a jungle out there and these boogers deserve to be blinded and beaten up bad!

Who needs Stone Cold Steve Austin, Goldberg or Vin Diesel - when one has Bas Rutten for a hero and veritable role-model?
A practical hero, that is...
Over and out! ;)

The First Dream Cast And The First Dream Princess

2006-09-14T14:14:00.000-07:00

There will never be another one like Princess Grace of Monaco...
On this date, she suffered a stroke and drove over a cliff, subsequently dying from the injuries sustained when her car plunged down a 45-foot (13.7-metre) embankment. That was on September 14, 1982.
The spot where she fatally lost control is said to be the same spot where the picnic scene in To Catch a Thief was filmed in 1954.
The inscription at her burial site in Monaco's cathedral does not refer to her as a princess. It uses the title "uxor principis" (prince's wife), which is traditional in the House of Grimaldi.

She is interred at the Cathedral of St. Nicholas, Monte Carlo, Monaco.

Chosen by Empire magazine as one of the 100 Sexiest Stars in film history (#5). [1995]

Ranked #51 in Empire (UK) magazine's "The Top 100 Movie Stars of All Time" list. [October 1997]

Grace Kelly had hoped "to return to acting in Alfred Hitchcock's Marnie (1964), but the people of Monaco didn't want their princess playing a thief and romancing Sean Connery." Instead, she stayed in Monaco - and would, of course, never return to the dream life of films and the glitz and glamour of Hollywood.

September 14th is known for less somber things too:
In 1920, the first live radio dance music was broadcast, carried by a Detroit station and featuring Paul Specht and his orchestra. The idea caught on fast... From Paul Specht to Phil Spector, music would never look back!

Sort of like Grace who, once she set foot into her princess glass slipper and onto Monaco, never looked twice at Tinseltown...

Also of note, on this date - September 14th, 1628, Salem, Massachusetts, was founded.
Mexico City was occupied by the U.S. Army, in 1847...
U.S. President William McKinley died of wounds inflicted by an assassin eight days earlier, in 1901. He was succeeded by his vice-president, Theodore Roosevelt.
The Soviet probe Lunik-2 became the first Earth-launched space vehicle to land on the moon in 1959 while, in 1963 ("wish I could be - back in 1963" - who penned those words that I paraphrase here, quick? Oh... Alan Moore. Carry on as if nothing happened then - cause not much did...!) the first surviving U.S. quintuplets were born in Aberdeen, S.D., to Maryann and Andrew Fischer.
There's your dream cast - the original Party of Five; the Fischers! ;)

See - not all somber events.
But for more somber events on this date, all throughout the year(s?) - check out The Lugubrious Blog!

This date - an all ominous date now - in history...

2006-09-11T13:31:00.000-07:00

September 11th is the 254th day of the year.
Is there any SPECIAL MEANING to that?

Ever since "9/11", everything that has to do with this date THROUGHOUT HISTORY has been over-analyzed and over-emphasized... Because, of course, to have such a BAD DAY of this magnitude (I am listening to Daniel Powter's Bad Day tune as I ramble in writ here...!) in the GOOD OL' MIGHTY USA - it simply HAS TO HAVE A GREATER MEANING IN THE COSMIC GRAND SCHEME OF UNIVERSAL THINGS...!!!

Rrrrrrrrrrrrrright...

THESE (following) ARE THE FACTS THOUGH:

On a September 11th...
in 1297 - Scottish patriot Sir William Wallace defeated the army of Edward I at Stirling Bridge. (He would end badly and pay dearly for this victory...)

in 1709 - Duke of Marlborough (John Churchill) and Prince Eugene of Savoy of Austria defeated French Marshal Villars at the Battle of Malplaquet, France. (They would end badly and pay dearly for this victory...)

in 1777 - General George Washington and his troops are defeated by the British under General William Howe at the Battle of Brandywine, Pennsylvania. (The British would pay dearly for this victory - though they have not ended badly at all - yet)

in 1786 - The Annapolis Convention - in which 12 delegates met to discuss commercial matters of interest between the states - was convened, leading to the Constitutional Convention. (That would end badly too - no? *lol*)

in 1789 - Alexander Hamilton was appointed the first U.S. Secretary of the Treasury. (He died.)

in 1814 - American fleet scored a decisive victory over the British in Battle of Lake Champlain (War of 1812). The American victory, coupled with the end of the British war against Napoleon, led to peace negotiations in Ghent, Belgium. (The Americans would pay dearly for this victory - with Vietnam maybe? And seem bent on ending badly - with what they are doing today...)

in 1841 - President John Tyler's veto of the Banking Bill prompted his cabinet to resign (except Secretary of State Daniel Webster). (Webster would regret this badly - and he as Tyler ended badly too!)

in 1850 - Opera singer Jenny Lind, the "Swedish Nightingale," made her American debut at New York's Castle Garden Theater. (She's dead. Her new audience loves her though...)

in 1897 - A strike by 75,000 coal mine workers ended after 10 weeks. The miners won an 8-hour workday, semimonthly paychecks, and the abolition of company stores.
(The miners would pay dearly for this victory though... and, you've guessed it, end badly. And end up dirty too.)

in 1904 - The battleship Connecticut was launched in New York. (It ended badly.)

in 1916 - First time "Star Spangled Banner" was sung at the beginning of a baseball game (Cooperstown, New York). (How many times has it ended badly - when the likes of Roseanne Barr sung it? How many times did it start an evening that ended oh-so-very-badly for the home team... huh? Well, when it's a New York team, it's oh-so well-deserved though...!)

in 1918 - American troops arrived in Russia to fight the Bolsheviks.
9that ended badly for the Bolsheviks... But the Americans are all dead too, nowadays...)

in 1941 - Charles A. Lindbergh said "the British, the Jewish and the Roosevelt administration" were trying to draw the U.S. into World War II, sparking charges of anti-Semitism. (That ended badly for Lindbergh too...)

in 1954 - Miss America Pageant debuted on TV; Miss California, Lee Ann Meriwether, was crowned the winner. (That ended badly for Miss Meriwether too - with the not-so plum role of Catwoman...!)

in 1959 - The first U.S. food stamps were authorized by Congress.
(That did NOT end hunger in America. Much less elsewhere...)

in 1967 - "The Carol Burnett Show" premiered on TV. (That ended with cancellation - is that bad enough for ya?)

in 2001 - Suicide hijackers crashed two airliners into the World Trade Center in New York, causing the 110-story twin towers to collapse. Another hijacked airliner hit the Pentagon and a fourth crashed in a field in Pennsylvania. The attackers were Islamic terrorists from Saudi Arabia and several other Arab nations. Reportedly financed by Saudi fugitive Osama bin Laden's al Qaeda terrorist organization, they were allegedly acting in retaliation for America's support of Israel, its involvement in the Persian Gulf War, and its continued military presence in the Middle East.
(We all how badly all of that ended... Oh, right - it hasn't ended yet. Dubya & crew seem to want it to end with WORLD WAR 3 - and nothing else!)

THE FOLLOWING POOR SOULS WERE BORN INTO THIS SADDER WORLD ON A SEPTEMBER 11TH...
(those that are born on this date henceforth will TRULY be sad for it!)

1862 - O. Henry (William Sydney Porter), American short story writer. (when they make chocolate bars bearing your name, you know you've made it!)
1885 - D.H. Lawrence, English novelist and editor. (not the originator of the D.H. in the American League of Baseball though - sorry to deprive you of your illusions about THAT...!)
1917 - Ferdinand Marcos, Philippines president (1965-1986). (when an obscure French-Canadian singer-songwriter makes a song about you -"Ferdinando Marcos... a une villa sous la mer" Huh? What?- you know the end is near...)
1924 - Tom Landry, coach of the Dallas Cowboys football team. (not even the team's famed cheerleaders will cheer this one... It's jeers only for Tom these days!)
1940 - Brian DePalma, American movie director. (The one with a Hitchcock complex)

ASIDE FROM THE MANY DEATHS OF "9/11" (AND COUNTLESS ANONYMOUS ONES WHO HAVE PERISHED ON THIS DATE THROUGHOUT THE HISTORY OF MANKIND) THESE ILLUSTRIOUS NAMES HAVE DIED ON THIS DATE AS WELL:

1971 - Nikita Khrushchev, former Soviet Union leader. (Not the basis for an Elton John song...)
1973 - Chilean President Salvador Allende, in a violent military coup. (No relation to Isabel... I hope - for her sake.)
1987 - Peter Tosh, Jamaican reggae singer-songwriter. (Not one of the Monkees)
1994 - Jessica Tandy, English stage and film actress. (No longer in need to be driven around, Mrs. Daisy is not... Well, she got one last ride - in a hearse...)
2003 - John Ritter, American film and television actor and son of legendary country singing star and actor Tex Ritter. (More recent mourning on this ominous date on the calendar - John's son will stop everything, in his own tentative showbusiness career, and pause to mourn on this day, every single year henceforth... His attempt at following on his grandpa's and dad's footsteps - and, more particularly, at doing what his dad did so well, might be a bit of "Three's A Crowd" though...)

INTERESTING HOLIDAYS ON THIS DATE THROUGHOUT THE WORLD...
In Ethiopia, it is the New Year - nothing less than that!
Pakistan: Jinnah Day (founder's death anniversary).
Chile: National Liberation Day. (can't all be sad occasions, eh).
Philippines: Barangay Day. (note to self: google "barangay" - and ignore every queer hit...)
Niger: Cure Salee (celebration of the Salted Cure). (another "non-sad" example - good).
United States: Patriot Day. (Of course).
Cape Verde and Guinea-Bissau: National Day. (The Portuguese had no idea how ill-fated those two ventures were, back then...).
And in muslim countries, extremists rejoice hardy on this date, I'm sure...

IN CONCLUSION...
September 11th seems to be a date like so many others on the calendar really...
Only a conspiracy theorist - or a sarcastic rambler, as I am being here - would see anything else there...

;)